The Rake Magazine

Author: Christy DeSmith

  • Cover Your Heads

    Well, one highlight of the weekend was stopping by Anna Lee’s Ruby3
    trunkshow. As I mentioned previously, Ms. Lee is best known for her sculptural,
    showgirl-style hats, like this one, which she made of Big Bird feathers leftover from a production of Sesame Street Live:

     

    By the way, that’s the lovely Ms. Di Medlock of Electricoiffer
    demonstrating …

     

    Of course, these aren’t the most practical things-unless
    you find yourself invited to, say, a high-society British wedding. So, I was
    delighted to find the first of Lee’s Minnesota-friendly winter headdresses. Here, for example,
    is a very functional wrap:

     

    You can’t tell from the humdrum pic, but these are furry, rather outrageous things-statement pieces,
    if you will. But the best thing about ’em, if you ask me, is that the innards
    are made of fleece. No more pimply foreheads courtesy of an itchy collection of wool hats. I bought the blue one below. If you want your own, they’re available for purchase
    at the Design Collective.

     

  • Skirt Chasers

    My sporty friends, there is now an entire company dedicated
    to hawking athletic skorts. You’ll find ’em at www.skirtsports.com. The founder, so
    says the press release, is Nicole DeBoom, an Ironman champion who just so
    happens to be married to superstar triathlete Tim DeBoom. Anyhoo, wearing these
    polypro skirts can be a sport in and of itself, if you ask me. They cause quite a stir at the gym, for instance. When stretching in downward dog or
    climbing on the stationary bicycle, orbiting gym rats get to peek up your skirt,
    which is really no shorter than an ordinary pair of running shorts-but is much
    more effective in keeping ’em glued. What fun!

     

  • Dealios; Plus, Deep Thoughts on Gift-Buying

    More exciting news for all you patriots intent on fulfilling
    your duties as Americans this holiday shopping season:

    Ensemble (2812
    W. 43rd St.    , Minneapolis    ).
    A modest boutique inspiring immodest desires. Ensemble hosts its annual holiday
    shopping party on Thursday from God-knows-when till about, oh, about 8 p.m. That’s
    when you’ll get fifteen-percent off. Promised goods include new laptop bags by
    the Minneapolis-based Urban Junket (see below). You know, I’ve been meaning to tell you:
    These bags are pretty fabs. I only wish I had enough coin to replace the ole Timbuktu.

    Textile
    Center     (3000 University Ave. SE, Suite 100, Minneapolis). If whimsy is what
    you’re after—but not necessarily of the red-hat ladies sort—then go to the
    Textile Center, where they’re having a holiday show and sale through December
    29, for heaven’s sake, people.

     

    Ruby3.Whenever and wherever there’s an event celebrating our local
    fashion mindustry, there’s one character
    certain to be in attendance: Ms. Anna Lee. As producer of the momentous annual
    Voltage Fashion Amplified show and founder of the fledgling mnFashion service
    organization, Lee is a reliable source of support for local designers. Not
    everyone knows it, but she’s a designer, too—of hats! Those familiar
    with her millinery know her by the flamboyant, showgirl-style headdresses. But now
    she’s unveiling an assortment of wearable winter hats, too. Get yo’ sneaks on Saturday,
    December 8 between 5 and 10 p.m. at the studio of my favorite local fashion
    photographer, Nic Marshall (2303
    Kennedy St. NE    , Studio 402, Minneapolis). I’ll be there with the Elph to
    snap up the snaz, ya digs?

     

    Now, here’s a thought: Does anyone else know
    the sort of person who loves shopping so much she actually tries to do yours,
    too? My mom called me this week to let me know she’d found two things my kid
    brother might like: A coat rack in the form of deer antlers and a checkered barstool—“perfect
    for the garage,” she said. Now, did I, she wondered, want her to purchase these
    items on my behalf? She’d already gone over her spending limit. “No,” I
    responded huffily. I’d already picked out the perfect gift—a reasonably
    fashionable Ski-Do racing jersey—and I’d done so on my own accord, with sentiment and personal knowledge of my brother’s likes and dislikes. “Mom,” I said,
    summoning the Valley Girl within. And then I clicked my tongue as hard as I could.
    “That’s not what Christmas is all about.”

  • Fashion That Gives Warm Fuzzies

    More eye candy from my fave local fashion photographer, Nic
    Marshall    . These latest pics were styled by the ladies of Eclecticoiffeur. The
    model, I hear, is from Vision. Don’t you just lurve the eye-popping color? I, for one, also like the bucolic backdrops—even if they are reminiscent of
    the much loathed Anthropologie catalogue.

  • Shopping for Girly-Men

     

     

    Cufflinks, fire of the wrist bone. And they make for decent
    stocking stuffers, too. The shop girl at Via’s worried whether these would be
    too “jewel-y” for the heterosexual on my shopping list. But I assured her these would go to the girliest manly-man on the planet, my mop-headed boyfriend.
    The cufflinks he wanted (from Neiman Marcus) were out of my price range ($750).
    So, I went for these at Via’s Vintage Wear. They were only $40. The store had
    an adequate selection, including a vintage pair from Harrod’s, whereas the
    other stores I visited had none.

