Year: 2007

  • FM 107's Kevyn Burger Begins Her Fight

    In an open letter to friends and colleagues, Kevyn Burger, mid-morning host at FM 107 and, as I’ve said for two decades, one of the great gals/babes of the Twin Cities, announced she has breast cancer and will undergo aggressive treatment beginning this weekend. A reporter at KSTP-TV and then WCCO-TV before settling into her present radio gig, Burger will return to the mic for an hour tomorrow morning, from 9 to 10 AM to discuss her situation, and then take an indefinite hiatus for surgery and chemo.

    FM 107 GM Dan Seeman says his plan is to find a regular fill-in, instead of cobbling together a cast of rotating hosts. He hasn’t yet decided who that will be.

    I don’t want to go all maudlin here, because Kevyn wouldn’t relate to it or approve. But a big part of her charm has always been her “player” attitude. (Which explains why she ranks high as a “guy gal”.) She understands the media game, has played it well with her own unique style and continues to survive with dignity intact. Not everyone can say that.

    Hang tough, Kevyn.

    (Her message is attached inside.)

    Hello friends,
    I am sorry to be contacting you as part of a group e mail. Trust me, I would prefer to tell each one of you the news that I am about to impart over a walk, or coffee, or a glass of wine. However, I simply can’t bring myself to dial each one of of you to deliver this news personally.
    Those of you who worked with me in news know I was never one to bury a lede. So here is is:

    I have been diagnosed with breast cancer.

    I had a routine screening mammogram they day after I did the Walk for the Cure. I expected to get that ‘see ya next year’ postcard in the mail. Instead, a call, the need for another look, the need for an ultrasound, the need for a needle biopsy.
    And the confirmation of the diagnosis: invasive ductal carcinoma. In two places.
    The good news is that this cancer has not moved to my liver, bones or lungs.
    The bad news is that I actually have two lumps and they are periolously near my lymph nodes.
    So, I am scheduled for surgery at the soonest possible date. I will have a full mastectomy on June 2 at 9:30 a.m. This will be followed by immediate reconstruction. I will recover for a few days at Abbott Northwestern, then come home, recover some more, and begin preparing for chemotherapy and then radiation.
    I am still stunned. My favorite band Atmosphere has a line in their song ‘That Night’ that goes ‘This sort of real doesn’t happen to you, right?’ and that may best describe my feelings.
    It has been a long and crazily distorted time, as I have waited for the conclusive information to arrive. I’ve already seen an array of specialists and undergone a series of pokes and prods. Basically, I have now used up my share of the health care budget for the rest of my life…and about half of yours, as well.
    Once again, the good news-bad news scenario. This will not kill me. (That’s the good news.) The bad news is the fear and misery that will be my companion in the coming months.That I have to say goodbye to my breast and my self-image as a person with an almost super-human immune system. That I am going to have to learn how to be vulnerable and how to ask for help.
    All of these challenges frighten me very much. I am being pulled out of my comfort zone and may never be able to return.
    I am blessed to have a gutsy and loyal husband, a loving family and dear and devoted friends. I will have to rely on each of you in ways we can’t now imagine.
    Please do not call me right now. I need to keep my strength and focus. Please do not send large and extravagent arrangements of flowers to the hospital. They always remind me of funerals and that is the last thing I want to think of. Please pray for me and for my family and please be strong for all of us.
    A hard lump of fear is wedged in my middle and nothing can make it dissolve until the surgery is complete. I know many of you feel it with me. Still I am optimistic. I know I have a lot of fight in me and I will give my all to this struggle. Since the diagnosis, I was riding my bike on a beautiful spring day, these words came to me:
    “My fear is strong, but my faith is stronger.”
    It is. It truly is. And the faith that you have in me is such a big part of that.
    I will soon have a website to communicate with all of you and give you updates. In the meantime, a small request: actively think of me every time you cross the river. Don’t forget to admire how that ribbon of water is on a journey. Notice how the ricer shines; think of how the water seeks the sea. Think of how I’m working to heal…and send me your thoughts, prayers and best wishes as you cross between the banks. My body and soul feel somewhere floating in between right now, working hard to rejoin you on the solid ground of the banks. Wave to me. Beckon me back to the land of the fully alive. I’ll be there with you again…soon.

    With love,
    Kevyn

    PS This news is not a secret. Feel free to share this information with anyone who needs it.

    My son has helped me set up a blog.
    http://kevynbaby.blogspot.com
    It will also be available on the fm107 website. This may be the best way to communicate with me for the time being

  • Impale This

    FILM
    Fearless Filmmakers Premiere: Impaler

    Impaler.jpgNo third party candidate for governor in this country has ever garnered as much media attention as Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey did in his race for Minnesota governor just a little over a year ago. It wasn’t his quest to help farmers or improve the public school system that earned him the fame — nor any specific facet of his 13-point platform. In fact, the attention he received had nothing to do with his political agenda — at least not directly. But when you announce to the media that you’re a Hecate witch, a Satanic priest, a sanguaryan vampyre — that tends to get their attention. And this is just what Sharkey did. Relive the experience, dig a little deeper into the Sharkey’s campaign, see the results of his macabre proclamations, and witness the heartbreaking events that ensued. Tonight is the premiere of W. Trey White’s Impaler, an 8-month long documentary on the subject, followed by a question and answer session with White and Sharkey. That’s right, folks. You still got questions? Ask the man for yourself. Sharkey has made plenty more announcements since the completion of the documentary, including his candidacy for president, his promise to impale George Bush if elected, and a threat to impale the White at this screening if the film mocks him in any way. Don’t you just have to see what happens? Head on over to the after party at Stub and Herbs following the screening.

