Category: Sports

  • Ain't That Pretty At All: Fun With Numbers

    You pretty much have to trot out ever dis– word in your arsenal to describe the nightmares of the first five weeks of the 2006 Twins season: Discouraging. Dismal. Disheartening. Disgusting. Disgraceful. Disappointing. Discomfiting. Discombobulated. Distressing. Disastrous, E…T…C….

    A team can be some of those things and still manage to be entertaining, but thus far this hasn’t, alas, been one of those teams. I guess there was that thrilling little blip in the early going (the series with Oakland, New York, and LA), but from this vantage that stretch now looks like just a blurry and miserable tease.

    If you’re a glutton for punishment or just literally have nothing better to do with your time, you can comb through the numbers all you want, but I can assure you that outside of the performances of Luis Castillo (and please explain to me how a guy can replace Luis Rivas and be even better than advertised and still make absolutely no difference) and a few other guys (who also have made absolutely no difference) you won’t find much in the way of encouragement.

    Unless, of course, you find this sort of thing encouraging:

    The Twins have now scored three or fewer runs sixteen times.

    They have been shut-out four times, and scored just one run in three games.

    Opposing teams have more doubles (65) than the Twins have extra base hits (62).

    Minnesota has been out-homered 38-22.

    The team leader in victories (with three wins) has a 7.29 earned run average.

    The team on base percentage is .307, which just happens to be Luis Rivas’s career OBP.

    Opponents have compiled an .860 on base-plus-slugging percentage against Minnesota pitching. The Twins’ team leader, Castillo, has an OPS of .858.

    Should I expect
    the clouds to lift anytime soon?

    I should not.

    Yet I will, nonetheless, expect the clouds to lift, because I am a dog, and I cannot live without hope.

  • How'd Ya Like Them Apples?

    This piece of information doesn’t exactly qualify as comfort, but on a rainy Saturday in late April it will perhaps serve as a grim and modestly entertaining diversion: For two days, late in the first month of the 2006 season, the Minnesota Twins were the worst baseball team on the planet.

    And maybe this will make you feel as optimistic as it does me: Albert Pujols is the same age as Jason Bartlett.

  • Hacking, Ineffectually

    Here’s the frustrating and telling thing about last night’s half-assed performance in Kansas City: Sure, the Twins scored just one run off Runelvys Hernandez, but it’s what they did –or didn’t do– when they weren’t scoring that one run that was so pathetic.

    Hernandez was making his first 2006 start, this after going 8-14 with a 5.52 ERA last season, a year in which he walked almost as many batters (70) as he struck out (88). He also gave up 172 hits in 159 and-two-thirds innings –172 hits and 70 walks. You do the math.

    Yet the Twins managed two lousy hits off Hernandez in seven innings, and didn’t draw a walk all night. They struck out three times (twice against relievers).

    What does that mean?

    It means they don’t seem to have any freaking idea what they’re doing. It means they’re going up there and getting cheated or guessing wrong against a garbage-spitter like Runelvys Hernandez. It means they’re swinging the bats and making outs, lots and lots of outs.

    It means they’re clueless, and it means –even if the pitching gets straightened out, or when it gets straightened out (Lohse and Baker were both just fine)– they’re in trouble.

    But I’m a positive thinker, dammit, or at least I’m still willing to nurse my delusions. So I’m going to say that maybe the recent offensive embarrassments just mean that the Twins need to get April in their rearview mirror.

  • Big Noise In Kansas City

    Sure, the Twins scored two runs against a lousy Royals team, but look on the bright side: Last year they would have given up three.

    Good news: The Twins are now 4-1 in one-run games.

    Bad news: They’ve now scored three or fewer runs ten times, and are 1-9 in those games.

    There, I’ve posted. Now get off my back; the 800-pound gorilla’s starting to feel a little bit crowded.

  • This Is Not Deja Vu All Over Again

    I was walking around New York this past weekend and I kept seeing cabs with these snazzy ESPN sports tickers scrolling across their roofs. I saw the Twins-White Sox score on one of the things late Friday night, and then saw what I thought was the same score Saturday night. I just assumed the information didn’t get updated very often. I had no idea until I got back here this morning that the Twins essentially played the same shitty game three days in a row.

    I refuse to believe this is ‘here we go again’ until it’s so obviously ‘here we go again’ that I can no longer deny that it is, in fact, ‘here we go again.’

    Or something like that.

    In the meantime, I’ll have nothing further to say until this team atones for its sins by winning another series.

    Or at least another game.

  • What Makes A Manager Good?

    I don’t know if there’s a manager in the Major Leagues that gets a blanket pass from his team’s fans.

    Maybe, you’d think, Joe Torre would, but anybody who’s ever spent any time in New York listening to sports talk radio (don’t ask) knows that every move Torre makes –and doesn’t make– is as scrutinized and subject to fanatic screeds as the decisions Ron Gardenhire makes here in Minnesota.

