War Dance

Now that it’s actually warming up a bit, try to get outside this weekend, even if it’s just for a short walk. It’s about time we start easing our way out of hibernation and stripping off a layer or two. We certainly need it. Fortunately, Saturday is a big day for outdoor activities — both serious and festive — so we can avail ourselves of the excuse and motivation to leave the nest.

PROTEST
Five Years Too Long

Tired of the war in Iraq? Sick of needless deaths, worry, and fear? Join other like-minded people this weekend to demand an end to the war and the return of our troops.

Saturday at 1 p.m., corner of Hennepin Ave. & Lagoon Ave., Uptown Minneapolis.

HOLIDAY PARADE
Saint Patrick’s Day Parade

Of course, if you’re looking for a "lighter" (less noble) cause, you can join the Saint Patrick’s Day debauchery in St. Paul. Ok. True. Saint Patrick’s Day isn’t until Monday, and it’s not really about debauchery (no, really, it isn’t), but this year’s Saint Patrick’s Parade is being held two days early in order to "avoid conflicting with Holy Week." Conflicting with Holy Week? Why would a saint’s day celebration conflict with Holy Week? Could it be the green beer? Could it be the booze? I’m guessing it has little to do with little green men and four-leaf clovers.

Saturday at Noon, 4th Street, from Sibley to Broadway, St. Paul.

THEATER & PERFORMANCE
Nine Parts of Desire

I’m not usually a big fan of one-woman shows. Granted, there’s often a good deal of talent involved. I just have a hard time digesting the cookie-cutter feminist rhetoric that seldom fails to emerge: one woman traversing generations and circumstances to reach a common experience that somehow results, revolves, and depends upon her politicized body. Oy! And yet… and yet… somehow… 9 Parts of Desire pulls it off splendidly. For starters, Kate Eiphrig is spectacular. With little more than a sheet as a prop, Kate manages to portray nine different women — each in such a unique way that even when she brings all their voices together, toward the end of the performance, you know exactly who is doing the talking. With war all around them — or threatening their families — these nine characters bring to life the experiences of Iraqi women both in Iraq and in America. But what we see isn’t the usual pretty package, with a bow on top. Perhaps this is why it works: it addresses the subleties and nuances without trying to hit the audience over the head with answers and explanations. There are no answers in a world wracked by war and oppression. No one person is so astute as to escape effect and internalization. And a character’s truth is as much the truth as our own — it’s amazing how well we can lie to ourselves in times of dire need. Well, lie to yourself all you want, but don’t miss this show. It’s the best show I’ve seen yet in the Dowling Theater.

Friday at 7:30 p.m., Saturday at 1 and 7:30 p.m., and Sunday at 7 p.m., Guthrie, Dowling Studio, 818 South 2nd St., Minneapolis; 612-377-2224; $22-$30.

MUSIC
Jonathan Richman and Vic Chesnutt

This odd but spectacular double-header pairs two veteran
singer/songwriters from opposite sides of the emotional spectrum. At
one end is the naively optimistic Jonathan Richman,
known for his playful and charmingly inane simplicity. Even if he
doesn’t dive into his classic songbook from his days with the Modern
Lovers, he can draw upon nearly thirty years of consistently wonderful
solo albums. At the other pole is the noted cynic Vic Chesnutt.
His albums are significantly darker and deeper, traits stemming at
least in part from his perspective as a paraplegic. This date will be
an intimate solo appearance, without the members of Godspeed You! Black
Emperor and Fugazi, who helped transform Chesnutt’s latest record into
a moving and chaotic masterpiece. —Christopher Hontos

Friday at 8 p.m., Cedar Cultural Center, 416 Cedar Ave. S., Minneapolis; 612-338-2674; $16.

Boyd Conducts Schumann

The Saint Paul Chamber Orchestra promises a spectacular series of shows this weekend with artistic partner Douglas Boyd at the helm. Boyd will conduct a program of Schumann (Symphony No. 4 in D Minor) and Weill (Concerto for Violin and Wind Instruments) — with concertmaster Steven Copes on the latter. “It’s the same sound world as the young Hindemith," says Copes of the Weill piece, "wild, obsessive rhythms and lush, strange but beautiful harmonies everywhere.” While Friday night’s Jazzed-Up programming includes Ravel’s Trio in A Minor for Piano, Violin and Cello and vocalist Christine Rosholt, the other two performances include Debussy’s Prelude to the Afternoon of a Faun.