    7:30 p.m., Oak Street Cinema, 309 Oak Street SE, Minneapolis; 612-331-3134; $9 ($7 students, $5 MN Film Arts members).

    Two More Premieres

    raidersguys.jpgI think we’ve pretty much proven that we do indeed have a healthy local film community here. But it gets even better than that. It’s not just the adults now. Today and tomorrow, two films by young filmmakers will make their Minnesota debut. This afternoon’s screening is Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation — a shot-for-shot remake of the original movie, made by 10-year-old Chris Strompolos and 11-year-old Eric Zala. These two boys saw the film as kids and became obsessed with Indiana Jones. Over the next seven years, from 1982 to 1989, Chris and Eric worked on the movie during school holidays, saving their pocket money for props and asking for bullwhips, spray-paint, and a VHS camcorder for Christmas and birthdays. Upon seeing the film Steven Spielberg invited Chris and Eric to meet with him and deemed their film one of the most moving things he’d ever seen. The film will play again tomorrow night, along with Songbird, a six-minute short film made by 27-year-old Minnesota native John Thompson. The film, shot in 8 frames-per-second (1/3 of the standard rate) for an unnatural, ethereal effect, is a “gothic tale about a trapped housewife who breaks free of her overbearing husband with a very dull meat cleaver.” The films will be followed by a question-and-answer session with the filmmakers.

    Today at 4 p.m. for children & teens-only, tomorrow at 7:30 p.m. for all, Minneapolis Central Library, 300 Nicollet Mall, Minneapolis MN; 612-630-6000 or 612-481-7345; $10 ($8 if you dress like Indiana Jones).

    MUSIC
    Music for all Tastes

    dino.jpgAs is often the case here in town, there is plenty of good music to choose from tonight. Alt-rock trio Dinosaur Jr. is playing at the Triple Rock Social Club. Fiddle-weilding Mexican-American songstress Carrie Rodriguez is playing at the Varsity Theater. Oh, she’s so fine. If you’re a fan of June Carter Cash, Lucinda Williams, or any folksy female vocalist with a bit of twang, you’ll enjoy this show. Looking for straight-up jazz? You can’t go wrong with local nu-jazz group Sambo Makti at the Nomad World Pub this evening with Atlantis Quartet. And, well, if you just want some standard Minnesota fare, you can always just head over to Bunker’s for the GB Leighton show.

    THEATER & PERFORMANCE
    Mental Illness Got You Down?

    RG_A2.jpgWorld-renowned performance/recording artist, poet, social activist and a hip-hop artist Rha Goddess brings her one-woman show to Minneapolis. Low, written and performed by Rha Goddess and directed by Chay Yew, is a multidisciplinary theatre piece that explores the mythology, stigma, fear, and confusion surrounding mental illness. The title of the show refers both to its main character, Lowquesha, and to the way she feels. Low, a budding poet, grows from a bright, happy and creative young girl to a troubled teenager who quickly descends into homelessness, addiction, and a frightening psychosis. Her arduous journey gives voice to those who strive for dignity and self-possession even as the painful descent into madness takes over. The show opens this evening and continues through June 16.

    7:30 p.m., Pillsbury House Theatre, 3501 Chicago Ave. S., Minneapolis; 612-825-0459; $18 (tonight’s performance is pay-what-you-can).

    BOOKS AND FOOD
    French Women Don’t Get Fat

    Tonight’s Let’s Cook book club meeting has been rescheduled for June 4th, but that now gives you time to get the book and go prepared. Enjoy an evening of fun and food. Each month the book club reads a different book and enjoys a dessert inspired by the reading over a lively discussion. This month’s reading is French Women Don’t Get Fat: The Secret of Eating for Pleasure by Mireille Guiliano. Forget all your worries about what not to eat. Focus on the positive. What can you eat? Go out and get the book today.

    June 4th at 7 p.m., Let’s Cook, 330 East Hennepin Ave., Minneapolis; 612-623-9700; $15.00.

  • Twins Diablog: After Memorial Day Edition

    On April Fools Day, I convened two of the smartest diamond watchers I know, The Rake’s own Brad Zellar (of Warning Track Power) and veteran Twin Cities journalist David Brauer for a Twins diablog. You can go back and find it in the archives or take my word that it was absolutely the most prescient slab of baseball wisdom delivered this calendar year (you should probably check). Anyway, hyperbole aside, the conversation did go well enough that I am making good on my threat to repeat it. What follows is a three-round hash, written between the afternoons of Monday May 28 and Tuesday May 29.

    Britt Robson

    What do Tony Batista, Juan Castro, Sidney Ponson, and Ramon Ortiz have in common? As any Twins fan can tell you, they all fall somewhere between “very suspect” and “washed-up” vets upon whom the Twins have unwisely gambled their past two springs. What’s especially concerning about this is that even casual fans foresaw the collapse of this quartet–it was a too-obvious reach on the part of GM Terry Ryan. (Full disclosure: I was so infatuated with Ryan’s acumen for judging talent that I was one of the precious few either defending his choices or suspending judgment on that hapless quartet the past two preseasons.)

