Year: 2006

  • Oh yes she is…

    There’s not much in terms of exceptional after-school activities today; unless you count the special screening of Meet Me In St. Louis, with a very special guest, the former child star of that film, Ms. Margaret O’Brien (i.e., Tootie). It all happens at the Heights Theatre tonight.

    What strikes me, however, is that a lot of fashion events are coming down the pike: Glamorama, Collage, even a Rake Appeal event starring the trendmaster, Ms. Robyn Waters. Thinking about it all yesterday, I started choreographing my own little imaginary fashion show. Funny thing is that I don’t seem so concerned with what it would look like as I am with what it would sound like: everything from “Dedicated Follower of Fashion,” by The Kinks, to “I’m Not Wearing Underwear Today,” from Avenue Q. How’m on doing on cheese factor?

    The reason for my current music obsession should become apparent tomorrow when the online version of our October issue goes live. It’s all about music, see.

  • Nowhere Man?

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    Al Franken: God Spoke, 2006. Directed by Nick Doob and Chris Hegedus. With Al Franken, Franni Franken, good sport Henry Kissinger, Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity, Michael Medved, and Walter Mondale (all as themselves, obviously).

    Now showing at the Uptown Theater. Franken will appear tonight after the 7 o’clock show for a Q and A.

    There are a number of very telling moments in the documentary Al Franken: God Spoke that should raise red flags for us liberals. At a speech in Minneapolis following the 2004 election Mr. Franken mumbles “I’m… thinking of, uh, running in 2008 against Norm Coleman.” Despite facing a crowd of enthusiastic supporters, Franken can barely look up from the podium and sounds as if he’s telling his neighbor that his cat just killed their parakeet. On other occasions Al is outgunned by the likes of Anorexic Ann Coulter and Michael Medved the Movie Critic. In fact, Al Franken: God Spoke seems to accomplish the very opposite of what its makers surely intended. For the film gives us an Al Franken who is shrill, arrogant, often misguided, and who might just be the worst candidate for Senator in Minnesota come 2008.

    Al Franken: God Spoke begins with Franken the bestselling author and follows our intrepid comedian/pundit as he helps start up his radio show, on whose shoulders the beleaguered network Air America rests. From here we go back to the hell that was the 2004 Presidential Campaign, made even worse because Franken believes, seemingly wholeheartedly, that Kerry’s going to whomp Bush. The film then follows Franken as he wades into the political tidepool and thinks about running for Senate. Then we get our man and Walter Mondale eating lunch and solemnly discussing just how dastardly the Republicans will be against brave old Al.

    The worst thing about God Spoke is its utter tedium. For a film that is about a former comic with a political bent, it is surprisingly short on good jokes or humorous moments. Mostly, it’s a campaign film: it is the second film this summer to serve as both a warning and an early political ad for two candidates with the same first name. There’s a fine moment when Franken impersonates Henry Kissinger… for Henry Kissinger himself (who looks baffled). But, for the most part, we get footage of Al as Saddam at a USO function, Al on a book tour, Al at the Republican Convention, and Al on the radio.

    As the film progresses, and begins to address its much more serious task of revealing the future Senatorial candidate, difficult questions begin to arise. Al Franken stands for… what? He certainly hates Bill O’Reilly, and God Spoke does a stellar job of giving that loathsome creature ammunition. In fact, it makes you wonder if, in the interest of being fair, the filmmakers gave O’Reilly, Hannity, and Coulter some choice barbs against Franken and left our hero looking flustered. In debates the guy starts slamming his fist on desks, demanding apologies, performing his jujitsu (as he calls it) by tossing out a barrage of facts that he can barely articulate without rambling. But the film succeeds only in making him sound like the aforementioned Al Gore . Which is not a good thing.

    So Mr. Franken has a strong position on… what? Al Franken hates the right-wing pundits. So do a lot of us, but here’s some news: Norm Coleman is not a right-wing pundit. In fact, like it or not, Coleman is doing a moderately decent job of not appearing to be entirely in the President’s front pocket (as opposed to Mark Kennedy, who is doing a lovely job of sailing his ship into icebergs) and will make a formidable candidate in the next election. We know Franken hates Bush, and dislikes Republicans. Is this enough? Is it enough that Coleman is a jerk, a whiny bastard who only sits in his Senate office because of the death of the beloved Wellstone? That’s lousy, sure, but why would Joe Schmoe vote for Al Franken? Why would anyone in a primary against legitimate Democratic candidates? Because he hates Coleman more than anyone and has a radio show? That’s hardly enough.

