Year: 2005

  • The Game of Life

    My son Isaac and I were playing Scrabble at our dining room table one recent evening when the phone rang. As always, Isaac ran to answer it. He heard his sixteen-year-old sister’s voice on the other end of the line. She was calling from her father’s house in St. Paul. When he heard that she wanted to talk to me, like any thirteen-year-old little brother, he made her wait.

    “What do you want to talk to mom for?”

    “Give her the phone, Isaac! I have to talk to her now!”

    I was sitting across the table, silent yet hearing everything, watching this scene go down. As always, I was conflicted. How far do I let them take the battle before I step in and pull rank? And how much longer will I be able to? It’s a nasty fact of parenting teenagers that as each day passes, your Dr. Spock death grip loosens. Edicts become suggestions, proclamations become proposals.

    I came out of my misty reverie to realize that a couple of minutes had passed and Isaac was still holding the receiver tight to his ear. He had launched into tactical taunting, repeating everything his sister said in a creepy, quiet, old-lady voice.

    The louder she got, the quieter his whispering became.

    “ISAAC! Give mom the phone NOW!”

    “Isaac, give mom the phone now … hehehe.”

    “ISAAC!”

    “Eye-zz … ack … hehehe.”

    I let this foolishness go on another minute until my daughter had resorted to yelling and my son had begun barking in response to her, like a dog who’d mistakenly knocked the receiver off the hook. This brings new meaning to family game night, yes?

    I wrested the phone from the boy, who dissolved into giggles, then dug his hand into the letter sack for more tiles. My daughter was frantic. Her dad is a cabinetmaker with a home workshop and something had gone very wrong.

    One of the most horrible aspects of horrible accidents is that you never know just when they are about to be rained down upon you, or someone you love. The overwhelming sense of bewilderment mixes with fear and pain, and the surprise factor shakes it all up like a fizzy panic cocktail.
    “Honey—what’s going on?”

    “Mom there’s been an accident and Dad cut his hand bad in the table saw and we’re at the emergency room and I don’t know but I think he lost a finger or two and he drove to the hospital with his hurt hand wrapped in a towel and I’m worried about him and they’ve got him back there now but I saw a lot of blood!”

    She calmed down long enough to answer the where, what, and how questions accurately. After we devised a plan of action, I debriefed Isaac, who was mortified at his phone antics in light of this new information. I assured him that with his heartfelt apology, his sister would forgive him.

    Then I used his remorse as a teaching moment to stress the importance of telephone etiquette.

    Then I used his remorse to get him to take out the garbage.

    With nothing to do but wait for the next phone call from the emergency room, we sat at the table and continued our game in thoughtful quiet. Isaac, no doubt reflecting on the disturbing events of the evening. Me, contemplating the absurd notion of control.

    In a sober tone, Isaac broke the silence. “Hey mom, you don’t think Steve lost his thumb, do you?”

    “Gosh, hon, I don’t know. I hope not. That would be awful.”

    Isaac’s brow furrowed as he looked at me across the game board and said, in all seriousness, “Yeah. Because you know, that’s the only thing that separates us from the animals.”

    Maybe it was suppressed hysteria breaking through, but I howled with laughter. Still, it did get me thinking later that night, on my way to the hospital, about what does separate us from the animals.

    I’d like to say that it’s passion, but anyone who’s seen a dog dig after a bone knows better. And it can’t be art, because if you’ve ever witnessed the lace of a spider web in the morning sunlight, you know there’s way too much incidental beauty on this Earth for us to take special credit for what we create. It can’t be politics, because lions have prides, and hives have monarchies.

    And so it must be power tools.

  • Guy Nelson

    Guy Nelson, Guy Nelson–someone please tell us why we’re stuck on this Guy’s name. He’s certainly making a splash at SooVAC, having filled its space–no mean feat–with a host of found-object sculptures and five large-scale paintings. We were drawn to the paintings’ mix of abstraction and primitive/cartoonish representation, along with their goofy titles and a great Pepto-Bismol shade that Nelson seems to favor, but his sculptural provocations based around phalluses failed to strike a chord. (Do penises still shock the young folks?) What did resonate were works like the Dada-ish Inside a Supermodel’s Leg; and Sweet Jesus! a bust of the Son of God made from sticky red licorice that necessarily recalls Marc Quinn’s notorious self-portrait bust made from his frozen blood. Overall, the show is playful, but with a darkly humorous bite: HISSSS features a trike towing a cheerful garland of plastic flowers, among which stuffed rattlesnakes are hidden. 2640 Lyndale Ave. S., Minneapolis; 612-871-2263; www.soovac.org

  • The Other Kind of Outing

    Behind every news exposé, be it sporty (Barry Bonds and steroids), vengeful (outing CIA operative Valerie Plame), or just plain titillating (those tidbits about Monica Lewinsky’s blue dress), there is almost always a confidential source. Without confidential sources (and the reporters who love them), Watergate would simply refer to an upscale Washington hotel and C.J. would be out of a job.