    I suppose the counter-argument is “no harm, no foul,” in that Ryan’s Twins won the division last year and appear to be rounding into shape in time to contend this season. But that’s twice the club has pissed away two months before acknowledging what most everyone could have predicted.

    Is this simply to save money? The longer the Sloweys and Garzas of the world stay on the farm, the longer they wait for arbitration and free agency. Would Ryan, Pohlad and company be so cynical as to stagger their tenures so that if, say, Santana, prices himself out of the market they will have other aces-in-waiting for two or three years rather than one or two? And, if the cheap vets don’t pan out early and they stock from the farm system, it quells talk of going out and getting a bat or an arm for the pennant race in midseason. To choose two examples: Is Craig Wilson really so washed up that this ballclub shouldn’t take a chance on him? Seems to me he’s an ideal American League DH. I guess the fact that no one else has bitten on his services indicates his ability fell off the table–he had 29 homers in ’04 and is only 30. Second, with the Reds starters getting regally hammered–the Pirates, of all teams, put away all three games in the first inning over the weekend–and with ex-Twins assistant GM Wayne Krivsky now running the Reds, couldn’t we dangle Scott Baker or Carlos Silva for Edwin Encarnacion, who they actually sent to the minors last month, or Ryan Freel? EE is apparently a lousy fielder, but there’s no reason he could fill some kind of 3B/DH platoon with Jeff Cirillo and let Nick Punto become the super utility man he was born to be. Freel is in an even better fit, a guy who can play anywhere but most often at 3B and CF, a pair of holes for this ballclub if they don’t sign Torii Hunter at the end of this season. (Because if you’re a minor league stat reader, you know Denard Spann is a loooong way from ready.)

    A few other passing comments before I pass the baton to you two. Is Torii Hunter playing himself into a hometown discounted $40-45 million deal over the next three years? More 20/20 hindsight, but shouldn’t the Twins have locked up the MVP before the season started and he started proving that he’s only getting started on a string of quality seasons? Should the Twins think about moving Mauer to third and finding someone to platoon with Redmond, a pretty damn good catcher in his own right. Mauer’s height (big catchers don’t last), injury history and upside at the plate all make such a move at least worth considering. And is it time to call Jason Kubel a bust? (I think he is.)

    Don’t let these subjects limit you. If you’ve got something else on your mind, let it fly….

    David Brauer

    As the originator of the “wait to call up and delay arbitration year argument,” I’m willing to cut the Twins a bit of slack…at least on Garza. Sounds like we have a bit of a “ten-cent head” problem (see: Kubel, Jason) with Matt–if he is not listening to Rochester about mixing pitches, he deserves the delay. (As Crash Davis once said, “Don’t think, meat.”)

    Funny you should mention Krivsky: the Reds aren’t exactly thriving, are they? (As of this writing, they’re 19-33 and last in the Worst Division in Baseball. Also by the way, Zach Ward, the pitcher the Twins got for Lohse, is pitching at Ft. Myers and his record is identical to Lohse’s–2-6–though Ward has a 2.72 ERA.) One of the few correct predictions I made earlier this year was that of Silva, Ortiz and Ponson, one would work out–not a dangerous prediction, mind you, but even with Silva’s 4.22 ERA, I’ll notch it in pencil. I think with such uncertain starters, we’d be foolish to give up on Silva or Baker at this point, and Krivsky is unlikely to take our sloppy seconds; last year, he was in a pennant race; this year, not so much. If you figure on Garza, Slowey and Baker, two will work out, you still need Silva to contend, I think–the division is just that tough, and the sluggers Britt mentions are too one-dimensional or non-slugger enough for me to wait. (By the way, Freel was knocked unconscious today–not hurt seriously, but we’ll need concussion specialists to peer at those retinas.)

    Sadly for me, Souhan stole my proposed line-up from here on out: Castillo, Mauer in the two hole, Cuddy, MVP, Hunter. L-R-L-R 2-through-5, and concentrate the pain (both for the other team at the top of the order and us at the bottom). It sucks that Kubel has been so useless at the plate–though his glove is coming on–-but I’ve always believed in getting the best hitters the most at-bats, and DH, Kubel (or perhaps Tyner), Punto, Bartlett should be at the bottom. (Punto and Bartlett can flip.)

    Had you asked back in March, I would’ve said “Adios, Torii” with a heavy heart. With a glint of steel in my eye, I still feel that way now. He’s clearly a top-tier player, and will command much more than a three-year deal. (Watching Damon, you don’t think the Yanks will offer five?) I happen to feel the team’s top priorities are Santana and Morneau, and it will take every bit of coin to re-up them. I believe 32-year-old Torii will be increasingly injury-prone, exactly the sort of player the BoSox or Yanks can take a chance on, but we can’t. Santana could be the A-Rod of pitchers (financially, I mean), though we should discuss that ERA–I’m not sure what’s up. Lots of FA outfielders next year, though it’s silly to resist market price for the best guy and have to go bidding for his inferior. Would Santana re-sign if the ERA-reducing Hunter is gone?

    I of course hope the Twins either contend to the end or fall out hard so as to trade Torii for something. I’m fine if this is a developmental year…if you look at the starting fielders, sans Hunter and Castillo, this is still a young club, and the starters will be equally green (even Johan is only 28).

