Having "It," but not necessarily talking about "It"

Note to "media types:" Your power by using sexual innuedno to get the "prized audience" isn’t working so well…anymore!

I have been spending a lot of time lately doing research on what people read and why. There are a few important areas that seem to bug the future of this country and the ones who will ultimately be the ones to make or break the disastrous state of our economy.

First of all, kids, for the most part, are honest about everything. They are informed, sometimes too much, and can smell a phony from miles away.

I asked my "research group" to help me understand what drives them to the sources they use for information, besides what they learn in school. The conclusion of my study was not surprising to me personally, but may be to some of you "media types…"

Let me begin with this: The people I have been doing research with are teenagers fromĀ ALL walks of life and from different socio-economic backgrounds.

Without giving away too much of the valuable information that I have accumulated over the last several months, I will share with you this, a portion of what I heard: "Don’t think we can’t figure out when someone has to use SEX in a headline to get our attention. If the writer has real experience and wants our attention, then it will happen naturally because we are inundated with images of SEX all day long and are numb to it. Thanks to the Internet, cable TV, bad radio shows…etc…We don’t think that SEX is any big deal."

This, to me, a 40-year-old woman who is not embarrassed to say that I still feel shy about sex, is sad and disturbing.The allure of those great things in life we call "Chemistry" and "Love" seems to have hit the skids. And the adults who are using the innocence of young people to take away one of the pleasures we look forward to in life are responsible. This admittedly including myself at times.

Sex may sell to some, but after a lot of conversations with the young ones, the excitement of the unknown, the mystery of what makes you fall in love and experience sex are still right where they should be: in their hearts. They still want it to be experienced the old-fashioned way: through unconditional love, honesty, kindness, respect, compassion, and friendship. Not from a "media type" who clearly would not have to talk about something sacred if they were getting that something sacred at home.

As I was told by my parents and try to convey to my own teenagers: If you have "it," enjoy "it," and appreciate "it." The ones who don’t have "it" are easy to spot; just go on your gut and your morals and you will know.