    News sources, as well as their close siblings, whistleblowers, understand all too well that the only difference between being a confidential source and an unmasked source is the reporter’s promise to keep their identity a secret. It’s purely a matter of trust, with no legal recourse should a reporter, sensing that someone might have to take a bullet for the team, renege on his promise and reveal his source. Or he might simply decide that the name of the source should be part of the story. In either case, the source can do nothing but suck it up.

    That is, until Dan Cohen, author of the soon-to-be-published Anonymous Source, successfully sued the local dailies for outing him as the confidential source of political dirt that effectively ended the career of one high-profile politician, and tarnished the reputation of another. Cohen was the Minneapolis City Council president back in the late sixties, when Republicans actually got elected to office in Minneapolis. After briefly helping to run the Peace Corps during the Nixon administration, and making failed bids for Minneapolis mayor and county commissioner, Cohen settled into the advertising business. He also remained a loyal foot soldier for Republican candidates.

    In 1982, he was carrying water for Republican gubernatorial candidate Wheelock Whitney, who, less than two weeks before the election, was trailing the ultimately victorious Rudy Perpich by twenty points. Cohen, hoping for one of those October miracles, volunteered to make public copies of police records that showed Perpich running mate Marlene Johnson had a shoplifting conviction. He took the information to the Star Tribune and the Pioneer Press.

    Before Cohen gave up the goods, he secured promises of anonymity from both papers. The dailies ran the story next day—with Cohen’s name and picture. Soon thereafter, the Star Tribune ran a cartoon depicting him crawling out of a garbage can, and Cohen lost his ad agency job. When he managed to get a small advertising gig with the University of Minnesota, Strib columnist Doug Grow self-righteously castigated the U of M for consorting with a bottom feeder like Cohen.

    Within weeks, Cohen was virtually unemployable. He was broke, and a political pariah to boot. With his back to the wall, Cohen believed he had nothing to lose by, in his words, “suing the bastards.”

    All the legal wrangling aside, wasn’t what Cohen did—leaking an opponent’s ancient shoplifting conviction days before an election—well, dirty politics? Cohen had a ready answer. “On reflection, I admit that it was mean and if I had to do it all over, I probably would not do it. However, it was not dirty. I gave the newspapers truthful information about a candidate’s criminal history. Before I ran for county commissioner I got arrested for scalping Kentucky Derby tickets. I wrote a humorous column about it so the voters knew. I got my butt handed to me in the following election, but everything was out there. I did not lie to or conceal anything from anyone. Playing dirty is when you promise to protect someone and then you rat them out.”

    So many years later, why should people care about Cohen’s story? He had an answer for that as well. “The media is all over Connecticut Senator Christopher Dodd’s Free Speech Protection Act of 2004, which will give reporters federal protection for refusing to reveal their confidential sources. I am not opposed to that, but they have protection. Reporters have big media on their side. Guys like me, we are totally on our own. If the media decides to burn us, as they did me, we burn—humiliated and totally abandoned to our fates.”

    Dan Cohen may not be the most sympathetic figure in the world, but he does have a point. Let’s face it: People in power are usually not going to voluntarily reveal damaging information. And even though there are some courageous people who have the cojones to publicly reveal what they know—Jeffrey Wigand, who blew the whistle on Big Tobacco, and FBI agent Coleen Rowley come to mind—most of us will only do so under the cloak of anonymity. We need to know that if anyone is going to take a bullet for our truthful whispers in the shadows, it will not be us.

  • The Last Bohemian

    In August of 1953, the American painter Beauford Delaney was aboard the ocean liner Liberté, bound for Paris, the city in which he would spend the rest of his life. The ship’s purser asked Delaney if he wouldn’t mind regaling the other passengers with some jazz standards. Delaney, it seems, had written “artiste” on his travel papers—which implied that he was a performer. If he chafed at the assumption that any black artist must necessarily be a jazz singer, Delaney didn’t record it in his journal. Instead, he obligingly (and drunkenly) sang “Old Man River” for his well-heeled fellow travelers. But then again, Delaney wasn’t a man unused to performing for the white world: As an artiste, his most vivid creation was himself.