    In God Spoke, Franken and company exist high in the political stratosphere. We see him schmoozing at the Capital City Grille, hanging out with Hillary Clinton, making senators laugh, drinking wine in Newsweek’s wine cellar (who knew?) and being on the air with Michael Moore. We learn that his parents were staunch Republicans who became staunch Democrats when Barry Goldwater was the nominee in ’64. They did so because of Goldwater’s refusal to support the Civil Rights movement. It is interesting that, for a guy who brings this up as often as Al does, he is surrounded almost entirely (if not entirely) by whites… and if this were a film about, say, Norm Coleman, we’d certainly be braying about his ‘lily-white’ entourage.

    Al Franken believes passionately about… what? The movie never really says. He is a comedian, a smart man, and a pundit. He has a crack staff of fact-checkers that put the right-wingers to shame. But does he have a history of public service? What does he think about education? About Iraq? About terrorism, health care, you name it. It’s not enough to just assume that there are left-wing answers to these concerns and that Al Franken is a better man than Norm at addressing these issues. Will the guy actually do his job? Introduce legislation? Or will he just gripe all the time… kind of like he does right now.

    So what does Al Franken believe? Perhaps Al Franken believes that he is the liberal response to the Republican’s Hollywood onslaught. Maybe he sees that the right has successfully co-opted the movies and politics, giving us the right honorable Ronald Wilson Reagan in the performance of a lifetime, and now A. Schwarzenegger as the California Gov. They’ve raised the curtains on Fred Dalton Thompson and Fred Grandy (oddly enough, both guys are from Tennessee). Conservatives have learned the lessons from the media, from television and radio and the movies; now perhaps we have learned and are serving up a likeable face of our own.

    But is this a good thing? Is it enough to simply detest a candidate and be amused by another? Isn’t it better to feel as though your man or woman has a vision, like Wellstone’s, someone utterly comfortable wandering amongst the crowds, maybe even someone who’s accomplished more than just acting like Stuart Smalley and barking into a microphone. Even if his facts are correct.

    So when watching Al Franken: God Spoke it’s entirely fair to wonder just what Al Franken stands for as a candidate. And then to ask: can’t we do better than this?

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  • Children Of The Damned

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    I was trying to remember where I’d seen the guy before, and it was driving me crazy. I had an image in my head, but I couldn’t quite find the proper context.

    Was he the sullen waiter with the black eye who’d recently served me at that awful new Italian restaurant in St. Louis Park? Or was he the bass player in Jews in Orbit, the band that had played a friend’s wedding reception back in July?

    I decided he was the Jews in Orbit guy. I was almost certain.

    Resolve is what’s called for here, I heard him say. It was clear from his deadpan delivery that he was being ironic.

    The youngster at his side confessed that he didn’t understand the meaning of resolve. In his mind, he said, he pictured a television advertisement for…what was it? A laundry detergent?

    The other fellow –a still youngish man, some kind of father, I suppose, but it was obvious to even the boy that he was in way over his head– said, Steely resolve. You need to learn to exercise some self control, to check your desires.

    It’s my money, the boy said.

    The man shook his head sadly and continued to flip through the racks of CDs. He was wearing a dirty Boston Red Sox cap, a tattered Feelies tee-shirt, long, baggy shorts, and flip-flops. At no time during this brief exchange had he diverted his attention from his browsing. He didn’t so much as look in the direction of the boy who was bouncing anxiously at his side.

    The boy had thick black eyeglasses and an unruly head of brown curly hair. It’s my money, he said again. I want to buy this Iron Maiden CD.

    The man finally turned and addressed the boy directly.

    I want you to understand this, he said, placing his hands on the boy’s shoulders. Are you listening to me? If you buy that Iron Maiden CD I can guarantee you that there will come a day in the not so distant future when you’re going to feel very, very stupid. Do you understand what I’m saying? That is a guarantee.

    It’s my money, the boy said.

    The man snatched the disc from the boy’s hands, shoved it back in the rack, and resumed flipping through the CDs.