Friday at 10:30 a.m. and Saturday ay 8 p.m., Ordway Center for the Performing Arts, 345 Washington Street, Saint Paul; 651-291-1144. Sunday at 2 p.m., Ted Mann Concert Hall, University of Minnesota, 2106 S 4th St., Minneapolis, 612-626-1892; $11-$59.

And, of course, Bruce Sprinsteen is playing at the Xcel on Sunday.

ART
The River to Infinity Tapers Off

In River to Infinity-The Vanishing Points, Andrea Stanislav
comments on Manifest Destiny, among other topics, via video images of
mirrored obelisks in Utah’s Great Salt Flats. This is the exhibit’s
last weekend, so don’t miss out.

Friday and Saturday from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Sunday from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., MAEP Galleries, Minneapolis Institue of Arts, 2400 Third Ave. S., Minneapolis; 612-870-6323.

FILM
Funny Games

Word has it that controversial director Michael Haneke (The Piano Teacher, Caché) simply remade his original 1997 shockfest shot by shot. But who cares? The original Funny Games
is hands-down one of the most disturbing films ever made; and if this
one has Naomi Watts in the lead we’re, well, game. With the story of a
bourgeois family who, while vacationing at their lake home, are
attacked by a pair of young men clad in what appear to be Wimbledon
tennis outfits, Haneke managed not only to raise the tension, ever so
slowly, to unbearable levels; he also made us, the audience, feel
culpable. The ’97 version is a masterpiece and possibly the worst date
movie ever. The remake promises to be equally unsettling. —Peter Schilling

Opens Friday at Lagoon Cinema, 612-825-6006.

Fly Me To The Moon: Animation for All Ages

Once again, the library’s very own cinema sprites, Deb Girdwood and
Isabelle Harder, bring your lucky kids some of the finest animation in
the world—and we’re not talking Saturday-morning corporate fare,
either. Drag the offspring to the library for such inspired lunacy as
“Petalocity,” a story of “a little girl who goes to extremes of bravery
in order to keep her potted plant safe.” These shorts could very well
rouse your children to write, draw, sing, and maybe even embark on
their own heroic endeavors. And that’s far better than further
inflaming their desire for Happy Meals, no? Part of the Childish Films
series, this show will be introduced by local animator Ben Bury. —Peter Schilling

Saturday at 10:30 a.m., Central Minneapolis Library, 300 Nicollet Mall; 612-630-6000.

DINNER, A MOVIE, & MORE
Milonga Night

It’s a form of music. It’s a dance. It’s a tango party. It’s Milonga night — with dinner and a movie. Live it up tonight in true Argentinean style. Begin the evening with a wine tasting of Alfredo Roca Pinot Noir Mendoza, from Salud America Wines. Then settle in for a three-course Agentinean dinner from Restaurant Alma as you watch Herencia, an Argentinean film about an unlikely friendship between an
ornery 60-year-old woman who owns a restaurant and a 24-year-old German
man looking for a girlfriend. Dinner includes a mixed green salad, a plato de asado with various grilled cuts of beef served alongside chorizo and empanadas, and a fabulous flan for dessert. Once the belly is full and the mind is at peace, treat the body and soul to a special Tango performance by El Toro Tango, followed by an all-out Milonga-style dance party. During the music, live statues dressed as gods and goddesses of love from Vox Medusa will fill the balcony of the Suburban World, while break dancers and fire dancers entertain the crowd.

Saturday at 6 p.m., Dinner and Film at 7 p.m., Tango show at 9 p.m., and party at 9:30 p.m.; Suburban World Theatre, 3022 Hennepin Ave., Minneapolis; 952-451-1400; $39 plus tax and gratuity (without wine, $34), party only $10, VIP $125.