Category: Article

  • Visiting Hours

    A flash of orange prison scrubs, followed by a web of tight, elegant braids, were all that was visible of Lamilem Badasa as she sat down for a video-conference interview. The camera angles were off, and she’s only five feet tall, so just the top of her head appeared on screen.

    On the other side of the cameras, visitors to the Ramsey County Jail sat elbow to elbow at cubicles, straining to hear the voices of family members through the phone receivers. Digital clocks mounted on the Plexiglas-encased video monitors counted down the last five minutes of each twenty-minute visit. Everyone had to shout to be heard. The cacophony of voices bore the stress of a dozen fresh arrests.

    Badasa, who came to Minneapolis from Ethiopia in 2003, has been in jail since January 26, 2006, though she’s never been charged with a crime. Instead, Kristin Olmanson, a federal immigration judge in Bloomington, denied her political-asylum claim, and so U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE, formerly known as the INS) took her into custody. Now, even as she receives therapy and medication from the Center for Victims of Torture and free legal representation from Minnesota Advocates for Human Rights, ICE is moving forward with her “removal”—that is, her deportation to Ethiopia.

    Badasa joined dozens of other immigrants at the Ramsey County Jail. According to Sheriff Bill Fletcher, on a typical day his 494-bed facility houses some sixty detainees facing deportation to countries as diverse as Mexico, Guatemala, Ecuador, China, Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam, Somalia, Liberia, Sierra Leone, and Bosnia. The jail contracts bed space out to ICE at a rate of eighty dollars per prisoner per day, garnering the county $1.9 million last year. Immigrant detainees are held on average for about a hundred days, but as Badasa’s case demonstrates, stays can drag on for far longer. Her total time is now fifteen months and counting.

    County jails, however, aren’t designed for long-term stays. Most have no recreational programming, no religious services, and no access to the outdoors. Menus rely heavily on the hotdog-and-baloney family. Badasa, who eats no pork, has lost fifteen pounds. She hasn’t seen the sun in more than a year; for exercise, she runs up and down the stairs in her cellblock. A devout Christian, she rises at 5:00 a.m. to read her Amharic-language Bible before beginning work as the jail’s “swamper,” serving meals to other inmates, sweeping, and cleaning bathrooms. Far from complaining, Badasa is grateful for the job. She said it helps stave off anxiety and depression during her interminable wait.

    As she recounted it, Badasa’s journey to Minnesota began in 1998, when her father was called to fight in the Ethiopian-Eritrean war but didn’t want to go. He was arrested and never came home. Badasa, who was twenty-one at the time, went to look for him at the jail of the provincial city where they lived. Later, soldiers came to look for her at her home. They beat her mother and arrested Badasa. She was in jail for a week. After her release, the local military chief required her to check in at the jail each week.

    There were places in Badasa’s story where she could not find the words to go on—this was one. But her political-asylum claim states that she was repeatedly sexually abused, both during her stay in jail and after, for two years. She eventually fled to Addis Ababa, where she lived in hiding for another two years. In 2003, she heard that she was in danger of being arrested again. With the help of a smuggler she fled again, first to Italy, and then, on a false Italian passport, to Minneapolis, where she had one tenuous contact, a woman from her hometown.

    Badasa’s case is pending before the National Board of Immigration Appeals, and if it fails there, her lawyer will appeal to the Eighth Circuit Court. It will be months, perhaps another year before she hears anything. The debilitating effects of indefinite detention are well documented. Speaking over the phone, Badasa put it this way: “When you’re pregnant you know it will be nine months. Here I know nothing. I don’t even know tomorrow.”

    Badasa said she’s had no contact with her mother or siblings since she left Ethiopia. Even a letter, she believes, could put them in danger. As she said this, waves of distress mounted on her forehead. She began to cry. The five-minute-warning clock ticked down to a minute twenty-five. She was still crying when the video monitor went dead.

    The dead screen seems to hit all the visitors the same way: a moment of shock, a glance around the room, perhaps looking for someplace to register a complaint. But the rules are strict. Even for those saying goodbye to a family member before she is deported, twenty minutes of cold screen time is all they get. Up at the front desk, the sheriff admonishes everyone to sign out before leaving.

  • Putting My Ethics on Hold

    We’ve all done things we’re ashamed of—line dancing, acting innocent after unleashing something silent but deadly, heresy. If by chance you just thought to yourself, “Not me!” Well, the heck with you. Tell you what. Save yourself some time and page through to another article, because I think you’re lying.

    Twenty years ago, I had a job saying suggestive things over the phone. I’d like to say that I only did it once, and that it was just that one time for the money … but I was good at it. I was so wicked good at it that I worked for two different syndicates simultaneously. I was a telemarketer. I sold quickie carpet cleaning in the afternoons, and a disreputable knockoff of Happenings Books in the evenings.

    I started out innocent enough. I was seventeen, inexperienced, tired of waitressing, and I didn’t have the hair for retail. I saw a listing in the want ads: “Work in a rock ’n’ roll atmosphere.” Air-conditioned office. Base pay $6.50 an hour, with generous commissions. It was July and I was living in a fourth-floor-walk-up-one-bedroom microwave oven. It was the air conditioning that sold me.

    Refrigerate hell all you want; it still stinks of sulfur. The new boss gave me a script, a stack of contacts, and a phone, and showed me the rack where I could hang my ethics. They didn’t order me to lie exactly, but unless you were pretty limber with the truth you wouldn’t ring the sales bell on the wall beside the manager’s desk very often. Ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thy integrity. And if it tolled three times before noon you’d get free pizza for lunch.

    I couldn’t go back to my old grease-pit restaurant job. I had left, pompously boasting to my manager that I was leaving to work in an office. I had to keep the phone-bank gig for at least a couple of months, by which time the jerk would be fired. (Restaurant managers I worked for never lasted longer than a trial magazine subscription.) So, for the time being, my rent (and pride) depended on convincing shut-ins that they should invest in half-priced oil-change coupons.

    Rationalization kicked in right away. People have to get their carpets cleaned, right? They may as well hire us—even if our rent-a-drunk servicemen were really off-season carnies. That’s not the way I pitched it, though. I did voice profiling. If I heard an age tremor in your voice, I filibustered about the eighteen kinds of sick that come from dust mites. Grandmas respond well to scare tactics. “Do you ever babysit your grandkids? Do they play on the floor?”

    If I heard the voice of a tired man, my voice would turn warm and liquid. Once that lock de-icer went to work, I’d shove the key right in and twist it. Because you know, if you’re a weary, hardworking man, “you sure do have things you’d rather do on Saturday than suck crud out of your carpets.”

    The evening gig’s “rock ’n’ roll atmosphere” was a portable radio set to KQ and a twenty-eight-year-old boss with a mullet and sport-coat sleeves jacked up to his forearms. The coupon-book tycoon’s office “adornment” looked like she was right out of a ZZ Top video. She wore tight miniskirts and heels, sucked on lollipops and used crayons to fill in supermarket coloring books. She could manage all this while cradling the phone to her ear and talking to friends for the entire shift.

    But she did less harm than I did. She was innocuous. I hustled strangers, sticking on them like a burr, hyping mom-and-pop businesses in neighborhoods I knew nothing about. I told the callers about great deals right in their own backyards, available to them only if they bought this thirty-dollar book. “Do you ever go to Emily’s Pizzeria?” I chirped to one mark. “You can get a free pitcher of Coke with the purchase of a large two-topping.” “Emily’s has been closed for three months,” she informed me. I hung up to spare us both any more of my lies.