    Delaney, whose work is currently the subject of a major retrospective at the Minneapolis Institute of Arts, has slowly been creeping back into fashion decades after he died, penniless and largely unknown, in a French insane asylum. Such a critical rehabilitation is well overdue: Delaney is blazingly good—if more than a little perplexing.

    Part of what’s confounding about Beauford Delaney: From New York to Paris—which includes portraits and streetscapes, as well as the wild abstractions for which Delaney is best known—is that it seems to include the work of at least a half-dozen artists, each with his own distinct style and lineage. Delaney’s essentially chameleonic nature makes it nearly impossible to place him in any sort of art historical tradition. On the evidence of a 1958 piece like Abstraction (Autumn), in which whorls of red and yellow imply dense autumn foliage, you’d swear he fit best with the Abstract Expressionists. Then again, the playful, squiggly brushstrokes and bold colors of his wonderful 1946 Jazz Quartet suggest a painter under the spell of Matisse and Cézanne. Likewise, Delaney is difficult to classify according to any of the other usual categories. He was black, but moved with equal facility in both black and white circles; he was gay, but puritanical and self-conflicted about sexuality; he was American, but took much of his inspiration from Europe. Delaney’s restless, alchemical approach to painting makes one want to throw out those fussy taxonomies and just enjoy the damn stuff.

    Delaney was born in Knoxville in 1901, the son of a former slave and a Methodist circuit-riding minister. Contrary to the later popular assumption that he was self-taught, Delaney actually apprenticed with an older painter in Knoxville, a Confederate apologist who specialized in landscapes. Later, this unlikely mentor facilitated Delaney’s formal art education at Boston’s Lowell Institute.

    Life as an artist didn’t really begin for Delaney until he moved to New York in 1929, however. His welcome was not particularly warm; he was robbed of all his worldly belongings within a few hours of arriving in Harlem. In fact, because of his homosexuality, Delaney never felt comfortable in the relatively bourgeois milieu of Harlem’s black society. Instead, destitute and malnourished, he ended up in a decrepit Greenwich Village apartment. His was literally a cold-water flat: One winter, the pipes beneath the floor froze solid, and Delaney was hobbled by frostbite from walking on the frigid planks.

    Even under such desperate circumstances, Delaney seems to have found time to befriend nearly every artist in New York. He was close with Henry Miller, acted as a kind of spiritual adviser to James Baldwin, and became at least acquainted with everyone from W.C. Handy and W.E.B. Du Bois to Anaïs Nin and Alfred Stieglitz. To them, Delaney was a smiling, gnomish eccentric; to Delaney, his friends were a source of money and food as much as companionship. Perhaps as a way to settle perceived debts, Delaney often painted flattering portraits of his friends and patrons. One of the finest in the MIA exhibit is his 1941 painting of a young James Baldwin, Dark Rapture. In it, a lithe and apparently nude Baldwin is posed as a classical Adonis in a sylvan setting. The colors—pastel purples and pinks, along with boldly deployed slashes of dark green—are pretty obviously influenced by van Gogh. The tone of the portrait, however, is pure Delaney: A sinuous intertwining of the erotic and the mystical, an adoration both spiritual and sexual.

    In 1945, Miller wrote an essay about his painter friend, “The Amazing and Invariable Beauford Delaney.” Like a lot of Miller’s writing, it seems overheated; nevertheless, it made Delaney a Village celebrity. More than one acquaintance compared him to Joe Gould, a classic New York eccentric made famous by New Yorker writer Joseph Mitchell. Mitchell’s description of Gould—“a blithe and emaciated little man”—could indeed have applied equally to Delaney. For his part, Delaney cultivated the reputation of a bohemian guru and a gentle, Buddha-like sage. Even frequent episodes of sweaty, drunken delirium became part of his put-on persona (in addition to being a serious alcoholic, Delaney was likely an undiagnosed schizophrenic). There’s an often-repeated story about Baldwin and Delaney walking down the street in New York. Delaney pointed out a pool of filthy water in the gutter, iridescent with gasoline. When Baldwin didn’t see anything, Delaney said, “Look again.” Finally, Baldwin saw the shimmering reflection of the city. That same dreamy transfiguration of New York comes through in streetscapes like Delaney’s 1940 Greene Street. Here, the grimy workaday elements of the city—a manhole cover and sewer grate, for instance—are rearranged in a floating Kandinsky-esque dream landscape.

