The Best Case Scenario Handbook, by John Tierney

Since the odds of you being attacked by a shark are about the same as being marooned on a desert island with Jennifer Lopez or Russell Crowe, New York Times writer John Tierney has written The Best Case Scenario Handbook, a parody of those successful worst-case handbooks. If you are going to learn how to survive an elevator free-fall, why not also learn how to act when Santa Claus actually shows up (“Santa knows the difference between ‘good’ scotch and ‘bad’ scotch”)? Or how to receive a divine visitation (“Be accommodating, but not slavish”)? Or how to respond when an ATM just keeps on spitting money at you? (Duh.) Tierney, who co-wrote the self-help spoof God Is My Broker: A Monk-Tycoon Reveals the 7 1/2 Laws of Spiritual and Financial Growth , has crafted a witty, often hilarious book that lives up to the expectations laid out in Christopher Buckley’s laughing and touching introduction. (To wit: the conceit is funny, sure. But it wouldn’t stay funny for 125 pages if Tierney couldn’t keep the laughs coming.) By the way, step number three for surviving on a desert island with Jennifer Lopez? Discreetly avoid rescue.