    As penance for these crimes of my youth, I listen to every single sales call that I get. I don’t buy, but I do listen. I won’t be needing free Coke, anyway. I recently got an email from the widow of an African king promising me a fortune in exchange for a small, temporary loan.

  • Enough Is Enough

    Last year Apple sold thirty-nine million iPods. Thirty-nine million. Not all in the United States, I grant you, but I have a hard time finding anyone between the ages of thirteen and thirty with a job or an indulgent parent who doesn’t own one. Riding a New York subway a couple of weeks ago, I was struck by the cacophony of low-level chirping. I counted at least twenty people—more than half the car—with ear buds. (Some might have been Zunes; I don’t know.)

    I mention this in the context of the proposed merger of the two satellite radio companies XM and Sirius, and a recent column in Advertising Age subtitled, “A Growing Glut of Advertising Clutter Threatens the [Radio] Medium.” I had to do a double take on that last one. Advertising Age pointing out the obvious … that there is waaaay too friggin’ much advertising on radio?

    The guy who wrote the column was much more politic than I am inclined to be. But he did admit, “If I were running a radio station today, I’d worry more about XM and Sirius than I would about my direct competitors.” By that he meant the similarly ad-choked classic rock, hot adult contemporary, lite adult contemporary, and yadda yadda stations across town.

    “For every ad that radio stations used to run, it now seems they run two. Radio,” he wrote, “in my opinion, has become RadiADo, with an extra ad inserted at every possible point in the programming.” RadiADo. Cute.

    The dilemma for radio-station owners is that when you bundle eight, ten, twelve ads together—some thirty seconds, some fifteen (there was even talk of trying to sell one-second ads)—and brand every traffic and weather report, news update, and DJ smoke break with another ad, pretty soon the whole chattering, numbing horde becomes unrecognizable to listeners and therefore of little value to Select Comfort mattresses or your friendly, predatory car dealer.

    Compared with those thirty-nine million iPods, satellite radio’s combined audience of roughly fourteen million subscribers isn’t much. (So-called “terrestrial radio”—the ad-choked game we’re talking about here—claims an audience of two hundred million.) But when you add thirty-nine million iPods in one year to fourteen million people paying $12.95 a month for mostly ad-free satellite and throw in the twenty-two million who claim to listen to advertising-free public radio, you’ve got a stark outline of a well-established trend.

    Being a cheap bastard, I haven’t popped for satellite (or an iPod) … yet. But I can tell you that my radio consumption these days consists almost entirely of sports (with all those “Snapper Mow ’em Down Innings”), news (ninety-five percent via public radio), and a smattering of sports talk. Music? Forget it. The deck in the car holds ten CDs. I’m good. But if I do want something different, I hit public radio’s (ad-free) The Current. Life is too short to waste another thirty seconds listening to some yob pitch me hair implants, “rare” diamonds, or “fuel-efficient” SUVs.

    If you’re thinking, “Screw you. You’re an out-of-touch geezer,” you’re probably right. But you ought to ask yourself if you’re drinking the same Kool-Aid as the radio (and TV) industry.

    And if you counter by pointing out that this screed is being published in an ad-supported magazine, you are right again. Not to belabor the fundamental difference between print and broadcast advertising, but there is that funky matter of choice. My eyes might drift over the La Perla lingerie ads in a slick magazine, but they can’t be held captive there for minutes on end. (OK, they can.) Print still offers the possibility for consumer discretion. Broadcast does not. Until the gamut of hucksters have run their course, you’ll get nothing more of what you tuned in to see or hear in the first place (and that’s presuming they’ll eventually get around to playing what you tuned in to hear in the first place).

    My first bet is that the FCC and Congress will eventually permit the XM-Sirius merger to go forward. My second is that super-salesman Mel Karmazin, current president of Sirius, former CEO of CBS, and the man who made Howard Stern “king of all media,” will do to satellite radio what he did to broadcast TV, namely, flood it with advertising. (XM and Sirius have something like three billion dollars in debt to deal with, and Stern just received an eighty-three-million-dollar “bonus” from Sirius, even though the company has yet to make a dime.)

    Asked by Wall Street analysts to explain how he was going to create profit from the merger, Karmazin explained, “The advertising line is going to contribute significantly in the future.”

    Make that thirty-nine million and one iPods.

  • The Debt

    For multifarious and age-old reasons the dense central city was girdled by a wide belt of poverty. Near the southern edge of this shabby cincture lay a large village. Within the village was a sandy square of sixty meters in which children played and adults gathered to talk. Everyone crossed it as they went about their business.

    Mustapha’s one-room, mud-brick hut sat hard on this square. Although he was a beggar, he did not call himself one, for he always said—to those he knew, at least—I’ll repay you in a week, or so. Fifty piasters here, a pound or two there, little more than pocket change, but enough so they sought to escape when they saw him coming. Even in an area as big as Cairo, the word got around, Watch out for Mustapha.

    It wasn’t that he could not work, for he was strong and quick-minded. But a regular job did not interest him. He held himself separate, as if he were above everyone else. Perhaps his choice of begging as a profession was an outcry against the irrelevance, alienation, and pitiful wages available to the lower classes.

    Because Mustapha kept late hours, his shutter was closed each morning when the young reporter, Youssef, rode through the square, his bicycle emitting a high-pitched screech upon each rotation of the pedals. Youssef did not earn much at the newspaper, where he was a junior reporter, junior in every way. The job was his because the editor was a friend of his uncle and because a bribe, collected by his family, had been paid. Not yet married, he lived with his parents, sister, grandmother, and his uncle’s family.

    The two men had been classmates at school, Youssef the kind of boy who got along with everyone, but the other children did not like Mustapha, whose gaze focused somewhere beyond one’s shoulder, as if he were calculating how to sneak up and bash his victim on the head. He took advantage of Youssef’s easy-going manner by copying his lessons and asking him for favors.

    On the way home one day three boys were beating Mustapha because of some coarse words he had said to one of them. Youssef saw this and rushed to Mustapha’s aid. Later, when the same boys caught Youssef alone, they punched and kicked him in retaliation. As he fell to the ground, he glimpsed Mustapha scurrying into a side street.

    The next day he confronted him. “Why didn’t you help me?”

    “I did not see you,” Mustapha replied. “I was on my way to visit my aunt. As you know, she lives on that street.”

    After they finished their schooling, the two saw each other only by chance, once at a restaurant where Youssef noted Mustapha was eating a more expensive meal than his own. Although these meetings were cordial, Youssef tensed, because it was just a matter of time before he asked him for money.

    One evening Youssef and Jameela, the woman he was dating at the time, exited the movie theater and stepped around a large pile of garbage. The village was enduring another of its garbage crises when, through corruption and incompetence, the money allocated for pickup—but not the garbage—disappeared. They were discussing the movie, Chahine’s The Destiny, when Mustapha stepped from behind the pile.

    “Ah, friend,” said Mustapha. “Was the movie a good one?” He still had that maddening habit of looking past one’s shoulder.

    “Quite good, yes. This was the third time I’ve seen it.”

    “And who is this lovely lady you’re with?”

    Youssef introduced Jameela.

    Mustapha said, “Youssef and I have been good friends since our school days together.” He proceeded to make many flattering and insincere comments to her. Then he motioned Youssef to the side. “I’m in a bit of a pinch. Can you spare twenty pounds? I’ll repay you in a week, or so.”

    What could Youssef say? To refuse a good friend would make him appear cheap in Jameela’s eyes.