    Given how Delaney responded to the vibrant environs of Greenwich Village, it’s hard to understand why he chose to leave America in 1953. Maybe he was seeking the racial and sexual egalité that Baldwin and Miller seemed to have discovered in Europe. Or maybe he intuited that his art was out of step with the macho primitivism that characterized the exploding New York art world: While Jackson Pollock and his fellow Abstract Expressionists were creating an art fit for the rhythm of American industry and the violence of the A-bomb, Delaney’s work remained suffused with the gentle grace of an Old Master. Or perhaps, as his journal suggests, Delaney originally intended to return to New York, but simply liked Paris so much that he decided to stay.

    Paris has, of course, always represented some sort of resplendent Shangri-La—a “moveable feast,” in Hemingway’s words—to American artists. In Oscar Wilde’s memorable quip, it’s the place good Americans go when they die (bad Americans go to America, naturally). That wild bohemian Paris of Hemingway and Gertrude Stein was already a faded myth by Delaney’s time, but the air of Old World grandeur still clung to the city in the American imagination. Artists certainly weren’t chasing their muse to Akron or Frankfurt. Unlike Baldwin and Miller, however, Delaney thought of himself less as an exile than as a traveler. An exile, after all, carries the memories of home with him wherever he goes; a traveler maintains a passionate, childlike openness to the experience of a new place. In his journal, he recorded his first impression of France: “the light inscrutable, eternal, serene, wordless, yet sovereign, moving yet still including all things, silencing all things.” The light in Paris seems, in fact, to have triggered his most radical self-reinvention.

    Not that his life was any easier in Paris: Delaney’s garret in Montparnasse was every bit as tumbledown as his New York quarters had been. He still relied on friends for food and money. At one point, in fact, he was so destitute that he turned his raincoat into a canvas (the painting he made from it is cleverly displayed at the MIA so that you can see the coat pocket on the reverse side). But the paintings he made in Paris are so unlike anything he’d done before that it’s hard to believe they were done by the same person: Almost purely abstract, these giant canvases are exp
    losions of color. The sprays and squiggles of soft blues and warm reds give the heavily worked pieces an almost quilt-like texture. But unlike the similarly Expressionist paintings of Jackson Pollock, there’s nothing violent or aggressive about them.

    One of these pieces is named for Charlie Parker’s “Yardbird Suite,” and it has the same cool, intellectual precision as that exemplary piece of music. During his time in Paris, Delaney also fell under the spell of Monet—particularly the now-famous water lily paintings displayed at the Orangerie, which Monet painted during his blind dotage. Delaney’s late abstractions have that same admixture of melancholy and serenity. Beneath their heavily worked surfaces and turbulent colors, these paintings work a synesthetic magic: Merely to be in a room with them is to feel Delaney’s beatific calm.

    Delaney’s life didn’t end after a peaceful and prosperous old age, unfortunately. In the grip of worsening dementia, he took to wandering his Paris neighborhood, a wraith-like figure supported only by the few of his surviving friends who still lived in the city. But even knowing that his mind was probably slipping from its moorings as he painted his abstractions can’t diminish their radical freshness. If his subsequent tumble into obscurity seems like an unjust fate for an artist who probably should have been considered in the first rank of American painters, c’est la vie. In a weird way, it may even be the very qualities that made Delaney such a baffling cipher during his lifetime—his restless, protean approach to life and art-making, as well as his openness to influences both American and European—give the MIA’s retrospective its frisson of discovery. How else could you label such a vagabond spirit except as an American original?

  • Stick With Us

    It has come to our attention that someone around town is stickering our noble little magazine racks. First, there was a sticker with the strange invocation to “Fight Commonism.” Now, either the same party, or someone else, has decided to emend that bold statement with “Republicans Suck” in a few true, blue locations.

    After a great deal of street-walking, note-taking, and question-asking, we now know who was responsible for the first round of stickering.

    It was us. As it turns out, our good friends at AB advertising helped us develop this little campaign, which at one point grew ambitious enough to make the leap to cable TV. In that ad, we poked a little fun directly at our friendly colleagues in high places, who had suffered the embarrassment of getting caught, uh, sycophanting the same person at the same time.

    We have had some small reservations about the opportunity for misunderstanding this whole “commonism” thing, particularly on the radio ads. In the mouths of less-experienced or more-harried broadcasters, it has been audibly mispronounced as “communism.” While the invitation to “fight communism” is rakish in a pleasant sort of way—who doesn’t like to be put in the game when the score is out of reach?—it is not a precise representation of our politics around here. (We leave it to you to decide what those are. The one thing you can count is that we love a good argument, and by the time we’re done, we don’t remember what our opinion was in the first place. If there was a party called “Devil’s Advocate,” we’d join up faster than you could say, “Paul Magers is actually kinda complex, I could read a thousand magazine articles about him, and die wanting more.”)

