Bloom of fireworks above a black field, the idle of insects throbbing from the damp ditches. Distant petroleum carnival of light, dark steeples, and a watertower announcing the presence of a town. Is that the rattle of a snare drum from somewhere out in the fields? Tell me again what lives in that place beyond … Read more
If you go beyond the Twins’ so-so 8-11 record in Florida and scrutinize what they’ve actually done in those games, you might be tempted to forecast a rather alarming repeat of what made the team so maddening for much of the 2004 season. Look at the runs scored and runs allowed numbers for the AL … Read more
Here is a true-life fairy tale for all embattled and embittered freelance writers everywhere—and we can say with some satisfaction that we know this fable by heart. But let’s run through the paces anyway, and we may arrive at a new and surprising moral to the story. A solid mid-masthead writer at a New York … Read more
We’ve been on vacation in Florida this week and for us news junkies it’s been a pleasure to partake of the St. Petersburg Times, and ignore the usual suspects. In consequence, we’ve been able to read the local, rather than national, coverage of the Terri Schiavo case, and get the perspective of the people who … Read more
I’m not talking about that old world, mister. I’m trying to forget I ever lived there. All those bastards had ants in their pants, and you’d think it wouldn’t be possible to cram that many drunken jackasses in a Volvo, but you’d be sadly mistaken. I saw it all with my own eyes. Oh, Lord, … Read more
Surprises and disasters large and small could still be looming in the final week of spring training, but right now it looks like the Twins opening day line-up will look like this: Shannon Stewart Jason Bartlett Joe Mauer Justin Morneau Torii Hunter Lew Ford Jacque Jones Michael Cuddyer Luis Rivas With Ford, Jones, and Cuddyer … Read more
We hate being the center of the national news when it means yet another school shooting. And we hate having to write this: What possible service can this news be to the Plain People of America? It most certainly is news, even though we detect a certain low-level anomie—even a perverse detachment developing, as each … Read more
Gogol’s last words: ‘A ladder, quick, a ladder!’ —Elias Canetti, The Agony of Flies I’ve never been able to sleep like a normal person, and I literally could count the number of dreams I remember in my lifetime on one hand. This last week, however, I’ve been trying a new medication, and experiencing the sort … Read more
We are pleased to report yet another first here at the magazine: Last night, we finally took a nap on that old seat-sprung couch over there. (Photographic evidence to the contrary was carefully staged.) This morning, there are lots of reasons why we might want to just close our eyes and make the world go … Read more
I never stop talking, even when I’m just muddling around the house by myself (which is, to be perfectly honest for a change, most of the time). I’m always spitting out words and pushing them around, hoping to carve a new language out of all the silence and empty space, or at least build something … Read more