Topless. Chicks. With Sticks.

Like summer is upon us and will be gone faster than Flo Rida will be hot. With this in mind, I have to make a confession. I love women in convertibles (primarily) who shift their own cars. I want the summer streets filled with them. So. Here are my top three picks for the best […]

and then I left

when you reach somewhere that is nowhere and you talk with sadness to someone younger, beautiful, longing with peace in her eyes you feel calm and your worries vanish like water through the fingers  of a fist gripping fear     

Don't Mess With The Lohan. (As If.)

I am sitting here late in the evening babysitting. Perhaps it is because I feel so esconced here in a secure state of suburban responsibility that I can safely venture into a topic I should know little about. Then, of course, it could be because I work with a lot of "young" people.  By "young" […]

Perverts Park Here

What’s in a word? More specifically what word makes a post zoom up the popular pole faster than others? Of course, there are the easy words like "porn" and "sex." Then there are the more inventive words (for professional writers) and happy accidents (for plebians like me). I have come across one recently. I won’t […]

Rum, Sodomy, & No Cash

(This the car from its most umistakable angle. It looks even more like a nameless Japanese car from the rear and side.) The Pax Britannica that led to a relatively peaceful 1800s (unless you were Irish) was imposed primarily by the glorious Royal Navy. While it is politic to assert this prestige came from good […]

Topless Nymph. Not For You.

With all the focus on small footprint cars these days, you’d think smart brands like Nissan would send us all their candy. The "us" I am referring to would be, of course, the middle-aged lotharios that long for their youth. And few cars say "younger than you should be" than the Nissan Micra—arguably the cutest […]

Chicks Live on Farms

It occured to me this morning that I must update my post "Bimbos, Himbos and Harleys" with new content and here is why: While it is true that the DelSol, the VW rabbit convertible and the Corvette are charter members of the Bimbo & Himbo Hall of Fame, not many of you drive these things. […]

Kevin Spacey. Naked.

I usually take my coffee black. I prefer the same color in comedies, and particularly in that rare dark comedy that can be called a film.   As you raid your video store or netflix account this weekend, finding a good dark film can be difficult–particularly when they are packaged as standard-blend comedies of the […]

Legal Lolitas

I have always wondered why certain cars remain off limits to men of a particular age. What makes a Red Corvette more age-appropriate than a Mini Cooper? (Forgetting the conventional wisdom that posits the Corvette as "gold chain"—a sentiment unmasked as a simple prejudice with the Z06, a true American Beauty in red.) Or, for […]


(pictured: the AMG R-class Mercedes. 502HP, 0-60, 4.7 seconds. Meet the Mom who owns one–lives in Excelsior.) Mother’s Day manipulative? Not for Road Rakes. I have always found, for example, that Mimosas pair nicely with a late model Mercedes and/or Maserati. For this reason, you ought consider taking your mom car shopping. Women buy more […]