    While I was more or less right about Rincon’s submergence (opponents’ OPS is a hefty .737 this year, the third consecutive rise, up from .528 in ’04 and .575 in ’05, aka the Juice Years) I do have to doff my size-7 to Mr. Robson with his insistence that Cleveland was the team to beat. I never thought I’d see an AL Saves leader (Borowski) with an 6.75 ERA, but I’m obviously seeing the trees, not the forest. Oh, and even though Grady Sizemore looked like a turd for a few weeks back, his OPS stands at .858 (off last year’s pace by a little) and he’s hitting lefties and righties equally well. I wouldn’t trade him for the MVP, though (.954 OPS and rising).

    Brad Zellar

    The Twins already have a fair amount of money invested in Ortiz and
    Silva–something like $7.5 million dollars–so I don’t quite
    understand the whole economics angle as it applies to Garza et al. It
    just seems like a ridiculous gamble at this point. If the guy turns
    out to be good enough to justify a bank-breaking arbitration figure
    down the line, well, shit, good for the Twins.

    At this point–precisely *because* of guys like Batista, Ponson, and
    Ortiz–I’m against the team going out and trying to snag some
    reclamation project from another club. The Twins are good at finding
    and developing talent, but, with the exception of the occasional blip
    in the bullpen, they haven’t had a particularly good track record with
    nurturing comebacks or resurrecting careers. Somewhere down the line
    –maybe even later this year, if they fall way out of contention–
    it’s possible they’ll have to trade away some of those young arms for
    some offensive prospects, but I don’t think that time is now.

    Right now, and as we go forward, I think they have to worry about
    shoring up that bullpen and finding some serviceable warm bodies to
    eat up innings, and the obvious solution (given Ortiz’s salary and
    early success) is exactly what they’re apparently going to do: bring
    up Slowey and toss Ortiz to the bullpen to see if he can get some work
    in. If Silva slips again, I say push him to the pen as well and bring
    up Garza. The scuttlebutt about Garza quibbling about pitch selection
    in Rochester is much ado about nothing, I imagine. He was more than
    solid in his last outing, and if he’s struggling with pitch selection
    it seem to make more sense to have him up here working with the
    coaching staff and watching guys like Santana pitch.

    Like David I was agnostic about the Twins picking up Hunter’s option
    this year. I’m not going to gripe if he plays so well the team can no
    longer afford him. Somebody almost certainly is going to throw
    ridiculous dollars in his direction, and I don’t know if the Twins can
    or should try to play at those prices, whether Denard Spann is ready
    or not. Not that I have any other ideas, of course, but I’d love to
    see Terry Ryan be more active in making creative trades, and I still
    very much trust his judgment when it comes to young, unproven players.
    The problem is that he falls in love with his own so much that he can
    never seem to part with them.

    I still think Cleveland’s bullpen is going to bring the Indians a good
    deal of grief, although I’m willing to chalk that up to wishful
    thinking. And I still wouldn’t trade Morneau for Sizemore, although
    with the Hunter situation it would be mighty, mighty tempting.

    Also, I have to stress this: with all the injuries I really do believe
    the big concern right now is the bullpen, which has been getting worn
    out. The bottom line on Rincon is that he’s more or less been getting
    the job done, but it’s unlikely that he can just swap places with
    Neshek or Guerrier and gobble up middle innings. He may well be the
    next guy to go down with a bum arm; the early warning signs are all
    there.

    And I don’t agree that it’s time to give up on Kubel. The guy has come
    a long ways from that horrific injury, and at this point he sort of
    reminds me of where Cuddyer was at a few years ago. If the Twins are
    really interested in finding out whether or not he’s the real deal
    they need to throw him out there every day.

    Oh, and this: I’ve been obsessing about the batting order all season,
    and went into it yesterday on my blog. It seems both a shame and a sort of unfortunate recognition of the guy’s talents to suggest that Mauer should be batting second. He may be a three hitter somewhere down the line, but he’s not at the moment. And I also say screw the conventional wisdom (lefty-righty) and stack Mauer and Morneau back-to-back, and follow them with Cuddyer and Hunter. I just think it’s huge to get Morneau to the plate every day in the first inning, especially if Castillo and Mauer are going to be on the basepaths roughly 40% of the time.

    Britt Robson

    As always with you guys, a feast of food for thought and a chance for some arguments with smart people.

    This actually is a continuation of our preseason roundtable, where, unlike you two, I was more concerned about the offense than the pitching. Well, the Twins are currently 4th in the AL in ERA and tied for 7th in runs scored. Help is on the way in both places–Mauer is coming back and there’s Garza and Slowey in the minors–but even after the injurious trifecta of Crain, Reyes, and Perkins, and acknowledging the fact that the Twins’ ERA is currently its highest since 2003, I still see this squad falling short because of bats, not arms. Ever since the perpetually lamentable Dick Such was finally given his walking papers, the Twins have done a great job stitching together middle relief. Yeah, I’ll admit I hadn’t heard of any of
    the three guys they brought up to replace the injured wings, but after going to the extra-inning loss to the Blue Jays over the weekend, I’d have to say that both Cali and Miller looked fine (DePaulo isn’t ready, walking the only two batters he faced after yielding six to Texas in one inning previously), and they’ve got another lefty, Ricky Barrett, putting up good numbers for
    Rochester in Triple-A. Bottom line, Guerrier and Neshek had both shown enough for promotion before the injuries. These other guys, plus Ortiz in middle relief, can fill in until Reyes and Perkins return.

