In your review long ago of Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King [the Broken Clock, December 2004], you suggested to bring “plenty of nerd repellent.” Do you know where I might be able to purchase some effective nerd repellent? I live in a backward state called Illinois where the inmates are running the asylum, so to speak. Social norms have been reversed and nerds have been able to focus their anger and frustration to repress anything that is cool. Nerds have banded together to give the appearance of coolness in their social cliques, but really they just create jealousy through exclusion. They then pass off this aloofness as coolness and convince the suckers in the baby boom generation that they are actually cool and prestigious thereby gaining access to all the best jobs and exclusive clubs and such. Now you know what I know, I can only pray that I make it through the night and I am not taken out by some nerd gestapo.