Author: Chris Birt

  • Mustang Strippers From Mars

    A while back, my editor informed me that blog readers enjoy hearing about the author’s personal life. While I remain suspicious about this online axiom, I will admit that I read car magazines. I peruse so many car magazines and sites in a week that it leaves little time for discretion. Because of this, I…

  • In Thrust I Trust (Again)

    Bonding. Its something that women tend to fret about with men, as in "go and do your male bonding thing." While I am sure men like me are essentially Pavlovian and conditioned to do what women say, it gets more complicated when I think about cars. I don’t need to bond with my buddies, but…

  • Subaru, Turducken, and Other Strange Birds

    A long time ago I was fired from the Byerly’s business (and later restated) for taking a picture of a model holding a Turducken. I depicted this Scandinavian babe in a Bergmanesque pose tortured by existential angst over what to do with the strange aviary object. Tres Lund, apparently, did not prefer realism in his…

  • Nature Porn

    Here’s a lil’ sumpin for you nature lovers. Urbanolas. Gore Gurls. Whatever you call yourself. Until this year, all Jeep vehicles were "trail-rated". This has required all vehicles to finish the Rubicon Trail–the most muderous off-road route on the planet (see image). From a design perspective this requires a ladder frame and a solid rear…

  • The New Mini. A Maximum Bummer.

    I have driven the new Mini Cooper. So has half the British Press (the one that matters–Jeremy Clarkson in particular–he is the "dog’s bollocks.") The universal rap on the new car is that it has been "Americanized." In other words, the automotive equivalent of a nice hot casserole. Its a little bigger, the dashboard is…

  • Tripping the Road Fantastic

    Soon you may be heading off on a thanksgiving vacation. The trip may be short or it may be long. Unless your relations live next door, however, you will have to make that journey in an automobile. These days that will likely mean a minivan or small European "touring wagon" (which Chrysler attempted to call…