    That’s a hell of a lot easier to patch than figuring out how the Twins get better on offense. Rondell White? Kubel? Are you confident that Mauer stays healthy the rest of the year when he comes back on Friday? (And I repeat, should he remain behind the plate?) Ryan needs to be a little more proactive in bolstering his offense. What’s
    the harm in giving Craig Wilson a look? Is that really a bigger gamble than the ones he took on Ponson or Batista? And if not Wilson, one would think a right-handed hitter with a better potential OPS than Jeff Cirillo or Jason Tyner wouldn’t be that hard to come by. I’m willing to say that Jason Kubel will never be the hitter Michael Cuddyer is; just watching them both at similar points in their careers, Kubel seems more Terry Tiffee than Cuddyer to me. Shit, Michael Restovich looked better than Kubel and he’s a Triple-A
    hitter. And Kubel bats left, something this team does not need.

    As for the two of you and Souhan, let me stipulate that the Mauer batting second idea was to my knowledge first broached by one of my smart readers, Moroni, in the comments to our first Twins diablog. I quote: “To me the lineup should be shuffled. Mauer is the prototypical two hitter, and lacks power for the three spot. Why have one of your three worst hitters (Punto) take a top spot in the batting order and have a 30HR hitter batting 6th?” This was said on April 2 (and I immediately agreed with him and applauded
    him for his wisdom).

    The question is, how much more is Morneau worth now than he was two months ago when they were trying to land him with Mauer-like terms?
    I’ll end my round this time by agreeing with you both that Santana at
    $20-$22 million per year is a better value than Hunter at $13-$15 million a year. But can Santana be had for even that price? I’m guessing the Twins don’t sign either one, cross their fingers on Liriano, and hope that those incredible scouts keep producing the killer dope that has kept this team so likeable for the past five years.

    David Brauer

    Couple of clarifications:

    1. Brad, I wasn’t suggesting giving up on Kubel; he’s just looked like shit at the plate. Britt; I think he shows more authority when he whacks the ball than Tiffee; not disagreeing with you here, since you seems to put him between Cuddy and Tiffee. But that said, Kubel’s OPS is down from ’06, which was down from ’05. My major point is he’s not the answer this year. I still wouldn’t trade young pitching at AA or above, so I guess we go to war with the offense we have. Don’t know much about Craig Wilson, but his OPS–a quite decent .817 last year–makes him worth exploring.

    2. Arbitration. It’s true Ortiz and Silva cost $7.3 million this year, but it’s still economical, even at that price, to forestall a year of arbitration–and more importantly, free agency–for one or two players. (I agree with Brad it’s a nice problem to have.) Think of how salaries have escalated, project that cost inflation to the future, and then you realize that extra season of non-arb (instead of arb) and then arb (instead of free agency) can easily save multiple millions. There’s also the salutary effect of keeping a couple of guys in the minors to make sure the spring training lessons hold before climbing into the real foxhole.

    Britt, I was at the same Saturday game as you and Cali looked wild and
    outside; Miller was the only one that left me feeling good but it’s a small sample size.

    Mauer is a hell of a catcher, of course, and I’m not sure if catching is why he’s hurt so much. Me and my pal had a good discussion about whether a 6-5 guy would be a good third baseman. He questioned Mauer’s range–I said it’s a gun position and Mauer’s got that. It would be a shame to lose his smarts behind the plate, though Redmond deserves (but possibly cannot physically withstand) more time behind the plate, especially if we do this next year. Heinz does not appear to the answer. Is it easier to find an OPS-hitting third baseman or a sturdy replacement catcher? I kinda think the latter.

    The great risk is losing Santana AND Hunter. The Twins wouldn’t have won four of five divisions by signing a guy like Hunter to the four- or five-year deal he will command. Then again, they might’ve won the World Series (and then quickly fallen on hard times) if they had gone after a similar caliber player one of those contending seasons. But back to reality. Santana: eight years, $200 million. If he signs, he’d be as old at the end of the deal as Hunter would be if we signed him for four.

    Brad Zellar

    I agree that offense is a bigger concern than the pitching. That’s
    pretty much been the consistent thread throughout this string of
    successful seasons. The Twins were winning the Central before the
    emergence of Morneau and Cuddyer, before Luis Castillo came along, and
    before Hunter’s (apparent) late maturation as a hitter. They won with
    Jacque Jones batting leadoff, Cristian Guzman second, and Doug fucking
    Mientkiewicz hitting third.

    Granted, that was an entirely different Central Division, but even as
    currently configured this lineup looks like the 1927 Yankees in
    comparison with some of those teams. Yes, they’re tied for seventh in
    the AL in runs scored, but this is also a team that scuffled to score
    runs during its early slide. I don’t think there’s any harm in giving
    *anybody* a look, but I just wouldn’t expect guys like Encarnacion,
    Freel, or Wilson to be answers to any serious questions about the
    offense. We may be stuck with Rondell White.

    And for better or worse I also think they’re stuck with the piranhas,
    and have to hope that those guys can step it up from time to time (as
    they did on Monday against the White Sox) and take a little of the
    pressure off the middle of the order.

