A Sventabulous Time!

What is it about Sven Sundgaard? All the other news anchors are just news anchors; chipper, vaguely good looking, with the ability to pull off a solid color pantsuit. But Sven, there’s just something about him. Is it his frighteningly tan skin, regardless of season? His petite faux-hawk, nice pec muscles, and suspicious gayness? What […]

Tots, Blood, and a Broken Jaw

Yesterday, I went to the State Fair with my dad, who is my all-time favorite person to go to the Fair with. Going to the Fair with my dad is like going to Vegas with Paul Rudd’s character in the movie Knocked Up. Except, instead of ingesting hallucinogens and risking pinkeye, we ingest epic quantities […]

The Mighty Midway and Other State Fair Classics

Day two at the Fair had me excited because I brought my husband, Jason, along. For years, he’s been listening to me say things like: "If we were at the State Fair, you could get that Snickers deep-fried." "I own a collapsable rake." "I mean think about it. Nearly ninety-pounds of butter shaped like our […]


*Read about Day Two here. *Then read about Day Three here.  To me, the State Fair rivals sex, strong drinks, and Law and Order: SVU reruns. And I love fornicating almost as much as I love watching TV. Walking into the State Fair, the guy who took my ticket told me to "enjoy something on […]