Category: Blog Post

  • Do Bees Even Have Knees?

    swarm.JPG

    Yeah, they bug me too … like when I’m sitting on a sticky hay bale trying to shove a cider-brined brat with apple-onion relish into my face at my favorite orchard, and there’s nothing but the buzzing and the swatting.

    But.

    Have you heard about the bee paradox? It’s a full-blown mystery worthy of some reading.

    Read this.
    And then this.
    And finally this.

    And if you go into Figlio and catch Chef Rex, well he’ll just about talk your ear off on the subject.

    But I think yellow-jackets are still fair game.

  • Who We Thought They Were

    Is anyone surprised that the absurd quarterback situation bit the Vikings today, resulting in a 20-17 overtime loss to the Lions?

    There are precious few positions that are absolutely crucial in team sports. But quarterback ranks with hockey goalie and starting pitcher as a spot where a markedly subpar performance almost always dooms your ballclub. Surely coach Brad Childress knows this, so he is either arrogant enough to believe he can do with Tavaris Jackson what the Eagles did with Donovan McNabb, stupid enough to believe he won’t get fired if he turns last year’s 6-10 into the same or worse this season, or he has the word of the owner that he has at least another year after this one–and believes it. Which, again, makes him either very arrogant or very stupid.

    Jackson seems like a good dude, and admirably accepted the heat for a terrible, terrible performance today. But that’s really about the only positive thing you can say about him right now. All four of his interceptions were cringe-inducing, not a single one tipped by a defender or bouncing in or off a receiver. Instead, they revealed a lack of judgment, a lack of touch, and a lack of self-possession in more ways than one. It is really difficult to imagine this guy approaching the caretaker status of a Trent Dilfer, let alone someone who can win you ballgames on his own. I know it takes time to learn, and young QBs inevitably look shaky, but c’mon, last week’s ugly squeaker over Atlanta is the current highpoint of his career, which is exactly what you’d expect from a guy whose best attribute was being a stud athlete, and who didn’t even play major college football.

    So far almost everything is going according to form with these Vikings. Most of their supposed strengths are indeed strong, but not nearly strong enough to overcome their obviously crippling weaknesses. I don’t pretend to follow the game as closely as I do pro hoops, or even baseball, but I have seen seven of their eight and half quarters thus far this season (including today’s entire contest) and am myself arrogant or stupid enough to spout off about my impressions.

    **Adrian Peterson was even more impressive this week than on opening day. Yeah, I know his numbers were mediocre at best, but Peterson bounced off the first guy to hit him at least eight times today, and bounced off multiple people at least three or four, including that beautiful run–a mix of grit, lateral threading and that glorious speed of his–to set up Jackson’s arm-stretched running TD for the only six by the Vikes’ offense. At least ten times he picked up substantially more yardage than an average back would have garnered. One of his first carries of the day, an off tackle play to the left, wasn’t there for him and his jag to the sideline seemed to be accomplished simultanously with his upfield explosion. It was probably only about a 6, 7 yard run, but it was the kind of play that scares the shit out of defensive coordinators on tape and gets linebackers and defensive ends warned to prioritize the “outside contain,” which is why it would be fun to either throw Chester Taylor (when healthy) back there with Peterson or give the ball to Tony Richardson (when healthy) up the gut more often. The plays with my man (I may be his last staunch supporter, but I love the guy) Mewelde Moore and Peterson sharing a backfield were likewise very successful today.

    One last thing about Peterson; you hear all this stuff about how he runs too high, doesn’t get low enough. I’ll concede that this might increase his risk of injury, but otherwise, man, it’s part of his style, and everyone should leave him alone about it. A lot of fabulous backs ran high in their day, including Walter Payton, Christian Okoye and to a lesser extent Emmitt Smith. Besides, Peterson plays off that high style, in that he often lowers his shoulder and rises up to shrug off tacklers–that’s one of the reasons they bounce off him. Watching him, you can certainly understand why his collarbone is injury-prone, and people coming at him sidewise really can measure him for a monster hit. But like all great backs, so much of what he is doing is intuitive and can’t really be changed without sacrificing something good. Leave him alone and cross your fingers. And notice right now that it is Taylor and Richardson who are dinged, not AP.