    You gotta figure that with the new stadium hoopla the team’s front
    office is going to take a few deep breaths and fork over the cash to
    lock up Santana and Morneau. They’ve had plenty of opportunities to
    sign Hunter to a longterm contract–will he stay or will he go has
    been a persistent theme over the last several seasons–but they
    haven’t done so, and I suppose they, like everybody else, were waiting
    for him to be a consistent run producer, and had concluded that it
    wasn’t in the cards. You know damn well he’s going to hit a rough
    patch–the guy has always been streaky–and he’s also been
    increasingly injury prone in the last couple years. If he stays
    healthy and continues to put up big numbers I’m going to wager that
    they’ll think long and hard about making a play for him, if only to
    leverage public opinion as they look ahead to the new ballpark. I’m
    still not sure that would be such a good idea, but with so few
    offensive replacement parts in their system they may feel the
    pressure.

    It’s going to be interesting to see how Mauer responds when he comes
    back. You certainly have to be concerned when such a young (and big)
    catcher misses chunks of time with leg injuries so early in his
    career. Eventually you have to figure they’ll move him from behind the
    plate, but that’ll be a decision for somewhere down the line, although
    it may come sooner than the team would like.

    Britt Robson

    Okay, prediction time. Here are my questions: Where will the Twins finish? Who is the biggest goat between now and October? The most reliable performer? And the most unlikely savior who nevertheless comes through?

    I’ll take them in reverse order. Against all odds, I say Jason Bartlett has a whale of a second half in both the field and the plate. Yes, I know he wore down last year. And yes, I know he doesn’t profile as a quality SS that way. That’s why he’s an unlikely savior. More predictably, Pat Neshek will be the new Rincon/Crain, a reliable 8th inning guy who Gardy will increasingly rely on for two innings because he can handle the work and is just that good.

    For most reliable performer, I’m going with Neshek and Cuddyer, in
    that order. Morneau will have a great season but experience a slump at a very bad time–down the stretch and/or in a series versus AL Central rivals. (There are no losers in a Morneau for Sizemore trade, but I’d still rather have the fleet, five-tool centerfielder.)
    Santana will be mostly marvelous, but a titch less reliable than the previous lights out summers.

    Goats that don’t count: Kubel and White. They’re already there, and it isn’t going to get that much better. I’m predicting the goat to be a tie between Mauer and Castillo, both for reasons of injuries, which will plague the Twins starting lineup for the rest of the season. Consequently, the Twins will be in a dogfight with the White Sox for third place behind Cleveland and Detroit, respectively. The Tribe’s bullpen is fine, folks, with Betancourt reliable, Mastny gaining experience and Borowski better than his numbers indicate (two horrible outings account for that high ERA. Check out his save percentage–I think he’s 17 for 19 or something like that–for his true performance value) and the rotation bolstered enough by Westbrook’s return to keep the pen from burning out.

    As always, thanks for your time and wisdom. Let’s do it again on the 4th of July.

    David Brauer

    At this point, I like the Twins third. I stick with Detroit as the division winner.

    Biggest goat: Ford. Not a vital cog, but this is the place I have to stick my “Why is Lew Ford even in the majors anymore?” gripe. No upside, everything else is slipping (OPS under .600 last year, under .500 this year, mediocre at best outfielder). Among the regulars, I’ll take a flier on Nathan. More hits than innings pitched and several other troubling trends. Not a sure thing but a good longshot.

    Most reliable: I’d love to pick Castillo; you get exactly the same good thing every time–uncanny for a position player. But health is an issue. I’ll take Redmond.

    Unlikely savior: Kubel, if he does a Cuddy on us second half.

    Brad Zellar

    Neshek already *is* the new Crain/Rincon. And he already has more
    intensity and pitching intelligence than either of them. I worry a
    little bit about him wearing down, but I love his zeal and attention
    to detail, and he really is a first-rate character and a great story.

    And I agree with Britt about Bartlett. I think they guy is just
    getting healthy, and he seems to be regaining some of his swagger. At
    the very least I don’t think he’s anybody the Twins need to worry
    about. I also like Bonser’s chances to surprise. He’s a battler, and
    clearly has a pretty fierce desire to get better, so it wouldn’t stun
    me much if his learning curve isn’t as steep as, say, Baker’s.

    I’ll also go with Cuddyer as the most reliable performer. He’s still
    not drawing a ton of walks, but his pitch selection, ability to work
    the count, and plate coverage just gets better and better (did you see
    the Contreras pitch he looped for an rbi single on Monday? Great at
    bat). And Morneau, I believe, is going to have a monster year. I expect he’ll only get better with Mauer back in the lineup.

    If the season runs aground in the second half I expect it’s going to
    be due to the collective collapse of the piranhas, and is going to
    make that whole marketing gambit look foolish. I also think teams are
    eventually going to learn to pitch around Hunter, or at least to pitch
    him more carefully. I continue to be astonished by how many hittable
    pitches he’s seeing, and can’t understand *why*.

    I’m a little bit reluctant to make any predictions at this point;
    that’s a cop-out, I know, but I’d like to see how the Twins respond
    after Mauer comes back, and as the bullpen sorts itself out over the
    next couple weeks. And I’m eager to have a look at Slowey. I’m still
    going to cling to my belief (an annual delusion, actually) that this
    team can hold its own the rest of the way. And I still believe that
    both Detroit and Cleveland are going to fall off and let the Twins
    back into the race. I’m guessing the wild card is going to again come
    out of the Central, and I like the Twins’ chances.

  • Nice. Nice. Very Nice.

    Wasn’t that swell?

    Isn’t it always a fine thing to see the local nine kick the living snot out of those shitheels from Chicago?

    And wasn’t it comforting to see Ramon Ortiz get his feet wet coming out of the bullpen, in a situation where there was absolutely no pressure? He did a nice job, too: three outs on seven pitches.