    I’ve thought about it for years, and I still can’t make up my mind about what sorts of qualities, characteristics, and personality traits I’d want were I hiring a manager for my imaginary baseball team.

    There have been plenty of instances where obvious boneheads have managed excellent teams, and even managed clubs that won world championships (Bob Brenley being the example that comes immediately to mind).

    Once upon a time –not all that long ago, really– I used to be able to rattle off the names of every manager in the Major Leagues. Right off the top of my head, no problem. A lot of those once-upon-a-time managers were as famous as the players on their teams, and recognized primarily for their fiery and colorful personalities and combativeness with umpires. I’m thinking of guys like Leo Durocher, Earl Weaver, Billy Martin, Dick Williams, and Tommy Lasorda. Or old warriors like Gene Mauch.

    I still haven’t made up my mind whether any of those guys were great managers or not. Among that group there were certainly a lot of different philosophies, many of them tailored to the sorts of teams they managed. Looking over their career records makes it hard to draw any definite conclusions, other than that when they had good players to trot out there every night they tended to win.

    I think the same thing is probably just as true today, but I also suppose it’s possible that a truly lousy manager (Butch Hobson, for instance) can actually sabotage a decent team’s chances to win.

    I also know that today there an awful lot of pretty anonymous characters out there wearing manager’s uniforms in Major League dugouts.

    What really are the fundamental qualities of a good manager?

    One of them, I’d think, would be the ability to recognize talent in his organization and to make the best use of the talent he does have. That seems pretty obvious, but it’s always surprising to me how many guys who get these jobs fail even that most basic of tests.

    With all the money in today’s game, and the big egos that come with it, more and more it seems like the job really does boil down to the job title –an awful lot of time and attention has to be paid to managing disparate personalities in the clubhouse and on the field. People always talk about leadership and chemistry with regard to big league clubhouses, and it’s struck me in recent years that with almost every team those intangibles flow first and foremost from the manager’s office.

    Other than personnel decisions, it’s a manager’s strategic approach –or lack thereof– that leads to the most debate among fans: making out the batting order, calling for sacrifice bunts or hit-and-run plays, stealing bases, and the handling of the pitching staff. All of these decisions are a constant source of debate, and tend to look brilliant when they work out and counter-productive when they don’t.

    The bottom line, of course, is the bottom line: Whether a team wins or loses. When there seems to be a consistent pattern to the way a club wins or loses I suppose you can draw some conclusions about how much of the credit for that goes to the manager and how much to the players.

    I watch a lot of baseball games, though, and have watched a lot of baseball games over the last several decades, and I pretty routinely see managers –even supposedly good managers– make decisions that have me scratching my head.

    So, you tell me: what is that makes a manager good? Who are the great ones in the Major Leagues today, and why? What do you have against Ron Gardenhire, or what might you say in his favor? And, finally, if you ran the zoo and could pick anyone, who would you hire to manage the Twins?

    I’m headed to New York for a few days, and, weather permitting, might take in a Yankee game.

    Before I go, though, I’d also like to discuss what the hell seems to be wrong with Jesse Crain. I did think it was strange when his strikeout rates –which were always pretty impressive in the minor leagues– declined so drastically last year, even as he was inarguably effective.

    I’ll tell you one think I noticed the last couple years that seems to be missing from his approach so far this season: Last year in particular he was one Minnesota pitcher who was never afraid of pitching inside, and his above-average fastball was a great weapon for keeping opposing hitters from crowding the plate. I remember remarking that I couldn’t remember the last Twin pitcher who brushed back so many batters, usually early in the count.

    I haven’t seen much, if any, of that so far in 2006, and Crain looks to me like he’s consistently finding too much of the plate with his pitches. I think it might be time for him to get back in touch with his inner Don Drysdale.

  • Couldn't Have Happened To A Nicer Guy

    That bottom of the tenth inning had to be one of great examples of karmic retribution in the history of professional baseball, and it sure as hell had to be exactly the sort of scenario Ron Gardenhire started dreaming about the moment he heard the news that J.C. Romero was no longer a Minnesota Twin.

    And wherever this odyssey leads, and whatever else this team serves up in the way of entertainment and disappointment, it’s going to be mighty hard for the Twins to deliver a stretch of highs and lows to rival the first two weeks of the season. In five days they’ve already played two of the best games –and staged two of the greatest comebacks– in recent memory.

    Honest to God, Saturday’s 6-5 win over the Yankees and tonight’s game of Rock Em Sock Em Robots againsts the Angels were spectacular examples of why baseball is the greatest game ever invented, and why anybody who bails on a game in the middle innings deserves to be banished from the ballpark forever.

    We can save the discussion of just how the hell Kyle Lohse manages to hoodwink Major League arbitrators year in and year out for another day. For now, though, let’s just try to be grateful that J.C. Romero is wearing an Angels uniform, and that Mike Scioscia was fool enough to send him out to the mound in the tenth inning of a tie game.