    After Mustapha left, Jameela asked in a starstruck way, “Who was that guy?”

    “An old friend who turned out to be a big disappointment.” He hoped she hadn’t fallen for Mustapha’s act. Although Jameela was attractive, he had a rather prosaic assessment of her charms. As they walked, he said, “I’m still full from supper. Why don’t we skip the ice cream shop tonight?” He had eaten at home. Although his sister and grandmother were good cooks, the truth was, he no longer had enough money in his wallet for ice cream.

    Normally in times when the garbage was not picked up, the people dumped it in unofficial but historically used locations such as empty lots and seasonal washes. Then one day the trucks would appear and haul the piles away. But the new mayor and his friends had expensive tastes. The usual places were full; fresh piles sprouted. The newspapers kept track of them as if they were the scores of the soccer matches between the Reds and the Whites.

    Youssef was assigned to the garbage beat. They called him Garbage Boy. Each day his editor expected him to come up with a new story regarding the crisis. Of course he was not expected to find out where the money had gone—no one ever discovered that—and the newspaper would not print it if he did, because the newspapers had to be careful what they printed. Nevertheless it remained his shimmery ideal. The reality was that there was only so much that could be written about garbage. Soon he ran out of statistics to cite and minor officials to interview. He was reduced to collecting stories from the people, the inconvenience, babies bitten by rats, the smell. Cairo was suffering through its most brutal summer in years. The khamsin, the hot, sand-laden, southerly wind that normally blew itself out in April or May, had not yet ceased.

    As the heat grew, Mustapha’s week or so ballooned into three, then four, then six. Thus began the dance of avoidance in which borrower and lender became entwined in ways both comic and maddening. For instance, Youssef and Nur, a copywriter at the paper, went to a club in the central city to hear a techno band. He and Jameela weren’t going out much anymore. After a while he excused himself to use the bathroom. On the way, in the narrow space between the bar and the wall, there was Mustapha chatting up a horsey woman in a miniskirt. When he saw Youssef, he threw himself against her. When Youssef returned, the woman was still draped against the wall, but Mustapha had vanished.

    Another time, with Nur at a beach on the Nile, Youssef noticed Mustapha ambling their way along the water’s edge. Seeing no other way to avoid him, he waded into the current, lost his footing, and was swept away. Nur swam out and rescued him.

    And finally, on a day off from work, Youssef rode a bus to the east and hiked in the Al Mokattam hills that overlook the city, the Nile, and the fields beyond, to the Libyan Desert and the pyramids at Giza. The khamsin filled the air with dust, obscuring these details, but assuring a beautiful sunset. As he waited for the colors to develop, he worked himself into a comfortable position in the soft ground and read from a paperback copy of Ghassan Kanafani’s Men in the Sun. When he glanced up, there was Mustapha darting behind a dune. Why, he wondered, was he seeing him more lately than in all the years since school?

    But it was Mustapha who truly suffered from these encounters. Each of their families was a part of the vast underclass that struggle to lead respectable lives. By his choice of profession Mustapha had brought disgrace upon his. Each time he saw Youssef, he was reminded of the comparison others would make between them.

    Mustapha was moping on his door stone after being woken yet again by Youssef’s bicycle when a mother and her three children, each carrying a pail of garbage, entered the square. Undoubtedly they were headed for the dumping ground. On impulse he called to her, “Why not put your garbage here? It’s OK, no one will mind.”

    That was the start of it. Seeing the fresh heaps, others began dropping their garbage in the square. Mustapha approached anyone in the district who was carrying a bag or a bucket or pushing a cart. “Come, friend, no need to walk so far. Dump your garbage in front of my house.”

    When his neighbors found out who was responsible, a committee arrived at his door.

    “In times like these everyone has to make sacrifices,” he told them. “My house is closer than any of yours. The smell is not that bad. Pray for cool weather.”
    In truth the smell did bother him, but he did not spend much time at home, only a few hours to sleep each morning. Usually he was on the streets in the central city, because it was important for a man to be seen at his job, even if that job was begging.

    Inexorably the individual heaps became a monolithic whole. Since the people still had to pass through the square, the pile was crisscrossed with paths, like animal trails in an oasis. Eventually the pile became a lopsided hill with the steepest side cascading to Mustapha’s very door. He was safe now. Youssef had to pedal around the far side.

    About this time the editor said to Youssef, “We’re filling the entire issue today with garbage, although I trust your contribution will rise above that level. Do you have any bright ideas?”

    Youssef admitted he did not.

    “What about this fellow in your neighborhood who’s asking people to dump their garbage in front of his house?”

    “I don’t want to talk to him, boss.”

    “Why not?”

    “He owes me money.”

    “Perfect. Then he’ll have to talk to you.” When Youssef blenched, the editor added, “You need to toughen up, son, if you want to be a reporter.”

    The words stung, because his editor was right.

    “Now get out there.”

    “I’ll have to take my bicycle.”

    “You still don’t have a car?”

    “I can’t afford one.”

    “What do you spend your money on, that girl back in editing?”

    Youssef blushed. Nur was a costly blessing.

    “All right, take mine. But this is the last time. And make sure you have it back here by one o’clock.”

    Youssef parked the Fiat near the east side of the square. He marveled at the pile’s size. If all the garbage were heaped in a single place, it might make a Kilimanjaro tall enough for snow. Half hoping Mustapha was not there, he rapped on the door. When it scraped open, Mustapha’s pupils pinholed in the sudden flood of light. Irritation gave way to his public face.

    “Well if it isn’t Garbage Boy. Come in, come in.”

    “Don’t call me that.”

    “I heard they call you Garbage Boy at the paper.”

    “That doesn’t mean I like it.”

    Mustapha broke the dun silence. “Do you want tea?”

    “Tea would be good.”

    “Sit down while I prepare it.”

    Youssef sat at the table against the wall. “How do you stand it?” he asked after a while.

    “What?”

    “The smell.”
    Mustapha did not answer. He set a steaming cup before Youssef and sat sipping his own. “Do you remember Aziza, the fat girl? I saw her last night in the Citadel Quarter. She’s beautiful now.”

    “I thought she was beautiful then.”

    “You did?”

    “Her face, especially.”

    “You always were a dreamer.” He packed a hookah and offered it to Youssef, who shook his head. “Are you so high and mighty now that you won’t smoke with an old friend?”

    “I don’t smoke that stuff with anyone anymore.”

    Mustapha’s eyes went cold. “What are you doing here, Youssef?”

    “I want to interview you about the garbage.”

    “Ah, the garbage.”

    “Look, I don’t have much time. My editor needs his car back.”

    “I’ve wondered why a big-time reporter like you doesn’t have a car.”

    “And I wonder why you encourage them to dump in front of your place.”

    “What’s it worth to you?”

    Youssef’s brow knitted. “What do you mean?”

    “A big newspaper like yours should be willing to pay at least twenty pounds.”

    Blood rushed into Youssef’s head. He ought to walk out, but he would still need a story. Since Mustapha had no intention of repaying him anyhow, he said, “All right, we’ll call it even.”

    Ever so slightly, Mustapha’s mouth widened.

    “But only if you agree to let me interview you for free at any time in the future.” To emphasize his point, he banged his forearm—harder than he intended—on the table. “And you talk to me before you talk to another reporter.” This said, he sipped his tea and marveled at his boldness.

    Mustapha scratched his cheek before offering a toothy smile. “But of course! You are my friend!”

