Minnesota Renaissance Festival

Arm thy wallet with cash and thy chariot with a full tank of gas, for the Minnesota Renaissance Festival is in full regalia once again in its 30th anniversary of entertainment. Twelve stages with everything from the traditional fairy tale of Cinderella told in spoonerisms from the Tory Steller, to a full-contact Armored Joust. You’ll find 270 craft shops including fine jewelry, leather roses, and four-foot broadswords. And your appetite will be aroused by more than 50 food booths where you can slurp soup in a bread bowl for an appetizer, down a turkey drumstick bigger than your arm for the entree, and indulge in a decadent—and enormous—cream puff for dessert. Altogether, the 22-acre “village” comes to life with fairies, chickens, and royalty, but if you’re planning to bring the kids, covering their ears and eyes now and then might be wholly necessary. The humor is occasionally lewd, and characters have no anachronistic qualms about obscenity. One can bypass these, though, with lots of children’s attractions—games and rides galore! Just don’t forget thy “Lady Visa” or thy “Master Card.” Heh heh. Minnesota Renaissance Festival, (952) 445-7361, www.renaissancefest.com


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