     

  • Superfood Sucks

    First, a preface: I am not a foodie. The blander the better.
    Nourishment, for me, is achieved by daily ingestions of oatmeal and honey,
    cinnamon-raisin bagels with peanut butter, salted popcorn, and, as of late,
    Odwalla Bars. I’ve enjoyed these very much because, well, they’ve made it easy
    on me—“No Refined Sugars,” say the labels. And I’m very careful about this. Diabetes
    runs rampant in my family—even among the skinny people—so I’m trying to trick
    fate by avoiding refined sugars whenever possible. In any case, the “Power
    Protein” and “Berries GoMega” Odwalla flavors have been plenty pleasing. But I
    was horrified, just now, by my first bite of a “Superfood”-flavored Odwalla Bar,
    which is loaded with Spirulina and banana flakes. It tasted like a cross
    between seaweed and lake water! Spit! Ptchu! Yech!

  • Dress Rage

    Oh, and this other thing: What. the. hell. is with this year’s
    selection of holiday dresses? The New York Times ran a piece this morning,
    alleging that the year’s holiday dresses are better tailored than last year’s and, again, that the "baby-doll dress is dead."
    But everyone I go, I am confronted by ads of ugly, sack-like frocks cut from
    the decidedly un-friendly to shapelessness fabrics of satin and silk. Every
    time I pick up the November 22 issue of the New Yorker (cue eye-rolling, please) I am confronted by the back cover Banana Republic ad in which a
    woman wears a rather tent-like silk halter dress. (This here’s the one.) Of course, none
    of it much applies in Minnesota,
    where we’d have to be crazy to venture out-of-doors with exposed shoulders this
    time of year.

    Related to this: I had been a big, big fan of the latest Go
    International     line by Erin Fetherston, what with all its adorable tiered
    dresses and Peter Pan collars. But that was before I spotted two of the silk
    ones on the racks at Salvation Army last night. These were wrinkled to beat
    hell. And I doubt I could prevent similar such messes—what with the madcap lifestyle.
    However, I wouldn’t mind owning this chiffon bunny dress. It’s delightful.

  • Reasonably Promising Shopping Events

    For the women on your shopping list: You might have luck at
    these two shopping events. First off, there’s No Coast Craft-O-Rama at Midtown
    Global Market. I was cruising the list of vendors and was happy to spot all
    sorts of great local jewelry-, clothing-, and crafts-makers as well as the clothing/ephemera
    designer with the best-ever name, Too Many Suitors. It’s worth noting, however:
    I suspect you’ll have better luck at this event if you’re searching for buying
    for women.

    In that vein, clothing designer Joynoelle is teaming up with
    Penny Larsen and Apiary Design to host an event in which you can
    design-to-order you own hats, jewelry, stationery, and such. The aesthetic
    here, I suspect, will be very “ornamental girlie.” So the schedule goes: On Friday
    (tomorrow), from four to eight p.m., there’ll be free wine and snacks; on
    Saturday, from ten a.m. to 4 p.m., there’ll be free cider and cookies. (312 W. 42nd St. Minneapolis; 612-209-7822)

    All kinds of other shit is going on, but I’m not sure how
    exciting it is to read about them in this format. Truth be told, I’m just salty
    about having finished shopping for all the women on my list. Now, all I have
    left are the no-fun guys. Trolling various motor sports websites for reasonably
    fashionable Ski-Doo T-shirts (for the kid brother in Brahm, Minnesota)—that
    is what my life has become. So far, I haven’t had any luck. Surprise, surprise.

  • Another Reason Beowulf Blows

    By now, it’s fairly well established that Beowulf is an irredeemable,
    gawd-awful film. As if moviegoers needed another reason to hate the thing, I
    noticed something truly heinous about the animation: While the male characters were rendered in the
    spirit of realism, left with fairly expressive human faces, the female characters
    were idealized to the point of looking like wax figures. Did you notice the
    constipated quality about Queen Wealthow’s face whenever she tried,
    unsuccessfully, to crinkle her nose or furrow her brow? The filmmakers,
    apparently, are terrified of the lines that form on a beautiful, young woman’s face whenever she,
    you know, expresses herself. Sure, by the end of the movie they’ve tossed a few
    crowsfeet onto Wealthow’s mug, but that’s only to point out how she’s
    no longer fuckable.

  • Fashions From Afar

     

     

    Our former editorial assistant, the lovely Ms. Laura Puckett, returned from
    her Fulbright-funded year in Mongolia
    recently. Yesterday she stopped by the office to show off these boots, a
    traditional Mongol variety often worn, she said, to horse races and such. Of
    course, the soles are made of leather, and so young Laura must have rubber
    added before she can wear them. (I suggested Fast Eddie’s Shoe Repair, in
    Dinkytown.) Also, it’s worth noting that the curled toebox reflects a tradition
    of respecting the earth; it doesn’t leave such an aggressive footprint, in any
    case.