    His story was just that, a story, and not a good one. Luckily Youssef was already hip to the genteel art of journalistic embellishment. His editor was pleased.

    On the face of it the debt was settled, but still the people dumped. The side of the pile facing Mustapha’s lair resembled a giant bowel filled with silage garnished with plastic. Whenever he came home, he beat out the rats with a broom. Like candy they ate the poison he put down, and they snapped the traps, startling him from sleep.

    Lying on his pallet one morning, he heard voices unusually close and rushed outside. The people were balancing against the wall of the hut as they tiptoed around the glacier edge of the pile.

    “No, no, no!” he yelled. “Give me some privacy. Go around to the other side. There is more room over there.”

    Still, like cattle they came, bumping him in their haste to start their day. He went inside and drifted into a mean sleep. As the sun rose higher, the line slowed to a trickle. In the heat of the day few came.

    When he awoke, he was a man with a plan. In the tiny courtyard behind the hut lay a pitchfork abandoned by a previous tenant. Because north was the direction from which most would return in the evening, he would block that end first.

    The garbage was a compacted mass. The pitchfork was dull and two tines were missing. Each forkful stirred up mephitic odors. He tied a kerchief over his nose. As the dike rose, few were willing to scale it and risk the sweating, swearing, garbage-smeared wild man on the other side. By late afternoon it was as high as the pitchfork’s reach. Reeking, hands blistered, he went inside, drank some water and—because he was too filthy to sit on a chair—flopped to the tile floor. Soon he heard them milling. He laughed, giddy at the thought that they would have to walk around. After cleaning himself perfunctorily, for he still had the south barrier to build, he fixed a plate of food.

    As the sun slid behind Garbage Mountain—for that was how he now thought of it—he started on the second rampart. The air was cooler, and his technique with the pitchfork improved. When finished, he threw his filthy clothes on the bricks in the rear courtyard and washed himself in the basin. He did not feel like going out, but it was a pleasant evening, and the streets would be full.

    He puzzled over how to leave. If he climbed a dike, leaving evidence, however slight, of a successful traverse, some adventurer might follow. In the rear courtyard, which at one time had been part of the house itself, he stood on the rickety table next to the wall, hoisted himself to the top, and climbed down the scrawny baobab tree on the other side. Squeezing between neighbors’ walls, he made his way to the next street.

    In the wee hours he returned. He scrabbled up the baobab tree, ripping his shirt in the process. His night’s efforts had resulted in a piddling amount, most of which was spent on alcohol. Before retiring, he opened the shutter and admired his handiwork.

    Stomach queasy, head aching, he arose at midday. Each dike had a switchback worn into its side and a “V,” like a gun sight, creased each top. He screamed loud and long.

    Through the winter the garbage grew more and more monstrous. Surreptitiously at first, then openly, Allah, Jesus, and even Pharaonic deities were invoked. In conversation garbage dominated over gossip about movie stars, the weather, and life’s usual cruelties. The opposition Environmental Party took the lead in clamoring for action. Wearing tall, red rubber boots, the party’s new spokesman stood atop the piles and gave fiery speeches denouncing the unnamed scoundrels responsible. He also accepted donations.

    When, in the glimmering of spring, trucks hauled the piles away, those who didn’t know him said the Environmental Party had found a charismatic and effective new leader, and those to whom he was indebted wondered why Mustapha Said had suddenly become involved in politics at the ripe age of twenty-six. As for the new political reporter, Youssef Al-Kabsh, his star also rose. Whenever a contagion burbled in the cesspools of power, he was among the first to know.

  • The Doctor is In

    Kevin Turnquist, a psychiatrist for more than twenty years, currently cares for some of the most seriously ill patients in the Hennepin County public mental health system. The good doctor, who specializes in schizophrenia, has pretty much seen it all—such as the woman who believes that during sleep she grows extra limbs that are clandestinely harvested for Wendy’s. If that sounds outlandish, consider a recent study suggesting that one in two Americans will suffer a mental illness at some point in their lives. Nowhere does that feel truer than here in the North, where winter is widely regarded as the season of mental apocalypse. We caught up with Turnquist to discuss the reasons we crash and burn.

    Why do people get depressed, or is that a ridiculously simplistic question?
    That’s a great question because it goes along with the idea that there is a single cause of depression, which my profession and especially the drug companies would like to perpetuate. There are all kinds of depression. Some people react to loss. Some people react to day length. But one commonality that seems to go across all the types is hippocampal atrophy.

    The hippocampus seems to thrive on new memories and experiences. Should people take more vacations?
    I think everybody should take more vacations! The Australians and people like that who get six weeks to two months every year, they seem to be happier people than us.

    Which produces more endorphins, good sex or good food?
    If you’re starving you might get an endorphin release from food. But there is this hierarchy of needs and I think most people would vote for the good sex.

    How well do psychiatrists understand the human brain?
    We don’t. We’ve learned a lot in the last ten to fifteen years, but look at how that’s translated into action. If you see five different psychiatrists, and you have a mental problem, you are likely to get five different diagnoses. Fortunately it doesn’t make much difference because whatever diagnosis you get, you are likely to get the same hodgepodge of medications regardless: an antipsychotic, a mood stabilizer, an antidepressant, a minor tranquilizer. It’s fair to say that we don’t know what causes any mental disorders and we don’t know how any of our medications actually work.

    Yet sometimes they do work.
    Well, the bath of surprise worked, too! Where people would be led down this walkway and fall through a trapdoor blindfolded into icy water. Almost anything will work if you induce the expectation of change.

    What’s so bad about antidepressants?
    The new ones seem to decrease the intensity of the connection between what you think about and what you feel. It’s been likened to turning the brightness knob on your TV all the way up. So everything kind of looks the same. And you don’t really feel that bad or worried about anything, but on the other hand, nothing touches you in the way that it normally would.

    Should the emphasis be on therapy instead?
    I think that in the next ten or twenty years, the research will show that good psychotherapy produces genuine brain changes. I don’t want to put you in the position of having to explain amygdala versus hippocampus.

    I appreciate that.
    But as you start to use brain structures, the pathways become reinforced. If you are exposed to any stimulus for ninety minutes, your brain starts to build new synapses to accommodate this. We start to form new symbols, because we construct our reality with symbols, for self and other. I’ve always thought one of the key elements of good therapy is being in the presence of someone who can tolerate you for who you are, and then starting to identify with that attitude.

    Why don’t we understand the brain better?
    It’s so complex. We’ve taken a very reductionistic approach, which works for other organs, like the liver. But the brain doesn’t yield to that sort of thing because there is brain and then there is mind.

    How would you define brain versus mind?
    Oh, I wouldn’t.

    In what ways are we mentally similar to our primate cousins, chimpanzees?
    Sex and aggression are the two basic drives. You watch humans on the freeway and interacting with each other and we’re no different than apes fighting over who is going to sit on the sunny rock.

    And the main difference between us and them?
    They’re shorter.

    How do we fare mentally in Minnesota?
    When you look at statistics, we kind of fall in the middle in terms of mental health. I do think there is something to this latitude and seasonal affective disorder. I think for some of us it tends to make us much more unstable than we would be otherwise. I use a light box every morning, during the winter anyway.

    Are northern people more neurotic than those from other parts of the world?
    I’ve never seen any studies on it, but intuitively I think there is something to it. If you are living close to the equator and the weather is always pretty much the same, you don’t have this winter to prepare for every year. You might not develop the same brain structures that you do if you are living somewhere where you are looking at six months of cold and dark. And the parts of the brain that are involved, frontal lobe structures, allow us to say, “What might happen?” “How can I prepare for what might happen?” As soon as you start to really grow those structures, you can think of all sorts of terrible things that might happen. I’m really good at it. I can think of a million terrible things that may happen in the next minute.