  • It's Early, But It's Getting Ugly In A Hurry For Rondell

    Maybe Rondell White is going to snap out of his slump in spectacular fashion any day now and reward the confidence Ron Gardenhire has shown in him by writing his name in the clean-up spot night after night.

    This is a guy, after all, with a career .289 batting average, who’s never hit lower than .270 in a season. In his abbreviated season last year with Detroit, White hit .313 in 374 at bats.

    Maybe he really has been discombobulated by the designated hitter role, even though he’s done a bit of DH duty over the last few years and knew coming into the season that that was going to be his primary responsibility with the Twins.

    Still, holy shit, White’s 2006 start has been absolutely brutal on so many levels, and truly painful to watch. It’s been even worse, of course, precisely because he has been the DH, and isn’t contributing in any other way.

    The numbers are really something to behold: Four hits in 47 at bats. One extra base hit (a double). Sixteen strikouts and zero walks. An .085 batting average, and .100 on base percentage.

    And, sorry, but you can’t avoid this number, either: $2,500,000.

    I know that 47 at bats aren’t a fair barometer, but they sure seem to be enough to have messed with Rondell’s head in a big way. What do you think the chances are at this point that White will end up making a significant contribution to this team? And can the Twins still have a competitive season if they get nothing from him?

  • The Return Of The Good News-Bad News Bears

    So, okay, after a woeful start on the road the Twins have come home and swept Oakland and shutdown a New York club that has been alleged by some to be one of the greatest offensive teams ever assembled.

    That’s been impressive. And that’s been entertaining. The Twins have won two one-run games, battled back in four straight, and have been consistently driving in runs with two outs (three two-out RBIs in last night’s win over the Yankees). Tony Batista has a .364 on base percentage. Torii Hunter has eleven RBI and ten runs in ten games.

    The bullpen’s also been mostly outstanding, and the defense has been terrific.

    For the time being, at least, the decision to keep Juan Castro over Jason Bartlett looks like pure genius.

    The most amazing thing about this blip of inspired baseball, however, is that Minnesota has managed to claw its way back to .500 without a single win from Johan Santana or any contribution whatsoever from key offseason acquisition and clean-up hitter Rondell White. The team leader in strikeouts is a 22-year-old middle reliever who hasn’t even logged seven full innings yet.

    This is a team, of course, that never quite managed to run on all cylinders last year, and I suppose you have to figure that just when guys like Santana and White start heating up, there’ll be a couple of guys whose production will start falling off. Still, it is sort of comforting that the players we’re still waiting to get going weren’t exactly huge question marks coming into the season.

    I still believe this is going to be a pretty good team, and like to think that its performance in the last four games is much more in line with my expectations than the squad that stumbled so badly out of the starting gate.

    I also still wish like hell Jim Thome wasn’t wearing a Chicago White Sox uniform.

    And, finally, I cannot begin to understand why any National League team would sign Matthew LeCroy. I wish somebody out there would try to explain that to me.

  • Tings And Times: A Few Random Observations From The Home Opener

    This seems modestly interesting to me:

    Last night’s starting lineup included five players (Castillo, White, Morneau, Batista, and Castro) that were not in the lineup for last year’s home opener against Chicago. The 2004 lineup on opening day had six guys who are no longer even with the team (Rivas, Mientkiewicz, Koskie, Jones, LeCroy, and Guzman).

    In 2003 that number was seven, in 2002 it was eight (with Torii Hunter the lone carryover), and all nine of the 2001 opening day starters are no longer with the team.

    Patrick Reusse’s column today
    pretty much nails the feeling in the clubhouse and around the batting cage. So far, at any rate, this is the quietest Twins team in years.

    Still, it was a good ballgame, and demonstrated the sort of team this version of the Twins could be, or at least the sort of ball it needs to play to succeed: A hitting and baserunning clinic from Joe Mauer (who really does have a chance to be even better than advertised, which is, of course, saying something), stellar defense (most notably from new second baseman Luis Castillo), a shaky, then solid, workmanlike start from veteran inning-eater Brad Radke, and power when it came in most handy.

    That last business is certainly the thing that’s been missing the last couple years, and the thing you’d most like to be able to depend on from the Twins this season. As Earl Weaver always understood, a three-run homer can work wonders for a baseball team, particularly a baseball team trying to dig its way out of a 4-0 hole.

    I also thought this bit of information from the Twins media relations folks was interesting: Who do you think has thrown out the first pitch on opening day more times than any other person?

    Think hard, and I’ll give you a little hint: Nobody else is even close.

    I’ll also tell you that Rudy Perpich threw out the first pitch of the season three times. Rod Carew and Harmon Killebrew have each done it twice, as has Clem Haskins. Hal Greenwood shared the duties in 1973.

    Give up?

    Former Governor Wendell Anderson tossed out the first pitch for six straight seasons, from 1971 through 1976.

    Finally, I didn’t even notice: Did they trot out Lee Greenwood for the seventh-inning stretch last night?