I would like to tell you that my daughter and I spend quality time together watching the Masterpiece series of Jane Austen stories: pretty, bonneted heroines practicing archery and dropping calling cards and plotting to win the hearts of handsome young men. I would like to tell you that. But it’s just not true.
A few nights ago, in the interest of bonding, I sat down with her to watch (and I shudder, literally, as I type this) The Moment of Truth.
It’s a game show. . . .sort of. Also a reality program, I suppose, in the sense that humiliating people seems to be the staple of these shows. It involves a "contestant" who agrees to answer something like 50 questions — personal questions — while hooked up to a lie detector. Then he or she goes on FOX-TV (which I’m embarrassed to say, I was not aware prior to this was one of the 8 channels we receive) and must answer an assortment of the same questions in front of three people: a spouse or partner, parents, friends, in some cases a boss.
"You won’t believe it, Mom," my daughter said and invited me to sit next to her. (Do you know how rare this is??) So I did. And I didn’t. . . .believe it, that is.
The questions start off easy: Do you belong to the Hair Club for Men? Have you ever gone through a co-worker’s personal things? And by answering these "correctly" — meaning truthfully — the person in the chair wins something nominal, like ten grand.
Then they get weird, sick, and invasive. Also strangely banal. Have you ever had a sexual fantasy while in church? Have you ever touched a client more than was necessary? Have you put off having children because you’re worried that your marriage won’t last?
Now first of all, I’ve heard that men have something like 12-25 sexual fantasies a day. So how in the world could any guy be expected to make it through an entire hour-long church service without? Second, you need to define the word "necessary" before it’s possible to determine what touch is or isn’t. And finally, when on the brink of becoming a parent, isn’t it normal — healthy, even — to question whether or not your marriage will last. . . .especially if you’re the sort of person who will go on national television to talk about intensely personal things.
These questions strike me as tedious and rhetorical. I mean, do you walk up to strangers on the street and ask them if they masturbate? Or if they pick their nose while driving. No (I hope). You simply assume that they do. But it is not in your nature — certainly it is not in mine — to solicit the details.
And what have we come to if this is considered entertainment?
I’ll tell you what I came to: I came to the point where I needed to cleanse. Say you spent an evening eating cotton candy and drinking root beer (again, I shudder); you’d need to spend the next day ingesting nothing but raw carrots and hot tea in order to undo the damage you’d done.
The same goes when the damage is psychic. Watching Moment of Truth was so sullying, in fact, that I needed to spend the rest of the evening talking seriously to my daughter about dignity (she was thrilled); listening to Mozart; and drinking a $70 Burgundy.
The Givry 1er Cru 2005 is made by Domaine Joblot. It has 13% alcohol and is a deceptive wine: so smooth at first it seems simple, like a single, ripe, ruby fruit. But if you pay attention, you’ll find hints of lavender, rose, and nutmeg within the soft cherry base. As you drink and the wine breathes, it seems almost to wink: elements of orange zest, allspice, and just a breath of musk come zinging through. This is a vintage that was made for age: experts say the Givry 1er Cru may be cellared — and will continue to improve — for up to 15 years.
Still, I’m not sorry I drank it all, rather than waiting for 2023. I needed it as an antidote to the sleazy stream of "truths" I heard the other night. I’m hoping in 15 years the reality TV craze will have died down, and that when my daughter and I sit down together — she at 28 and I at 56 — it will be over a bottle of something equally as nice.
Leave a Reply Cancel reply