    I guess we have “spring mania” to look forward to, the rejoinder to seasonal affective disorder.
    Right. The classic example is Vincent van Gogh. His wild stuff was done in the spring with brilliantly intense colors, and in the fall he tended to cut off body parts.

  • Dance Competition

    On the O’Shaughnessy stage in St. Paul, forty dancers get up in glittering military chic and tap in perfect unison to Janet Jackson’s Rhythm Nation 1814. They toss off complex steps, inject some get-down hip-hop moves, maneuver in kaleidoscopic patterns. A panel of judges scrutinizes the proceedings as the audience hoots and hollers. This is not the touring version of So You Think You Can Dance? It’s a corps of teenagers from the Larkin Dance Studio in Maplewood, performing at the Hall of Fame Dance Challenge.

    From March through June each year, hundreds of local kids—from tots on up to those about to graduate from high school—participate in regional and national dance competitions like this one. They and their parents spend thousands of dollars and turn families, friends, and relatives into rabid fans. Unlike the poky dance-school recitals familiar to some, with their homemade costumes, dinky theaters, and ragged lines of little girls rigid with stage fright, these spectacles play out in major venues before audiences of competition veterans with high expectations.

    At dozens of studios scattered throughout the suburbs, and in outstate cities like St. Cloud and Brainerd, children train in tap, ballet, jazz, and break-dance in hopes of eventually making it to a national championship. The larger studios, such as Larkin and the Summit School of Dance, with studios in Plymouth and Wayzata, enroll more than a thousand kids each year. Students of competition dance, as it’s known, can spend twenty hours a week sweating with their teams while their parents shell out up to a thousand dollars a month on classes, costumes, entry fees, travel, and housing.

    “Competition dance became a fad in the 1970s, in the South and on the East Coast,” said Shirley Larkin, who founded the Larkin Studios in the early 1980s and was one of the first locals to offer classes in competition dance. “I was against the idea, but when I finally attended a competition in New York, I thought, ‘My kids can do that.’ By the end of the 1980s, if you weren’t doing competitions, you were out of business.”

    Competitive studios exist in a universe separate from the galaxy of professional ballet companies, modern dance ensembles, and culturally specific dance companies working in the Twin Cities. Most of the performers and audience members at dance competitions think of dance more as sport or entertainment than fine art. Competition dancers purge their routines of what they might consider esoteric artiness by pumping up the adrenalin. They pack maximum energy, enthusiasm, and technical virtuosity into a few minutes of pure power, with every other move culminating in a flip, splits, or a trick like the ubiquitous Scorpion’s Tail, in which the performer pulls her leg up behind her head like a contortionist. Meanwhile, more aesthetically oriented dance fans believe that the “sell-it” approach to dance in competitions is antithetical to movement as an art form. “In terms of energy output, some of these routines are the dance equivalent of wham, bam, thank you ma’am,” said one Minneapolis modern dance choreographer.

    “Sure, I push for bigger and better,” acknowledged Michele Larkin, who, with her mother Shirley, co-owns the Larkin Studios. “Three pirouettes isn’t doing it anymore—I make them go for nine.” Larkin teaches and rehearses seven days a week and has choreographed many prize-winning routines. She criticizes some college and university dance programs for “pooh-poohing competition kids. Their attitude is that these kids have to start from scratch because they have learned too many tricks. Instead, they should appreciate and embellish what these talented dancers bring.”

    By the same token, students accustomed to dancing at full throttle all the time may feel confused or even insulted when they enter an academic dance program that asks them to radically realign their posture, or to lie on the floor and concentrate on breathing. “These kids sometimes have a totally different view of dance than we do,” said Toni Pierce-Sands, co-director of the TU Dance company and an instructor at the University of Minnesota. “But they bring an energy and confidence to performing—they really understand that.”

    National enterprises with monikers like Showstopper and Star Systems are the competition world’s power centers. They organize the events, hire dance professionals to adjudicate them, and award prizes to teams and individuals that range from honorary plaques to cash awards and scholarships. Studios pay entry fees, collected from individual students, and compete in categories based on age, style, and the number of dancers (ranging from solos to groups—or lines—of forty or more). Style categories include jazz, tap, ballet, and lyrical, the last being a mix of ballet, modern, and acrobatics that focuses on interpreting songs. Routines can run anywhere from three to eight minutes, and often incorporate elaborate costumes and sets.

    Studios that accumulate the most points overall at local events become eligible to compete at national events, often held in sunny destinations like Las Vegas or Daytona Beach. Most studios compete in three to six regional competitions per year, and go on to at least one national final.

    At last year’s Hall of Fame Challenge, eight-year-olds in glitzy orange sequined costumes were strutting their stuff to “Great Balls of Fire” at O’Shaughnessy by 8:30 a.m. Watching grade-schoolers channel showgirls brought up eerie echoes of JonBenet Ramsey. Indeed, many parents would doubtless prefer that their daughters waft gracefully as Nutcracker snowflakes rather than shake their booties while Jerry Lee Lewis howls (or vamp to Rick James’ “Super Freak,” as in the recent hit film Little Miss Sunshine). But parents of competition dancers see their children growing in positive ways. “My daughter was so shy, she was almost invisible,” said one mother. “Now that she’s dancing, she’s become confident and outgoing.”

    Later that day, the Larkin Junior Line of twelve- to fourteen-year-olds shimmied to a different drummer: The harem motif (one guy, many girls) of their Middle Eastern-themed number was a clever artistic solution to the chronic shortage of males in competition dance. The performers undulated in fluid, faux-Oriental moves punctuated by flips into handstands and dives to the floor—an impressive display of technical fireworks and choreographic savvy for which Michele Larkin won the Junior Line Choreography Award.

    At the Hall of Fame Dance Challenge, the audience shouted and applauded for wildly diverse routines that ran from 8 a.m. up to midnight: a 1920s flapper number; a lyrical tribute to the bond between fathers and sons, featuring a line of seven boys; a routine in which girls in tuxedos spun like tops, hats balanced on their toes, to Depeche Mode’s “Personal Jesus.”

    While this mix of poignancy and pizzazz, spirituality and spectacle may seem jarring, it is certainly part of a time-honored American tradition. The commingling of serious art and popular culture has enlivened the arts here for at least a couple of centuries. It gave rise to Bruce Springsteen’s heartland rock, for example, and the populist notion that Dolly Parton and Zubin Mehta are equally worthy of Kennedy Center Honors—not to mention the peculiarly American sentiment that both athletes and artists get validated by keeping their eyes on the prize.

    The antic eclecticism of competition culture is firmly anchored in the bedrock of family life. Parents work backstage, building and moving sets, and sell tickets out front. Dads act as security guards. Many studios actually have dad, mom, and even father/daughter teams that compete in special performance categories. Loren Johnson, interviewed while rehearsing a routine with several other dads to Elvis Presley’s “Jailhouse Rock” at the Larkin studio, got involved so that he could see his daughter once in a while. “She’s at Larkin 24/7,” he said.