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  • Mel Gibson and the Pants

    The seed of what follows was planted yesterday, when I blogged, in passing, about the band Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin. Pretty cool name for a band, huh? And there’s more where that came from in today’s concert listings: Mel Gibson and the Pants. The latter of these plays the Nomad this eve. But what I’m more interested in, at this moment, is plumbing the depths of my (our?) fascination with band names that reference famous peeps? Reiner Maria is a favorite example, of course, if only because the band refers back to a poet I obsessed over in my younger years. And I bet more than one of us is thinking of the Dead Kennedys. Then there’s this other thing: On the way into work yesterday my mind wandered, for whatever reason, to an old bluesy local band called Wallace Hartley (named after the dude who rocked the Titanic). A stranger example: my buddy Matt Foust (better known as one-quarter of the Love-Cars) was once in a Beloit College band called Willis Smoked a Guy–an obvious reference to Diff’rent Strokes star-gone-wrong Todd Bridges. What to make of this? In cases such as Reiner Maria, the band name means reverence. In others–Mel Gibson and the Pants–it’s something of a gag. But, can an unknown band ride the wave of someone else’s name recognition? And what of the bands who took their names from famous somebodies who later faded from the consciousness or went out of fashion? Smart or dumb move? Hmmmmm.

  • Doggin'

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    here puppy, puppy

    I’m surprisingly OK with the upscaling/gourmandizing/Starbucking of the hot dog.

    Because once we get through lauding the foie dog, the salmon dog, the wasabi coated tuna dog, the kobe dog, the tofu dog or whatever they decide to come up with, there will be a backlash. All of a sudden classic hot dogs will be chic again. It’s even possible that we may see a resurgence of the corner doggery, a stand or tiny joint that serves nothing but juicy, salty hot dogs and maybe a nice batch of fries.

  • Monday, Monday…

    I don’t know… what’s going on today? It’s raining. Dave Barry‘s in town. Corey Flintoff, too. At the Nomad: Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin–which is a great band name! Anyone read that profile of former president Clinton in last week’s New Yorker? Turns out, Clinton loves Yeltsin, too. In any case, I heard ’em on The Current for the first time yesterday, and that was aw’right.

  • Monday

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    There are such beautiful stories tucked away in even the quietest, most settled lives.

    Maybe people today don’t have the kind of access to memory that folks seemed to have in previous generations. The whiz-bangery of this world crowds out the wonder, and makes it hard to have, or recognize, singular experiences for what they are.

    All that bright spectacle and noise pounding away at everyone from all sides, and so much desire, so many commonplace marvels to take for granted, that I suppose it’s rarer all the time for anyone to feel like they’re ever truly and actively in the moment.

    We live surrounded, and even when we’re alone we’re distracted, occupied by passive entertainment, and lonely.

    Still, people do stumble into moments of grace or pure magic, and sometimes they can’t help but be momentarily startled out of their lives.

    That’s the sort of thing that used to happen all the time.

    I have a journal in my great-grandfather’s hand in which he recounts his rural childhood in the days before electrification. He writes of venturing out on Christmas Eve and walking down the long driveway of the family farm. He and his siblings would stand in the middle of the dirt road, surrounded by the snow-swept countryside, and they would listen to the church bells ringing out from the little towns that were scattered throughout the dark fields in every direction.

  • Chick's too young to fry…

    What I’d do this weekend if I wasn’t going to the North Shore (I go begrudgingly… its hard to pull me away from the city I love in the thick of fall arts season): Kid Dakota at the Turf, Lit 6 at the Ritz, Osmo at Harreit.

    Oh, and I’m ‘sposed to say there’s going to be a giant fish fry and half-way to St. Patrick’s day party at Keegan’s this weekend. Supposedly, on Saturday, they’re going to fry the world’s biggest piece of cod or something.

    And if there must be a daytrip, a group of potters and ceramicists will be hawking their wares just outside of Hudson, Wisconsin this weekend. I actually went to the Rustic Road Pottery Sale a few years back, and had a fun time watching them all fire their pots with shredded newspaper and garbage cans. I still have nightmares about the red-hot pot in its kiln–which I spotted just outside the ole’ farmstead’s garage. Several children got awfully close. Yikes! (Note: Click on that link and you’ll find the info in the left margin.)

    Also: If you’re looking for a theater production to go see; I recommend Foxfire, which I saw at Theatre In The Round last Sunday. After seeing several disappointing productions on the previous three evenings, this show came as a welcome, relaxing surprise.