    So but! What is with these “Republicans Suck” stickers? We are not happy about them. The vandals can’t possibly believe we here at The Rake are so unseemly in our affiliations as to have a declared party. The possibilities boggle the beleagured mind. Do they know that we stickered the “Commonism” bits, but they misread it as “communism,” and assume we are old-school, red-baiting McCarthy-ites? That would be a middling kind of ignorance—smart enough to recognize the irony of us stickering our own racks, but not smart enough to spell correctly, nor to read the magazine very closely. Are they rushing to our defense, thinking we are under attack by old-school, red-baiting GOPers? That would be a sort of charming naivete, compounded by the spelling and reading problem. Are they just silly kids looking for a safe place to put a provocative sticker? That would be the most-likely, least time-wasting conclusion a busy editor could make.

  • War of Words

    In today’s New York Observer, our old friend Philip Weiss indulges us in one of our favorite subjects—the history of the New Yorker. Weiss, you may know, began his decorated career in journalism here in the Twin Cities and some of his most memorable stories have been set in the area. (His profile in Harper’s of Stephen Blumberg, the Twin Cities native who took bibliophila to felonious new heights, is a classic.)

    Anyway, Weiss reiterates the story of New Yorker writer Jack Kahn, who was one of the magazine’s most prolific authors, and helped establish its national reputation by writing from the ranks of the U.S. Army during World War II. We’ve mentioned before one of the mechanical reasons the New Yorker supersized its national reputation (and circulation) after the war—they’d cultivated a massive readership in the military itself with free Pony editions. When GIs got home from the war, they became subscribers en masse, wherever they lived.

    Weiss makes a good case based on aesthetics as well. Before World War II, the magazine was fizzy. It still considered itself primarily a humor magazine set in the Jazz age. War changed the tenor of the times, and would either kill the the magazine or require it to evolve. It was always a good magazine, but a world war was the kind of journalistic material that created an opportunity to make a lasting contribution to American letters. Harold Ross and his staff rose to the occasion, and their achievement has now persisted for three-quarters of a century. (The title of Weiss’s article, “The New Yorker at War,” is also the title of an old anthology of the magazine’s best pieces from World War II. Highly recommended.)

    It makes us sad to consider how times have changed. We hate to be defeatist, but it seems like no amount of courage today is enough to do meaningful work in the field of journalism, particularly as it pertains to Iraq. Print as a medium has certainly declined in substance and style, but more crucially, the entire culture is inured to journalism. Reporters and writers are held in low esteem—generally considered either rubes to be manipulated by PR flacks, or partisan snipers to be avoided at any cost. In both cases, the free movement of both mind and body are gone, for the journalist. The borders are closed; we simply do not get the access or the respect that reporters got in the middle of the last century.

    To get directly to the point: Why aren’t there any memorable stories coming out of Iraq—the most important story of the new century? It is because good, thoughtful, independent writers are not getting in or out, and the military has a waterproof monopoly on virtually all meaningful information there. If it does not support the campaign, it is not allowed. Please refer to your wallet-card instructions for dealing with the press.

    More subtly, the main difference between then and now is this: Today’s volunteer army is far more class-segregated than the drafted armies of the second world war. The New Yorker had a number of established young writers who were subsequently drafted and went to war. Almost to a man, these young fellows wished to continue to write for the New Yorker. Today, nothing is more rare than a trained writer in the ranks. Even if we could find him, he would have a snowball’s chance in hell of getting clearance to write for an independent, objective, for-profit magazine. If the military has learned anything in the past fifty years, it’s how to use information as yet another weapon in the arsenal. Never has the phrase “loose lips sink ships” been more threatening to the simple enterprise of telling a truthful and engaging story about the most important, brutally dangerous moment in our lifetimes.

  • The Devil's Music Magazine

    Yesterday, USA Today reported that Rolling Stone magazine has turned down an ad from a Bible publisher. A company called Zondervan, apparently the largest publisher of Bibles in the nation, wanted to buy a full-spread advertisement to reach out to “spiritually intrigued 18 to 34 years olds.” This is a demographic that is supposedly buying religious and spiritual books as if their life depended on it—except for the Holy Bible. Citing some obscure policy against religious advertising, Jann Wenner’s godless people decided to pass. We can see the inter-office memo now:

    “We regret to inform you that our spiritual director, Satan, sees a conflict of interest in advertising your book with us. This would be a little like NBC agreeing to ads for ABC. We’re sure you can understand that. We were crazy to consider this in the first place, although we are not in the habit of turning down money from anyone. That smacks dangerously of morality, and how far in the world we get with morality? Not very far, indeed!”