    ** About the only thing that has really surprised me about the Vikes this season surprised me about them last year too, but I foolishly bought the hype again over the off-season: Their offensive line is way overrated. The right side was going to be shakey from the start, but the fabled left side, the expensive, star-studded trio of McKinnie-Hutchinson-Birk, simply aren’t as good as their reputations. Shaun Rogers had a whale of a day at the nose tackle over Birk, and Corey Redding likewise was often in the backfield. There were precious few gaping holes for Peterson and co. to run through, and precious few occasions when Jackson could drop back in the pocket and casually survey the field. Those three stud linemen, plus Peterson, pretty much comprise the Vikings’ only hope for offensive success this season, and the beef isn’t pulling their weight in the expectations game.

    **If you’re going to have a QB as inexperienced as Jackson, it certainly would be nice to have at least one quality receiver to help bail him out. Bobby Wade came to Minnesota with the stats of a journeyman and has demonstrated a journeyman’s skill set thus far. On a quality team he’d be your third receiver, at best, someone you threw in the slot on passing downs. Troy Williamson dropped two more passes today and is either physically or mentally incapable of overcoming this glaring flaw enough to gamble on his great speed. Sidney Rice looked good in the preseason, and made a good block on the screen pass versus Atlanta that helped spring Peterson for six. Don’t know if Rice was injured or if Childress just decided to ride Robert Ferguson, but if this is indeed a rebuilding year (and only the most deluded fan would conclude otherwise), why not let Jackson and Rice get to know each other under game conditions as often as possible? Ferguson is obviously on the back end of his career. In any event, Wade-Williamson-Ferguson isn’t going to stretch the field or otherwise scare anybody, especially with Jackson under center.

    **It really is a shame that the line of scrimmage in a football game is one of the toughest places to really spotlight and appreciate a great defender. A good case can be made that Kevin Williams and Pat Williams are the best interior line tandem in the NFL right now, and when Kevin Williams breaks through and forces a fumble, as happened today, it reinforces the point. But most of the time teams don’t even bother to run at the Williams boys–the Lions certainly didn’t much today, and if the Falcons had anyone other than Joey Harrington they probably wouldn’t have either–and when they do, it is just a rugby-like scrum most of the time. Kevin Williams is a better Keith Millard, and that’s saying something because Millard, while being a crazy, ‘roided MF, had some fabulous games in the pit. But the Vikes have never had a run-stuffer as good as Pat Williams was last season. Teams that live and die by the run, like the Bears, are going to be the most enjoyable opponents for the Vikings this season; although Chicago will probably even turn Rex Grossman loose against this pass defense.

    **Which brings us to Cedric Griffin. I don’t know the coverages, so I don’t know if the Lions were picking on Griffin as much as it seemed today. But you certainly didn’t see them completing much on Antonio Winfield. Griffin was one of my favorite players last year because he was upbeat and played with a no-nonsense attitude. But you can’t teach height, and one of the few smart observations by today’s commentators made the point about the physical disparity between Griffin and Lions receiver Roy Williams, not to mention the huge rookie Calvin Johnson. The Vikings’ third round pick out of Fresno didn’t have a great day either; ditto the linebackers in pass pro. Put it this way: The Vikes haven’t come close to facing a quality quarterback yet, and already their secondary has been exposed. Hats off to Darren Sharper for two picks and heady forced fumble, and, to be fair, the defense has played well enough to be competitive both weeks thus far. But with the lack of offensive firepower, that back seven can’t be as inconsistent as they’ve shown.

    **Will we be looking at Kelly Holcomb before too long? Of all three signal-callers on the roster, he’s the one with the most experience and the best credentials. Is Childress really prepared to go with Jackson through thick and thin? If so, tickets at the Dome are going to be fairly easy to come by around Thanksgiving.