  • Conversations Real and Imagined: The Subtle Psychopath Jimmy Stewart

    Winchester ’73, 1950. Directed by Anthony Mann, written by Borden Chase and Robert L. Richards. Starring James Stewart, Millard Mitchell (guy looks just like my Grandpa Schilling), Shelley Winters, Dan Duryea, Stephen McNally, John McIntire and both Rock Hudson and Tony Curtis in small, unrecognizable roles.

    Note: Circumstances prevented me from attending last evening’s Blue Dahlia preview. Winchester ’73 plays Saturday, September 16 at 7:00pm and Sunday, September 17 at 5:00pm on Turner Classic Movies.

    Everybody loved Jimmy. Loved the way he waved at you from his front porch, washed his car regularly, kept his lawn mowed. You could see him at dusk, walking the streets, a neighborhood-watch thing. At times I heard a couple of punks chuckle that the old man couldn’t do much, but they were tame with him around. The guy had four sweet kids and a wife, loved his dogs but always petted your cats. I know that ‘way back in the day he tried to be an architect but watched the Depression eat that dream right up. Fought in the big war, really fought too, a pilot. That meant seeing a lot nasty things. Didn’t seem to bother him, really, though you could see something simmering behind his eyes. He lived a long time, even scratched out a collection of poems that’s still thumbed through in nursing homes around the country. Like I said, a great guy.

    But if you sat with him for awhile, you’d hear some stories. And I mean stories–not just some garbage about how he could get a square meal for a quarter back in the day, but stories that, well, a couple of times they had my hair up on end.

    Like the time he was Lin McAdam in Winchester ’73. That Lin, boy, the guy could shoot. Shoot rifles or Colts, with a speed and accuracy that suggested he hadn’t just fired at cans on a post. His cowboy hat wasn’t a community theater prop, it had a jagged ring of sweat around its band, and it wouldn’t fit any but the head of the man that wore it on long rides through the west. You ask him: Had he killed a man? Jimmy would keep talking, saying “Well, now…” He’d been shot at, been beaten nearly to death, had arrows pierce his saddle, but… and here’s a laugh, he was never thrown from a horse. Horses, Anthony Mann once said, seem to take to Jimmy. They’d turn and look for him when they heard his voice, like they wanted him near.

    In Winchester ’73 Lin came into town looking for his brother and found a celebration: a shooting contest, the winner won a Winchester ’73. That magnificent rifle, one in ten thousand they said! Gave one to the President, even. When Lin came to town he was really looking for his brother. And if it hadn’t been for Earp, who took everybody’s guns, it would’ve ended right there, with either him or Dutch–Mike was his real name, the one their father gave him–dead. Shot through the heart, quick. One shot would’ve done it: both brothers could hit a sparrow’s forehead at a hundred yards. They learned the skill from their father, but Dutch used it to rob stagecoaches and eventually to murder their old man. So they just circled one another until the contest started, which, of course, Lin won. But he never got a chance to fire the thing, as that brother, Dutch, and his henchmen beat the tar out of Lin and took it from him.

    But had he killed a man? Jimmy would smile and recall the heat, the heat… it was unbearable, and those little watering holes, oh boy, they were like ovens. What was the place–and Jimmy would do that thing, snapping his fingers flaccidly, silently–oh, yeah, Riker’s Hotel & Bar. Made that place for the film, and it looked like Bud, one of the set designers, painted the sign while he was drunk. The colored water they used as whisky was warm as spit, but the coffee was actually ice cold water. Once, Jimmy thought he and Millard were going to die from the heat and the food. Heat like that and they serve piping hot bowls of Mann’s famous chili. That’s not wise, its just not wise.

    Jimmy enjoyed remembering that place, even if it was the spot that Dutch had that Winchester taken from his character Lin, first by an Indian trader played by the great character actor John McIntire. Cheated dumb Dutch out of it in a card game. Then Little Bull killed John, the gun trader, and took it himself. When Little Bull and his men were slaughtered by the cavalry, the gun went to that coward, Steve, the one in the movie who’s engaged to Shelley Winters. But Steve’s yellow and he knew it, so it wasn’t any trouble for Waco Johnny Dean to kill Steve and take the Winchester and kidnap his girl to boot. Then, what do you know, Waco joins Dutch in a robbery, and gives the gun to the bastard to keep them from killing one another, and the circle was complete. Dutch has the damn thing in his grubby hands again. But it was never about the gun, Jimmy said. No, it was never about the gun.