    We’ve joked about all the strange human behavior we’re seeing that might be signalling the end-times—but actually, it all comes down to that hoary boogeyman, the “emboldened religious right.” There is something both reassuring and disturbing about Rolling Stone’s seemingly random enforcement of what they admit is an “unwritten policy.” On the one hand, it feels like tit-for-tat: You cannot simultaneously condemn the godless youth culture and its secular overlords, and co-opt them in your ad campaigns. On the other hand, why is the “embattled left” so uncomformtable with traditional religion?

    Christians, for their part, should take a good long look in the mirror and realize that their sur-name is not as blameless as they might like it to be. The extended family, from radical protestants to insane evangelicals, has made the whole country jumpy. Regular people who prefer to take their spirituality with a heavy chaser of secular realism, want no part of “organized religion” because it harbors too many hippocritical, hateful people. Soon it will be neceessary to clarify just what kind of Christian you are—just as we now expect practicing Muslims to disavow fundamentalism.

    Up until now, it’s been a sort of one-sided story of conservative Christians strong-arming their views onto a nervous public, with the complicity of conservative media owners. It was a mere six weeks ago that two television network refused to run ads for the United Church of Christ which made it clear that this progressive denomination was, unlike the louder sects of the self-righteous, open to gays and lesbians and minorities. Last year, the International Bible Society successfully inserted the Gospel of Luke into the Houston Chronicle. And just a few weeks ago, the Colorado Springs Gazette accepted the entire New Testament as an insert.

    The Bible is the world’s best-selling book ever, and it is copyright free. It is free money to anyone who wants to publish it. Of course, the marketplace has been flooded, and there is some question as to whether supply has not exceeded demand . Still, there is something tawdry about advertising the Holy Bible—a method of indirect evangelizing that falls somewhere between street-pamphleteering and the siren-call of the personal injury lawyers. There used to be gentleman’s agreements that certain aspects of our lives were to be held above the shimmy-shake of the ad-man’s solicitations. But of course, those times are long gone. Where would Jesus advertise?

    It is gratifying that people seem to be getting unfortable with pushy religious sorts. Our nation was founded on religious freedom, but more important than that, it was founded on religious dissent. A magazine that is nothing without dissent—or at least the marketable perception of dissent, the cornerstone of rock ‘n’ roll—probably cannot afford to be associated in the minds of its readers with the opposite of dissent, which is blind faith.

    But a thoughtful person admits there is something unsettling about Rolling Stone’s decision. Any publisher can refuse advertising for any reason (although they may not be able to avoid law suits when they do), but their actions suggest that they think there is something wrong with reading the most important text of Western Civilization. If more people read the Bible for themselves, free from the insane interpretations of greasy-haired bullies in pulpits, on soapboxes, and on cable TV, the scales might fall from their eyes, and they might see how the good name of Christianity (and, by the way, Judaism and Islam—people of “The Book,” you know) is being destroyed by the self-righteous forcing it into the secular world, which does not tolerate absolutism very well or for very long.

    Still, we’re troubled. We wonder if this whole dust-up somehow invalidates that ordination we received years ago through one of Rolling Stone’s classified ads.

  • What We Said Vs. What We Meant

    Last Friday, we had what must have been the biggest, most mirthful Rakish party yet. Sad to say, the Big Boss was dreadfully sick, which is a shame, because no one hosts a party like the Big Boss. Still, just about anyone and everyone who is responsible for putting together The Rake was there, in fine form. High point of the evening was a game of doubles on the billiards table. Shooters were quizzed on a capricious list of great titles from literature. It was not required to know who wrote, for example, The Stranger, in order to take your shot. An incorrect or incomplete answer was just as acceptable as a correct one, and anyone in the gallery could offer an answer. It was rather like cognitive bumper-pool—brainteasers as distractions and obstacles. For some reason, we were stuck on science fiction authors and existentialist authors—perhaps because we thought these would be easiest. Perhaps because the mental horizons had been considerably contracted by a lot of really, really good wine. Anyway, we managed to stump Hugh Bennewitz with a reversal. What was Alexis de Tocvqueville’s most famous book? Bennewitz demurred, and we answered— incorrectly, or at least incompletely, “America.” In all fairness, this should go down in the minutes as a demerit to the question-asker. The title of De Toqueville’s most famous work is, of course, “Democracy in America.” We are sorry. But we know what we meant.