    The work ethic and team spirit that infuse dance competitions appeal to many parents, especially those of boys, who are still a vast minority in this heavily female culture. As with most other dance forms, boys are given advantages: scholarships, reductions on class fees, and, some believe, extra “penis points” in competitions. “Boys are attracted by jazz and tap because they like to make noise,” said Linda Muir, a teacher at the Summit School. “They like to perform gross motor moves, and they enjoy competing. [The competitions are] quantifiable for boys, and for their fathers,” that is, everything ultimately translates into a score.

    “I liked the camaraderie of studios. If you screw up, everyone suffers,” said Nick Straffacia, who started dancing at age three at the Northland School of Dance in Champlin. In 2005, when he was eighteen, he joined the Minnesota Dance Theatre, where he was one of the few studio dancers to make an immediate transition to a professional ballet company. There, he “was expected to be more mature and self-motivated.” He has since continued his dance training at New York University.

    Most studio kids, however, rarely pursue careers in dance as adults, and one reason is their lack of exposure to professional concert dance. Megan McClellan and Brian Sostek, co-directors of the popular Minneapolis-based company Sossy Mechanics, view the bridging of the gap between the art and studio dance worlds as a win-win endeavor. They’ve produced a highly successful series of performances called Bright Lights/Dance in the Dark that mixes studio, street, and professional dancers.

    That strategy translates into “more audience for us and more exposure for them,” said McClellan, speaking of the studio kids. She herself studied at the Keane Sense of Rhythm, a tap dance studio in St. Paul, and competed at many events before crossing over to modern dance. She and Sostek maintain that each system has much to offer the other. “In competitions, you learn about dance as a performance art,” she said. “It’s always about trying to show off and having fun. On the other hand, studio kids often have a false sense of what’s required for a professional dance life. They learn dance as a spectacle full of gimmicky stuff that they will never be asked to do anywhere else.”

    True, a dancer auditioning for, say, the James Sewell Ballet may never be asked to demonstrate a Sea Jump—a stunt that involves rolling up from the floor over one’s shins into a backbend jump and simultaneously grabbing the feet from behind. But, McClellan insists, “learning these tricks makes you a huge risk-taker. You go for extremes and you’re not afraid to fall on your butt and get up again.”

    And, given that contemporary ballet and modern dance increasingly demand performers with Olympic-level gymnastic skills who can also move at warp speed, what hotshot choreographer wouldn’t break a leg for a chance to work with kids like these?

    Competition Calendar

    Showstopper
    April 13–15
    Northrop Auditorium, Minneapolis
    www.showstopperonline.com

    Hall of Fame Dance Challenge
    April 20–22
    St. Paul RiverCentre, Roy Wilkins Auditorium
    www.halloffamedance.com

    Showbiz
    April 25–29
    Minneapolis Convention Center
    www.showbiztalent.com

    Starpower
    May 4–6
    Minneapolis Convention Center
    www.starpowertalent.com

  • Sex and Superheroes

    The blank page is an intimidating thing, especially for a writer who only manages to spew out a couple thousand words per month. Trying to write a significant eight-hundred-word piece every month seems harder than doing an essay two or three times a week, as most columnists do. The formula (take a bit of news, maybe make a few calls on the topic, then tell everyone what to think about it) doesn’t work so well when the news may be thirty days old by the time the column is read. At best, this will be eleven days old before the magazine hits the streets—and even older by the time readers make time for it.

    So, how do you remain fresh in the era of the Internet, when your “Use by:” date is already expired by the time you hit the streets? You don’t write about Alberto Gonzales or Anna Nicole Smith (OK, I wouldn’t write about Anna Nicole at any time), and you sure don’t discuss the weather. I’ve pored over the pages of random notes I took this month with the hope that something would pop out at me as worthy of a column, but the notes that did were clearly the scribblings of someone who was slogging toward the end of a long Minnesota winter.

    For example: “Only when the economic benefits become apparent will we do what we should have done all along”; or, “Paradise will not come to Minneapolis because of technological advances like Shot Spotter”; and, “A belief in rationality gives us hope when the reality of our savagery makes it unlikely a rational approach will work”; and finally, “Wash your car.”

    Clearly, I need a little more time under the full-spectrum lamp. And soon.

    But it will be spring before this writing hits the streets. And there are other notes in the little black book I carry around that aren’t so dreary.

    I was in New York a few weeks ago, and in addition to the Armory Show [see this story], I also took in another art event worth mentioning: Comic-Con, the national convention for comic books and all things related. The Javits Center was bursting with all sorts of comics-related booths, from the displays of classic comics dating to my youth, to new video games, to the work of contemporary artists and writers, many of whom were autographing and selling their original art.

    The sights were both amusing and poignant to someone like me who grew up learning to read from Superman and Batman comics. I saw familiar comics that I used to own, before my mother bundled them up with my baseball cards and tossed them the day after I left for college. The smiles those brought were exceeded only by those engendered as I watched people my age sort through the stacks—although the current motives were different. In place of the revelry of youth, there was the determination of the collector. “I’m looking for issue 222. I can’t find it anywhere,” moaned one searcher. “Is that the ‘Juggernaut’ issue?” another commiserated. “That’s a tough one.”

    Alongside these moneyed acquisitors were the young people who looked how you’d expect people to look after spending too much time in dusky basements playing Dungeons and Dragons. Comic-Con was their paradise, for not only were they surrounded with their obsessions—the games—but the gaming companies had hired people to demo the games. And these people were young women. And by young women, I mean pretty young women with gothic tattoos, medieval piercings, and T-shirts with cleavage approximating that displayed on the black-light posters that line the bedroom walls of such boys.

    There was also anime. For those of you who have missed the latest development in graphic novels, anime is the Japanese version that combines sex and swordplay into one heady fantasy for the American adolescent. You may have seen the iconic saucer-eyed schoolgirls as you flash by the cartoon channel on cable. At Comic-Con, the young men were attracted by live saucer-eyed anime dolls, who were dressed like Brooklyn Catholic school eighth graders, except for the fact that their Peter Pan-collared blouses were open to a point that would have made Sister Mary Catherine fatally apoplectic.

    At the Grimm Fairy Tales booth, there were a similarly sexy Alice in Wonderland and Little Miss Muffet. And, just down the aisle from them sat Tiffany Taylor, Playboy’s Miss November of 1998. Miss November has nothing to do with comics, but everything to do with fantasy. You could buy a personalized, autographed nude photo of her for twenty dollars, or just stand next to her for a photo with your own camera for five dollars.

    I might have gone for it if she had looked just a little bit more like Lois Lane.

  • Country Girl

    Over the last few months, I have met with Fozia Mussa several times to hear about her journey from sheltered teenager in a tiny Somali village to life as a working Minneapolis mother of five children (ranging from nine months to twelve years).

    Out of respect for Somali custom, I could not interview Mussa alone, and certainly not in private. Instead, she and I would convene along with several of her Somali friends at restaurants close to their college in Bloomington.

    Without exception, we were greeted at these dining establishments with curious stares and occasional sneers from white patrons, one day prompting a companion of ours to comment: “I don’t like this place. These people are fucking racist.” Looking up from my notepad I could see her point; the whole place really was gawking.

    Mussa, however, paid little attention to the apparent xenophobia at the International House of Pancakes. Impeccably put together in lovely flowing robes and scarves, she would focus intently on my questions and on the memories they stirred of a place she has not seen in sixteen years. She was unfailingly gracious in answering the many queries that arose about the events that caused her to flee her homeland and eventually join a community of Somali refugees in Minnesota that has grown to more than twenty-five thousand people.