    Sixteen hits and seven walks: Swell. Ten hits from the top four guys in the batting order, and six hits from the bottom three. That was also swell.

    We’ve seen all manner of swellness over the last several games, and for perhaps the first sustained stretch all year the Twins have looked every bit like the team we all hoped they’d be coming out of spring training.

    Meanwhile, Britt Robson, David Brauer, and I kick around some thoughts on the first couple months of the season over at Britt’s blog, On the Ball. Go over there now and chime in on the conversation.

    We spent a fair amount of time talking about how difficult it’s going to be for the Twins to find the money to sign Hunter, Santana, and Morneau (the consensus being that Hunter is rapidly pricing himself out of Minnesota’s budget), but none of us mentioned Michael Cuddyer. This is a guy who’s also going to end up costing the Twins a shitload of money.

  • Even With Maximum Buy-Outs, Strib Plans Lay-Offs

    (SEE IMPORTANT UPDATE BELOW)>

    Is this bait and switch?

    Star Tribune Guild officer Chris Serres notifying his colleagues this morning …

    >>> Christopher Serres 5/29/2007 9:44 AM >>>

    Dear Guild friends and colleagues,

    The buyout package agreed to by the Guild was intended to reduce the need for involuntary layoffs. However, there is still a possibility that layoffs will occur, even if the company meets its targeted goal of 50 job reductions in the newsroom and editorial departments.

    In a meeting with management on May 18, Guild members of the Star Tribune support staff were told that the company intended to eliminate 10 of their positions, including six news assistants. If that goal was not reached, layoffs might occur, Guild members were told.

    It is the first indication that cuts to the newsroom could exceed the 50 originally sought by the company when it unveiled its cost-cutting plan earlier this month.

    Guesstimates in recent days had at least 50 Stribbers accepting the paper’s buy-out plan. (Deadline to notify the paper is 5 p.m. June 1, this Friday.) Previously it had been assumed that 50 newsroom cuts (not all necessarily reporters) would satisfy new owners, Avista Capital Partners, at least for the time being. This latest news suggests otherwise.

    Since a lay-off under current rules would garner less medical coverage than is being offered under the buy-out, this “news” could inspire even more to take the money and run.

    UPDATE: Later Tuesday Strib Guild members received the following correction …

    Dear Guild members,

    In a note sent earlier today about possible layoffs, the following sentence was not accurate: “It is the first indication that cuts to the newsroom could exceed the 50 originally sought by the company when it unveiled its cost-cutting plan earlier this month.”

    In fact, the company has assured us that it does not intend job cuts to exceed 50 positions. However, targeted layoffs may occur in job classifications in which there are too many people for the positions available.

    But the total jobs cut, either through layoffs or buyouts, likely will not exceed 50.

    Apologies for the error.

    Your unit officers

  • Hot Damn! Prince's In-Store Performance at Macy's

    According to the press release I just received from Macy’s:

    Macy’s North and Revelations Perfume and Cosmetics, marketers of Prince’s upcoming fragrance 3121, today announced an exclusive opportunity for 1,400 fans to see Prince perform in his hometown of Minneapolis at Macy’s downtown flagship store on 07/07/07. Fans will receive a once-in-a-lifetime xclusive [sic] 3121 party with an unprecedented “Ultimate Prince Xperience.”

    The “Ultimate Prince Xperience” package is a comprehensive assortment of all things Purple and will go on sale in-store only on 06/01/07 at Macy’s Minneapolis at 10am in the cosmetics department on the first floor. The sale will continue at Macy’s at the Guest Service Center on the 5th floor on 06/02/07 if tickets remain. Total price $250 plus service fees and tax.

  • Music in Many Amalgamations

    MUSIC, POETRY, AND PROSE
    Spiked Coffee

    After a nice, long weekend of commemorating war veterans, you should really think about starting off the week by exploring you bohemian side. Join Spiked Coffee at the 331 Club for an evening of readings and music. Have a short piece you’d like to share? Sign up for the writer’s open mic. Otherwise, just sit back and enjoy the show. The evening begins with live music by Ron Hall, Sam Keenan, and Amy Ault, followed by the open mic with writers from Hamline, the U of M, Coffee House Press, and Lit 6. Then stick around and mingle to the music of Danny Sigelman. Plus, enjoy $2.50 margaritas all night and half-price bottles of wine until 9 p.m.

    7 p.m. (open mic sign-up at 9 p.m., open mic at 10:15 p.m.) 331 Club, 331 NE 13th Ave., Minneapolis; 612-331-1746.

    MUSIC AND VIDEO
    The Basement Tapes

    babes_in_toyland.jpgMaybe it’s just because I was so entrenched in it then, but I always think of the 80s as the heyday of the Minneapolis music scene. Husker Du, Morris Day & The Time, The Replacements, The Jayhawks, Soul Asylum, Babes in Toyland, Run Westy Run, The Cows — these bands were at the forefront, breaking out beyond the local scene to a national scale. But let’s face it, the 80s wasn’t just about the music, it was all about MTV. The 80s aesthetic isn’t complete without taking a look at music videos from this period. And in this heyday of Minneapolis music, our local bands were busy making music videos of their own. Revisit the 80s and 90s with a limited run, weekly series of nostalgic videos from the First Avenue video archives. The Basement Tapes series includes brief live performances by DEMO bands of the present, videos of the past, and Q & A sessions with some of the featured artists.