    It is often the spirit of the thing that counts. This morning, we read James Woolcott’s takedown of the insufferable Charles Krauthammer, and we couldn’t agree more. A well-established truism: One of the underpinnings of the red wave has been the echo chamber of right-wing bloggers, radio, and TV, who simply will not let go of certain arguments and certain incidents, no matter how specious or wrong they are. It’s like Chinese water torture with these people.

    We find it especially interesting that in all the kerfuffle about “Rathergate” (egad, we thought the -gate suffix had finally been staked through the heart, along with -stock, but we live in regressive times— hello, again, Gilded Age! Goodbye, New Deal!), no one has ever argued the facts, only the documentation. This is a happy situation for the right, which has strangely become the party of moral relativism. These days, no one argues more loudly than a conservative that the message is indistinguishable from the messenger, that it is impossible to have a truly objective journalism, and therefore we must wallow in a constant jet-stream of gas and bile.

    Anyway, the whole point of “Rathergate” has, from the right’s point of view, become a smoking gun on the liberal bias of the media. Of course, no amount of painful soul-searching, and no mea culpa at any volume will satisfy these people. Because once we move beyond that perfect storm of speculation and conspiracy theory, we are left with what we are always left with—the plain old boring facts. Why is it more improtant that Dan Rather got duped by forgeries than that our president went AWOL? Why did the Swift Boat vets continue to have an impact on the national consciousness after their claims had been eviscerated by serious journalists? Why have the stories that independently confirmed the essential claims and spirit of the news report that became Rathergate been pushed aside? Why does no one care when the present administration actually pays a reporter to produce news that is favorable to his benefactor? Why have we been acting as if Vietnam never happened? Because this is what the right-leaning media does best—strike up the band, especially the trombone section, whenever there is partisan skirmish to be won, and especially when there are inconvenient facts to be obscured. Which is at all times and in all places.

  • When did you stop blogging your wife?

    We should be worried about our extremities today, rather than our extremists. Last night, we repaired down the block to meet up with one of our favorite blogging professionals for a beer, and nearly lost a few toes in the process. We also lost the desire to proceed any further with the editorial “we” until the weather improves. At fifteen below, it’s each man for himself.

    I tend to cross the street when I see a discussion of “bloggers versus journalists” coming down the way. Or at least I nestle a little deeper into my parka and avoid eye contact. But I guess I do have a few loose opinions on the matter.

    In nervous moments, I worry about the confusion of opinion and reporting in the newspages and on the airwaves. There is virtually no distinction anymore between news and news analysis, and this can be troubling. As Tom Tomorrow so eloquently parses this week, the right has been especially effective at a certain kind of slight-of-hand that swaps facts for opinion. You simply offer a disputed opinion as an accepted fact. This is the legendary “When did you stop beating your wife?” approach to colloquy. Why, we do it ourselves. It’s fun!

    Earlier this week, Adam Penenberg wrote that news organizations are cracking down on their employees who blog, taking a dim view of the possible conflicts of interest and the corruption of opinion in news reporting. This is a noble concern, of course—typically, you are not granted official “blogger” status if you must run your posts by an editor or a publisher or a boss of any kind. We have been known to edit our posts here, or run them by lawyers to make sure we’re on the up-and-up, but we consider the daily operation to be part of the larger mechanics of our business. (We don’t officially call this–what you’re reading–a blog for this reason, and one other. To paraphrase Kurt Vonnegut, the blogging drawer frequently gets mistaken for the urinal in the offices of Big Media.) Perhaps larger news organizations should consider this approach. But what is most subtle is the basic paradigm at work, separate from the issues of objectivity and conflict of interest and that is that newspapers don’t want their websites to get scooped by their own writers and reporters. In other words, there is still a fundamental prejudice for paper, a “So when did you stop blogging your wife?”paradigm. This is understandable, since there are still no margins whatsoever in online publishing. But this is a sort of self-fulfilling pessimism. If news organizations paid their reporters to post scoops—as well as clearly identified, informed opinion—in the name of their employer’s brand, well, maybe advertisers would become more inclined to take the web seriously. It’s an issue of critical mass, of course. But if editors and publishers got over some of their prejudices, the whole business of journalism would advance a few baby steps.

    As I say, this may mean learning to get more comfortable with the Fox approach to journalism which freely deals in news-as-entertainment, and opinion-as-news-as-entertainment. There is a way to accept and embrace this feeling of rudderlessness on a windy sea: Accept more of it, rather than demand less.