    On one occasion, I related an incident I’d heard about that had taken place at a rally in January for the local Somali population. The event, which was held at the Minneapolis Convention Center, was organized as a way for the local Somali population to express solidarity with the struggling government of that embattled East African nation, and to strengthen ties between community members. The evening featured live videoconference speeches by President Abdullahi Yusuf Ahmed and Prime Minister Ali M. Geddi. Moments into the president’s talk, the crowd’s attention was suddenly diverted from the big screens to the floor. Two teenage Somali girls, one dark skinned and the other light, were arguing. “He’s not the president of my clan,” the dark-skinned girl complained. “Why do we have to have this big celebration?”

    “You may be jealous,” the other girl said, “but we are all the same people, regardless of clan, and he is our president.”

    “Is not.”

    “Is too.”

    They started to fight. In an instant the darker girl pulled out a knife, sliced the other girl from ear to chin, and took off running. Security guards arrived minutes later, but the Somalis had closed ranks; nobody knew anything. By the time police showed up, there was no one left to talk—including the victim, who had been whisked away by friends.

    As I told this story, Mussa’s usual infectious smile vanished, replaced by an expression of grief.

    “My people have lived through a lot, Jonny,” she said in her unwavering, gentle tone, using the name only she and her Somali friends call me. “The ones who experienced the civil war, they brought their fight with them. Those Somalis like me, who left earlier, we understand that in America we are all Somali.” —Jon Lurie

     

    I was lucky. In October 1991, just weeks before the civil war began, I managed to get out of Somalia. I was about fourteen. The people who were not so lucky—the people who stayed and saw terrible things, did terrible things, or had terrible things done to them—are different from those like me, who got out. It’s easy to tell Somali people in Minnesota who lived through the civil war; they often have this crazy look on their faces that scares me. Some of them brought their hatred for people from other Somali clans to America; others brought their fear.

    Today, I’m thirty-two or thirty-three—I’m not certain exactly when I was born—studying to be a doctor, living in South Minneapolis, and taking care of elderly Somali people in their homes. Some of my clients talk to me about the war. They say, “I saw people killed in front of me; I saw them blown up by roadside bombs.”

    One lady’s right arm is missing. It was cut off at the elbow after she stepped in front of some men who were trying to kill her brother. And then they killed her brother anyway. She seems pretty normal, but when she forgets to take her medication I’m afraid to be around her.

    The first time she saw me she said, “Who are you? Which clan are you from?”

    I said, “I’m Somali, you’re Somali, that’s it. Don’t worry about me.”

    And she said, “OK, you’re good,” and she kissed me on each cheek.

    I never tell clients which clan I’m from, and I never ask. Even if we are close. Because it’s not good, you know. Bringing up these things can only lead to trouble.

  • Marathon Man

    Beyond a long window that offered a panoramic view of the Minneapolis skyline, the end-of-the-workday exodus was already under way. Traffic was snarled on the streets stretching all the way downtown. Dave St. Peter had his back to the window, and he was looking and sounding like a man whose day was just getting started. St. Peter has a big, open, Midwestern face—it could be the face of a small-town high-school principal or insurance salesman—and he somehow manages to come across as both relaxed and impatient. He also looks like a guy who needs to duck into the men’s room several times a day to address his permanent five o’clock shadow. 

    “My dad was an accountant,” St. Peter said. “And I love my dad to death, but I knew I didn’t want to be an accountant. I wanted to do something I was really passionate about. I grew up a huge sports fan, and I was just hoping I could end up doing something along those lines. I used to think that maybe I’d be a sports information director somewhere. I can definitely tell you that there was never a day, never a moment, when I could have imagined I’d be sitting where I’m sitting right now.”

    Where St. Peter is “sitting right now,” and where he has been sitting since November 2002, is in the president’s chair at the Minnesota Twins’ Metrodome offices. On a late afternoon in early March, he was up to his elbows in preparations for his eighteenth season with the ball club, at the end of his rope with the ongoing wrangling over land acquisition for the team’s new ballpark, and still managing to do a pretty convincing impersonation of a man who loves his job.

    St. Peter’s story is the sort of improbable Horatio Alger yarn that seemed to have vanished from American business in the age of hotshot MBA programs and the get-rich-quick booms fueled by Wall Street and the Internet.

    St. Peter graduated from the University of North Dakota in Grand Forks in 1989 and set out for the Twin Cities with a marketing degree in hand and the modest goal of simply getting his foot in the door somewhere. He had been raised in Bismarck, North Dakota, the middle kid in a family of five children (he has two brothers and two sisters), and, like a lot of people just out of college, he was ambitious but a bit vague regarding where exactly his dreams might lead him.

    Despite his long tenure with the team, St. Peter is still only forty years old, which makes him one of the youngest team presidents in Major League Baseball. Other than a very brief stint with the North Stars in 1989, he’s never worked anywhere else, and, over the course of his Twins career, he has, by his own account, spent time in “every corner of the organization.”

    “Coming to the Twin Cities was in itself a huge move for me,” St. Peter said. “You’re talking about a kid who used to think that going to Fargo was a big deal. I didn’t know anybody and didn’t have the slightest idea what to expect when I came here, but I always felt that if I could get an opportunity nobody would ever outwork me and I’d get noticed.”

    He got his break with the Twins when he was offered an unpaid internship in the marketing department in 1990. Mark Weber, at the time the team’s director of promotions, was the guy who originally brought St. Peter into the fold, and he remembers the qualities that distinguished the new kid right out of the blocks.

    “Teams didn’t do as much in terms of promotion back then,” Weber said. “We had a very small staff; there were three of us, including Dave, so he got thrown right into the fray. He was responsible for a lot of the communication with players in terms of pre-game activities and working with some of our corporate partners. After a week you could already see that he had what it took to succeed in what is a very challenging environment. He had a great work ethic and tremendous passion.”

    Talk to anybody involved in baseball at the Major League level and he’ll invariably mention the 162-game season and the ridiculous demands it makes on everybody in an organization. “The number of hours you have to work in that business is beyond comprehension,” Weber said. “During the season you’re often at the ballpark from 8:30 in the morning until 10:30 or 11:00 at night. It can be an incredible challenge and it’s definitely not for everybody. But right away you sensed that Dave could both survive and thrive in that atmosphere. I’m not going to claim that I knew he was one day going to be president of the team, but I definitely felt that wherever he ended up he was going to be successful.”

     

    Halfway through St. Peter’s internship the club offered him a full-time position. There was a bit of a hitch, though—the job wouldn’t be within the front office, or even within the confines of the Metrodome. What the Twins were offering was a decidedly unglamorous managerial position in the team’s Twins Pro Shop retail outlet in Richfield.

    “I’ll admit that I had to sort of pause and ask myself if I really wanted to work in retail,” St. Peter said. “But I also recognized that this was an opportunity to actually get paid, receive benefits, and be a part of the Twins organization, so ultimately it became a pretty easy decision.”

    St. Peter ran the Pro Shop from the summer of 1990 through February of 1992. By all accounts sales went through the roof. St. Peter acknowledged as much, but deflected credit. “That had a whole lot less to do with me,” he said, “and a lot more to do with Kirby Puckett, Jack Morris, and the rest of those guys who won the World Series in ’91.” He admitted, though, that his stretch in Richfield was a wholly positive experience. “In terms of managing staff, developing customer-service skills, and really learning to understand our fans at a very grassroots level, it was invaluable,” St. Peter said. “Those Pro Shops are a ticket outlet, but they’re also a place where the average guy stops in to buy a cap or to complain about everything from ticket prices to the lousy pitching performance the night before. That experience really helped me to learn how important this team is to the community.”