    But had he killed a man? Well, Waco was played by Dan Duryea, who always seemed a bit half cocked in real life. Jimmy laughed at the thought: you never knew what he was going to do, but he was a swell guy. A guy like that would have played nothing but a serial-killer nowadays. Thinking back, Duryea could seethe, too, like he’d seen too much in the world to trust even a hearty laugh. He really filled that role out, that Waco Johnny. Waco Johnny Dean. The way he looked down at Jimmy’s Lin McAdams, eager, and poured that whisky like it was nothing to having a drink and shooting a man down. And when Lin took Duryea’s arm and bent it, he bent it back hard, why, you’d squirm in your seat and stretch your own arm because it looked like it hurt like hell. And his face… Jesus. Lin looks like he’s really going to break Duryea’s arm. When it’s done old Dan, Waco Johnny Dean, he looked like he really wanted to pop Jimmy’s Lin across the chops, whether it’s in the script or not. Telling the story, Jimmy catches himself, because he’s a bit out of breath. Maybe he relished twisting poor Dan’s arm just a bit too much. Maybe he understood Lin just a bit too much.

    Jimmy talked about chasing Dutch into the mountains, of him and McNally, who played Dutch, hauling after each other while they dragged cameras around that God-forsaken wasteland. It was brutal. They were thirsty but they didn’t take a drop of water ’til it was over. And when it was over–and Lin shot his brother down–he just hung his head down. No words, no gloating. Nothing but the job’s done, and he wished it hadn’t ever have happened. Then he walks into town and the whole thing’s over. Just like that.

    He was a sweet old fellow, that Jimmy, as nice a man as you could ever hope to find. But he didn’t use his kindness to shield cowardice, or shallowness, or a simple politeness at the expense of actually seeing the real world. Onscreen, the pain is evident in his face. The hate and frustration are boiling just under the surface. Don’t ever call Tom Hanks the new Jimmy around me–the boy’s just not tough enough to face himself like Jimmy could. Jimmy lived next door to all of us, but like all of us he read the papers, he saw friends die, knew injustice, and dreamed the strange hallucinations that make us all want to fly, or cry, or hide for the violence we might commit. Jimmy knew he was as capable of bumbling around with an invisible rabbit as he was of being a backstabbing bounty hunter or driving a woman much younger than him to suicide. Just like Lin McAdam. And George Bailey. And Scottie Ferguson. Nearly demented men, obsessively chasing something they know will warp them.

    Though you can see trace elements in Jimmy’s earlier pictures, it all began with Winchester ’73. All of the troubled Mann westerns and the crazy Hitchcock stuff started with Lin McAdam nearly breaking Dan Duryea’s arm, with Lin taking his brother down on a hot Arizona bluff.

    But did he ever kill a man? It’s nothing to brag about, Jimmy says, quietly. Try it once, even in a movie, and you’ll never get it out of your head.

  • Listen, Ruckert Said, This Is Serious

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    He said: This is a disappearing act for the ages, with a little of that all-the-king’s-horses-and-all-the-king’s-men business thrown in for good measure –although I should say that it never struck me as particularly surprising that horses wouldn’t be much good at putting things back together, lacking as they do opposable thumbs, not to mention hands.

    It’s bad, though, the place I find myself, he said –or, rather, wrote.

    This was on stationery from some Howard Johnson’s in Florida:

    I’m smeared all over the sidewalk, my brains sprung clean out of my broken skull, black birds picking throught the gore.

    Have you ever wondered what happens to the stuff that’s in your mind when your brains get bashed out? Does it evaporate like a gas? Or is it still all stashed away there in the leaking coils of meat? I don’t have any idea. I suppose I’m about to find out.

    Do me a huge favor and give me back my corner, my floor, the feeling of solid ground beneath my tangled feet.

    I’m waiting for another dog to answer my piss.

    Hey, wait, listen to this.

    What’s that you say? You don’t hear anything?

    That’s exactly my point.

    Anyway, here’s the thing, to get back to my original question: You can’t just stick a knitting needle into a pile of brains and say, There’s an idea.

    There’s a thought. There’s a memory.

    And there –right there— is a fucking dream.

    Was, if you know what I’m saying.

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