    Being the broken-record that I am, it eternally recurs to me to reread E.B. White, and it is astonishing how timeless and timely some of his political essays are. Long before Watergate and Vietnam, he worried about the state of democracy, and his basic point was a genteel one: he said democracy is in peril when the unbeliever feels unwelcome here. In other words, it is essential that dissent be not only tolerated but safeguarded. These are not concrete, enactable values (and certainly not the exclusive property of the left) so much as a basic human generosity of spirit to live and let live. “I have yet to see a piece of writing, political or non-political, that doesn’t have a slant,” he wrote. “All writing slants the way a writer leans,and no man is born perpendicular, although many men are born upright.”

    In that respect, I sometimes feel like I have lost an essential virtue—faith in my fellows, that they were born upright. Despite what I view as the conspiracy of lies and the lockstep of blind obedience that prop up the current monopoly, there is consolation in knowing that this is generating more heated blogging, more rabid conversation about first principles, not less. That the extreme right has somehow cultivated a sense of humor in its ascendency is annoying—but reassuring. They can recommend eliminating freedom of the press all they like, but until they do it, it’s just grist for the creative anarchy of the web.

    Now, when they start actually messing with the Constitution is when we should take to the streets, no matter how cold it might be.

  • Goal!

    When you develop a fondness for a particular magazine writer, sometimes you begin to realize that you share their interests. Not many writers, of course, get to write about what interests them. In the never-ending battle to put food on the table, writers must deal with very high levels of rejection and frustration. When you are a writer, there are stories you really want to do, but you soon come to the rather defeatist conclusion that no one else on the planet—least of all your editors—see them for the brilliant ideas they are. And so you scrape together story pitches you know they will be interested in, and to varying degrees you feel your soul leeching away.

    A sort of upper-ring of purgatory in the writing game is having a job you basically like, where you aren’t required to actually freelance to keep the wolf from the door. Then you get the occasional phone call from someone somewhere who digs your style and wants you to write something for them. You can say yes, you can say no—but you call the shots based on your interest and availability. A very wise person once told us: Never do anything just for the money. That’s all well and good, but freelance writers will starve on advice like that. But perhaps they’ll starve happy.

    Anyway, in the midst of this cold snap, we were gratified to read Charles McGrath’s review of “The Boys of Winter,” in the Times Book Review. The last time we saw McGrath’s byline was a very nicely done profile of Tom Wolfe for the Times magazine. Normally, we think it’s silly to try to mimick the style of one’s subject, when one’s subject is an intensely idiosyncratic stylist like Tom Wolfe. But McGrath pulled it off nicely, and he knew precisely when to stop with the—damn! can’t breath! is that the sound of my own heartbeat? or rat-a-tat-tat of Compaq laptop genius, hold fast! (The main reason we got interested in Wolfe’s new book at all, and dedicated practically a whole week to this pulpish timesink before wisely putting it aside, was McGrath’s profile in the magazine, and Jacob Weisberg’s critique in the Book Review, two of the most memorable magazine pieces in the past six months.)

    It’s fun to think that McGrath can turn from a playful profile of a dandy irritant like Wolfe to the 1980 US Olympic Hockey Team, and that’s what he does here. We can’t think of a less timely, less necessary book, but McGrath finds a way to write about hockey that is fresh, fun, and interesting. It makes us realize just how impoverished we are in the world of sports writing. Compare, for example, the print journalism in Great Britain that rumbles along with the English Premier football league. (On our top-ten books of all time: this little-read Hornby volume, his first published book.) It’s not just a matter of recording the goals and the hooligans. It’s a matter of recreating the gutter-level myths of the game, and making a record of the intense emotional ups and downs. It’s about What It All Means, and you just don’t see that very much in American sports writing. (Baseball has, over the years, had many memorable practitioners. But why should those guys have a monopoly on the art? It’s not as if baseball is inherently more interesting or complex than, say, boxing or fencing or soccer.)

    In his review of Wayne Coffey’s new book, McGrath makes it clear that where Coffey excels is in artfully describing the game of hockey itself. The best way to do this is to approximate the play-by-play action of a specific game, rather than attempt any sort of grandiose poetry of the sport taken as a whole. And the 1980 upset over the Soviets is not just a legendary moment in sport, politics, and international relations. It is a mythic game looked at strictly as three periods of ice hockey. Of course, it’s necessary to set the stage—and that requires a lot of interesting analysis of the team dynamic (lots of tension between the stoic Minnesotans and the ballbusting New Englanders; an angel-devil rivalry between Wisconsin coach Bob Johnson and Minnesota coach Herb Brooks, and so on). Coffey apparently pulls it off, and so does McGrath…. fine examples of writers who have achieved the rare privelege of being allowed to write anything they please, and keep renewing that privelege with great stories. We wish others could write this well about the cliche-ridden world of professional sports. Failing that, they might for the sake of human decency, stop trying.