    8 p.m., Bryant Lake Bowl, 810 West Lake St., Minneapolis; 612-825-8949; $8-10 (pay what you can).

    MUSIC
    The Gyuto Tibetan Tantric Choir

    gyuto_monks.jpgFleeing Chinese repression in their homeland, close to 2,000 Tibetans made Minnesota their home in the early 90s, making this the second largest Tibetan community in the country. Around this same time, musicians like Phillip Glass and Grateful Dead percussionist Mickey Hart were undertaking a mission to expose the world to the unearthly multiphonic chanting of the Gyuto Monks. Years later, the Tibetan Tantric Choir tours the world to sold-out shows, with soundtracks to films such as Kundun and Seven Years in Tibet under their belt. The Gyuto Tibetan Tantric Choir, among the the world’s foremost performers of sacred Buddhist chant, have perfected a special type of chant in which each monk sings not a single note but an entire chord, generating a sound of ethereal beauty that shakes listeners to their very core. Hear them for yourself tonight, along with a film about the life and work of Jetsun Pema, sister of the Dalai Lama and an advocate for refugee children. Pema was scheduled to appear in person, but had to cancel due to a family emergency.

    7 p.m., Children’s Theatre Company, 2400 3rd Ave S., Minneapolis; 612-874-0400; $22-$28 ($15 children, seniors, and students).

    SPORTS
    Minnesota Twins vs. Chicago White Sox

    2786551441.jpegIt’s when the Twins are up against strong batting teams that we finally get to see Santana pitch. And I thought maybe tonight would be such an opportunity, but yesterday got in the way. After a 10-4 victory over the Chicago White Sox yesterday, with Santana pitching, todays game promises to be an interesting one nonetheless. It looks like Bonser will most likely be pitching. And hey, Mauer might be back during this game or the next. If that isn’t enough to entice you, then how about a Guthrie-quality performance? Cast members from the Guthrie’s patriotic summer musical 1776 will take a break from rehearsal to cheer on the Twins tonight with their rendition of “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” during the 7th inning stretch. Go, Twins! We won the first game against the Sox earlier this month, only to lose the next two. Will we let that happen again? I hope not.

    7:10 p.m., Metrodome, 34 Kirby Puckett Pl., Minneapolis; 612-375-1366; $7-105.

    ON THE NET
    Minnesota Horror

    La Maldicion del Vampiro Aztec
    Poison to You, Medicine to Me
    Finger Food
    Shop Chop Amateur Horror Video
    Rabidness – The Curse of the Catman
    Tales of the Dead trailor
    Dawning 2006 – trailor
    Doomed to Consumer trailor

  • Croatia

    My friend Thomas and I were in Dubrovnik, Croatia, for two-weeks this past December. The town was getting ready for St. Nicholas Day–when the children receive chocolate in their stockings–and part of the celebration is a parade of the Dubrovnik Region Old-Timers Car Club. Well, it was quite a surprise for us as we sat sipping mocciatos at a cafe on Stradun, the pedestrian-only main street of Dubrovnik.

    Lynette Nyman

  • Texas

    Hello – I have always enjoyed the red-handed pictures and blurb. We took two pictures and couldn’t decide which one you would like better: the classic Alamo or the Air Force Reserve Jet Car which goes 400 mph and runs on biodiesel.

    While the rest of us toiled away in below zero temps in early February, Kelly Marczak and Lisa Thurstin of the American Lung Association were enjoying 70 degrees at the Alamo and basking in the warmth of the National Biodiesel Conference in San Antonio, TX. Conference attendance was 3,500 with representatives from the U.S. and 15 countries. Celebrity biodiesel-supporters spotted at the meeting included Larry Hagman of Dallas and I Dream of Jeannie fame; country icon Merle Haggard; actress Daryl Hannah and political-hybrid/husband-wife team, Mary Matalin & James Carville. Our region is looked to as the national leader in production and use of biodiesel — all Minnesota diesel fuel sold at retail contains 2% biodiesel. The American Lung Association works to educate consumers, truckers and service station owners about the benefits of biodiesel as a “Clean Air Choice.” Learn more at: www.CleanAirChoice.org .

    Kelly Marczak and Lisa Thurstin

  • Murder, Up Close

    I pick up your magazine every month. The March cover [“Murder by Numbers”] seemed too much for me to bear. But then a friend told me there was an accounting of every murder that took place in Minneapolis last year. I went directly to victim number thirty-six, my son. His name was Pestelence V.D. El-Shabazz, aka Valentine Alexander Durray Riley. We all know—including the homicide detectives working on this case—that he had a criminal record. But despite being incarcerated, he was a very good son to his mother. He was always concerned about me, always called me on the phone, always encouraged me about my goals in life, and loved and respected me. These qualities should be reason enough to solve his and these other unsolved murder cases. I love and miss my child, my son, my friend. He wrote me a rap symphony called “My Mama.” He was very intelligent and full of good advice. He had the most handsome smile. He is surely missed by all who knew him.

    It would be nice if your March issue could be circulated all over the North Side of Minneapolis. I have always been concerned about my community. I hope that the next elected officials will care about it, too, and that the people who live there will care even more. Form more block clubs, watch out for your neighbors, call the police more often, and report the drug and gun dealers. I always did. There has to be a change. We have to do a better job of taking care of each other.

    Angela Cardelia Riley, Hopkins