How sad and impoverished must life be for the anosmiacs among us, those poor wretches who have lost the ability to smell?
C’est tragique! as Marcel Proust might say, who also said, “When nothing else remains from the past, friends and things long gone, the odors from their living remain as tiny drops of their essence for you to remember.”
The olfactory epithelium is a tiny piece of real estate in the nasal cavity, crowded with millions of neurons, every one of which is equipped with a sort of odorant antennae that recognizes tens of thousands of distinct smells and passes them along to the brain’s olfactory cortex, where studies have long shown that even subtle odors have the power to release emotions and memories that have been stashed away in the most distant reaches of the subconscious.
Wouldn’t it be lovely, we’ve often thought, to have access to a bottled fragrance that could recall to us cherished people and places from our past? Prince, for instance, or Sarah Jessica Parker, or…Roseville?
Celebrity scents, of course, are all the rage these days. And now a Manhattan parfumier is introducing a line of themed perfumes targeted at New York’s neighborhoods and boroughs. Its most recent addition, Coney Island (which costs $178 for 3.4 ounces and incorporates nearly 200 ingredients, including melon, guava, and caramel), opened the door to a dizzying range of local possibilities. While the Rake’s line of TC Scent™ colognes and perfumes is still in the laboratory stages, we thought we’d give you a sneak peek at some of the projects taking shape on our conference room table and driving us into fits of desire, restlessness, and nostalgic reverie.
Blaine!
Suburban androgyny in a bottle, Blaine! is the ultimate in his-and-her scents, a sort of throwback perlogne that incorporates hard and soft, sweet and sour, practicality and romance, in one irresistible concoction that carries subtle hints of Love’s Baby Soft, charcoal briquettes, Captain Morgan, OFF!, Hai Karate, lilacs, and WD-40. Won’t wash off in the hot tub and virtually guaranteed to trigger pheromone frenzies that’ll have the whole neighborhood buzzing. Happy hour at T.G.I. Fridays will never be the same.
Pig’s Eye Potion
Money has a smell and that smell is Pig’s Eye Potion, the ultimate status scent. Combining the essence of fine old mahogany with sparks of cumin and cilantro, Pig’s Eye evokes the stately elegance of Summit Avenue, but with a playful undercurrent of Selby and Western.
Mound for Men
Mound is potent yet understated, with hints of stonewashed denim, pine, and an indescribable zest reminiscent of Heinz 57. A scent for strong and stoic types, Mound does all the talking, and what it says (and says loudly) is, “I’m a man and damn proud of it. Screw you Minnetonka.”
Utterly Uptown
Inspired by the piquant paste of dissolving deodorant, chlorine, baked concrete, the spices of Thailand and India, and the distinct smell produced by the combination of synthetic footwear and ankle perspiration, this fragrance marries notes of Nag Champa and faux suede with the spilt 3M chemicals of Lake Calhoun for a sensory experience that literally melts (into) the skin.
Eden Prairie for Women
The closest to God a woman can get without being dead, this fragrance combines the innocence of daisies with hints of fresh linen and that timelessly captivating “new car” smell. Eden Prairie is not for harlots, but rather for the chaste woman. A heavenly complement to sensible shoes and support panel pantyhose, it’s the scent that states firmly, “I’m married, thank you very much.”
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