    After St. Peter’s success in Richfield, the team offered him a newly created position—communications manager—in the front office. In many ways, the move represented a recognition on the part of the organization that the game was changing dramatically. “This was really the first time the Twins had a media-relations person devoted exclusively to the business side of the operation,” St. Peter said. “This predates the stadium issue, but if you really look at it, we were ahead of the curve. I took that job in 1992, and since then there has probably been as much or more stuff written about the business of baseball as there has been about the game itself.”

    St. Peter’s move into the Twins’ front office, and his subsequent rise through the ranks, came during the most challenging period in the team’s history, both from a franchise standpoint and in terms of systemic turmoil throughout the business. The growing economic disparity between the big-market and small-market teams led to the impasse between the players union and management that resulted in the 1994 strike and the first-ever cancellation of a World Series. The increasingly grim economic realities hit the local franchise particularly hard; attendance declined as the team endured eight straight losing seasons from 1993-2000. And, as flashy new ballparks (and revenue juggernauts) opened all around the Major Leagues, the Twins found themselves embroiled in an agonizingly protracted and frequently contentious battle for a new stadium of their own.

    The low point for the Twins came in the autumn of 2001, when Commissioner Bud Selig announced that the team was being targeted for contraction—this following the club’s first winning season in almost a decade.

    But the next year the team pushed the contraction threat to the back burner in spectacular fashion, by winning the Central Division before losing the American League Championship Series to the big-market Anaheim Angels. St. Peter assumed the presidency following that season, and the team has been on a roll ever since, winning three of the last four Central titles and stockpiling talent up and down the organization.

    “There’s no doubt that we went through a very dark period as a franchise,” St. Peter said. “We sort of hit bottom with the contraction thing, but we had a stretch in the late ’90s nineties where I can tell you pretty candidly that there was a lot of apathy in terms of our product. We’d had a lot of challenges, with [general manager] Andy MacPhail moving to the Cubs, the early retirements of Hrbek and Puckett, and the failed stadium efforts. It was pretty scary to think that we opened the decade winning a World Series and ended it with a lot of people maybe wondering whether they really cared about the Twins anymore.”

    With Jerry Bell giving up day-to-day management of the franchise to focus on getting a new stadium built, the challenge for St. Peter and the Twins’ front office was to stabilize the business operations and get the focus back on the players and the game itself, and away from the divisive politics surrounding the stadium push and the sport’s ever-exploding economics. St. Peter gives the 2001 team a lot of credit for the organization’s ultimate turnaround. “There are very few guys left from that team,” he said, “but that year we unveiled our ‘Get to Know ’Em’ ad campaign and then got off to a 14-3 start. The combination of those things went a long way toward restoring some credibility for us with our fans. That team really connected with people, and that season created an incredible amount of momentum as it relates to marketing our team and building our identity around the players. That was a very conscious decision on our part, and we’ve been able to build on that momentum year after year. Of course that only works when you’re as blessed as we have been to have guys who are not only good players, but who are also accessible, who are tremendous spokespeople for the franchise, and who have for the most part been—knock wood—wonderful role models.”

    St. Peter also has praise for the often-reviled owner of his ball club. “I’m sure his patience was tested plenty of times,” St. Peter said. “But Carl Pohlad stayed the course through all the chaos. He’s been incredibly loyal to his staff, and that’s created real stability within the organization. If you really look at it, in the last twenty-plus years we’ve had two team presidents, two general managers, and two field managers. We have the longest tenured scouting director and farm director in all of baseball. What that all boils down to is continuity; we have a lot of people who’ve been in this organization and in their positions for a very long time. We know each other, and over time we’ve developed an agreed-upon philosophy about the way we go about things both on and off the field.”

     

    Most baseball fans have a pretty good idea regarding the basic responsibilities of the manager and general manager of a Major League team. The president, however, occupies a hazier sort of position in the public’s mind. So what exactly does the president of the Minnesota Twins do?

    The answer, if you’re Dave St. Peter, is a little bit—and sometimes a lot—of everything.

    “I’m sure it varies from team to team,” St. Peter said. “But at the end of the day, I think the core responsibilities are the same. You’re responsible for managing the baseball team as a business and as a public trust. And in the Twins organization, the business and baseball operations have always been one and the same, so I work very closely and collaboratively with [general manager] Terry Ryan. We deliver Terry a budget and try to give him the dollars and resources that are going to allow him to put a competitive team on the field. It’s Terry’s job to work within that budget and manage the personnel of our baseball team. But if we’re going to be successful we have to be able to work well together and bounce stuff off each other. Very rarely is Terry recommending something to ownership that I’m not on board with, and vice versa. I think we do a pretty good job of working together in lockstep.”

    That, it turns out, is a seriously shorthand version of St. Peter’s job description. His co-workers will tell you that the team president is a guy who likes to be involved in every area of the business, from ticket sales and corporate sponsorships to advertising and promotions.

    Patrick Klinger, the Twins’ vice president of marketing, was hired by St. Peter in 1999, and like his boss (and pretty much everybody else in the organization) his first gig with the team was as an intern. “Dave knows more about every element of this operation than anybody around,” Klinger said. “I don’t think there’s a job in the organization he couldn’t do. For a guy in his position he’s as committed as anyone I’ve seen. Even as his responsibilities have grown, and with all the ballpark stuff, he’s still very involved in the day-to-day operations and wants to know what’s going on in every department. He also has a lot of good ideas, and doesn’t mind getting down in the trenches and getting dirt under his fingers. There isn’t anybody in the office who works longer hours. Dave’s good at preaching balance, but he’s not very good at practicing what he preaches.”

    St. Peter admitted as much, but insisted that he’s working on it. He and his wife Joanie have three pre-teen boys, and this year, he said, he intends to help coach Little League. “I may end up missing a game here or there,” he said. “I’m trying to find ways to create more balance and be there as a dad, but the reality is that I’m going to be here most of the time. It’s just the nature of the job. From the very beginning it was drilled into me that eighty-one nights a year what’s happening down here is the most important thing going on in the state of Minnesota.”

    Given that grind, you’d think that a guy in St. Peter’s position would have frequent occasion to look at the folks in the Vikings’ front office with a little bit of envy, but he just laughed at that notion. “I’ve never understood how you could play just one game a week,” he said. “I literally can’t imagine working for an NFL team. It would be like having ten weeks of vacation. I say this all the time: The NFL is a country club. The baseball season’s a marathon, and that’s a badge of honor for those of us who thrive on this atmosphere. It’s all I’ve ever known, and what we’re going through right now is the best time of the year. There’s nothing better than spring training and the anticipation of opening day.”

     

  • Dérive

    Always up for an experiment, Flaneur Productions distributed a top-secret passage from an obscure work of literature to a group of six local performers earlier this year. Each was instructed to use the text (still secret as of press time), along with the show’s creepy venue (a former coffin factory), as inspiration for the beginning of a twenty-minute “situationist stroll,” or dérive in the French—the result being that the collected works will share a point of origin but drift from there on. The iconoclastic imaginations tapped for this showcase include a veritable who’s-who of the local experimental-theater scene: John Bueche of the Bedlam Theatre company, Charles Campbell from the site-specific performance troupe Skewed Visions, and Kristin Van Loon and Arwen Wilder of the renegade dance duo HIJACK. 1707 Jefferson St. N.E., Minneapolis; 612-203-9560; www.flaneurproductions.com