  • The Week in Eating

    Monday, September 17, the Campus Club at the University of Minnesota will host Jazz88 FM’s monthly RestauranTour benefit dinner. It’s a winning combination – a talented chef, Mary Cashman (formerly of the No Wake Cafe), an interesting menu: heirloom tomato salad, fig-stuffed chicken roulade, and apple galette with thyme whipped cream, a reasonable price ($50 per person, including accompanying wines), and a worthy cause: public radio. And since KBEM-FM is a jazz radio station, there will be piano accompaniment by jazz pianist Alissa Wendelshafer of the U of M school of music.
    I attended the last Jazz 88 Restaurant Tour, a Peruvian dinner prepared by chef Rachel Rubin at the LeDuc mansion in Hastings, and had a terrific time. For reservations or more information, contact Kevin Barnes at, or visit the KBEM website and click on Restaurantour.

    Why didn’t we think of that? The Sample Circuit organizes Happy Hour expeditions to a different restaurant every week. You get to nibble and nosh your way through a sampling of the restaurant’s menu offerings, and taste some featured wines and spirits, all for $38. This Tuesday, September 18, they’ll visit Azia, the Asian fusion restaurant on Eat Street. To sign up, go to the Sample Circuit website.

  • Dylan Messaging

    This is one of the coolest things I’ve seen in a long time… and so simple, too. (Granted, you had to have seen the message I was sent to fully appreciate my enthusiasm.) Send your friends a message, “Subterranean Homesick Blues”-style.

  • Don't Hold Your Breath for the Avista Foundation

    There was a brief flurry of activity yesterday as a rumor blew around town that Ramsey County Judge David Higgs was ready to announce his decision in what we here at Slaughter Central like to refer to as Le Affair Par. It proved a false alarm.

    But the mere thought of another round of Par Ridder/Avista follies, (and it is not beyond the realm of possibility that Higgs will dismiss Dean Singleton’s complaint as much ado about nothing), reminded me of a point worth reiterating in the matter of the closing of the Star Tribune Foundation.

    As I reported last month, despite a recent letter to subscribers touting the on-going philanthropy of the Star Tribune Foundation, the Star Tribune Foundation no longer exists and the current Avista Capital Partners-owned Star Tribune has no foundation of its own and as far as any fund-raiser in town is aware Avista Capital Partners aren’t donating so much as a dull nickel to Twin Cities’ community and arts organizations. Zero.

    Looking for a perspective on this sudden evaporation of contributions from a company that used to play a significant role in enhancing the vitality of life here in the Twin Cities — as opposed to simply sucking as much cash as possible out of it — I called around to people well aware of the now defunct Star Tribune Foundation’s role.

    First was Colin Hamilton, executive director of The Friends of the Minneapolis Public Library. Hamilton emphasized that the Star Tribune Foundation was a small-ish player in comparison to something like the McKnight Foundation, making modest four-digit contributions routinely for years. But the Foundation stepped up big time when the library launched its capital campaign for the new building, donating $500,000, and just as importantly, donating first and thereby setting a precedent for other major contributors. (Cargill was another early donor.)

    “First gifts are always very significant,” said Hamilton. “Often times you are not credible to other potential donors until someone else has demonstrated their confidence in you, which the Star Tribune Foundation did. We were extraordinarily grateful. Sam[antha] Fleitman has always been a very good friend to the library.”

    Fleitman’s job managing the Star Tribune Foundation was axed as the McClatchy Corporation shut down operations here, took whatever was left in the Foundation accounts with them back to California and the new owners Avista, uh, DECLINED to establish a Foundation of its own. Fleitman now works for Andersen Windows’ foundation.

    Among Twin Cities non-profit fund-raisers Andy Currie qualifies as something of a dean. He has personally been in the fund-raising game for 40 years, the last 32 in the Twin Cities. His recent work includes capital campaigns for Regions Hospital, Sister Kenny, the Minneapolis Planetarium and the Tubman Family Alliance.

    I asked if he was aware of any kind of charitable funding coming out of the Avista-owned Star Tribune?

    “I’m not aware,” he said, “of anything charitable being done right now at the Star Tribune. I certainly have not heard of anything. They seem to be having enough other problems, but I don’t know what’s going on there.”

    The issue obviously is one of basic community quid pro quo. The guy running the corner sandwich shop knows enough to give a little get a little goodwill and customer favor. Unfortunately that game breaks down pretty fast when the company’s owners leave town — or in Avista’s case — never even bother to move here. No one expects Exxon/Mobil to dole out money to the Minneapolis Library or The Jungle Theater, although God knows they could. But a monopoly local daily newspaper, pitching itself as “The Newspaper of the Twin Cities” is playing a much different game, especially at a time when it is trying to sell “right-sizing” as a facet of a “hyper-local” or “local, local” uber-commitment to every neighborhood and suburb in the area.

    In my mind a “hyper-local” editorial strategy gains credibility when it is accompanied by a return investment in the institutions that vitalize and sustain the neighborhoods a newspaper claims to be so earnestly committed to covering.

    But I live here. Avista doesn’t. Although I have to assume that after tallying up their return-on-investment from all of their various businesses Avista Capital Partners, or Avista Capital Holding LP, should have at least $3 million a year left to sprinkle around/re-invest in Minnesota. You’d think they’d be hip to doing it if only as a gesture of goodwill and ingratiation by a faceless company that more Minnesotans every day regard as just another dispassionate siphoning operation, depleting us for the greater good of a few hedge fund types far, far away.

    And if Avista’s argument is that they don’t have $3 million, I’m thinking that mortgage meltdown has crept higher than I ever imagined.

    Obviously, GIVING MONEY BACK to one of the dozens of communities where it has investment interests is not even on the Avista radar. The sole point is to extract money.

    Andy Currie notes that under ownership by the Cowles family, the Star Tribune was a founding member of The Keystone Club, the group of corporations who committed to the 5% of profits rule for local contributions, a standard that was the envy of other large metropolitan areas and contributed significantly to the Twin Cities much-touted quality of life.

    “More community-minded people you could not find,” says Currie of the Cowles. “They were heroes to me.”

    Currie also reminded me that that hefty library check withstanding, the Star Tribune Foundation normally eschewed gifts to capital campaigns, preferring instead to underwrite individual productions at Jeune Leune and The Jungle and other arts venues.

    “When Honeywell was sold to that company in, where is it? New Jersey?” he said, “that knocked $11 to $15 million out of the local contribution market. And now the Star Tribune. You’re talking a pretty serious impact.”

    Over at The Jungle, executive director, Margo Gisselman, explained the cruel irony that, “It takes a while to qualify for funding from the Star Tribune Foundation, and after years we had finally gotten in. They gave us $5000, and now it’s gone. It is such a bummer to us.” Individually, she says, the Cowles family continues to support The Jungle.

    Avista? Not so much. “No, they are not donors.”

    Currie says Best Buy, Minnesota’s 21st century empire, “is gaining momentum as a corporate contributor”. He commends the Hubbard family (of KSTP-TV and radio) for being “very generous” to various causes, notes that KARE-TV occasionally provides grants through parent company, Gannett, Inc., that other stations, like WCCO-TV are good about donating anchor time for charitable events. But that Clear Channel, which owns seven radio stations in the Twin Cities and over 1200 nationwide, “is not on any [contributor] lists that I look at.”

    Clear Channel’s various stations do do heavily-branded events with percentages going to various causes. But Texas-based Clear Channel, with over $5 billion in net media revenue in 2006 (according to Ad Age), is not making any great philanthropic effort in Minnesota.

    The old joke of course is that Clear Channel is the operational model for media investors like Avista.

  • Prince Wants to Sue YouTube

    Hollywood Rag gives us the scoop on Prince’s bid to “reclaim his art on the internet.”

  • The True Story of Larry Craig

    With a little help from R&B crooner R. Kelly, Jon Stewart tells us why Larry Craig is Trapped in the Closet.

  • Soundtrack For the Ultimate Roadtrip

    Fifty songs for fifty states.

    Not bad, but I’m sure we could swap out better choices for at least half of these.