God bless our man Chuck Haga, who like a friendly health teacher with a high beltline, a stylish combover, and a full quiver of PG-13 puns, has compiled a little refresher list of euphemisms for marijuana. Strib readers who receive their copies of the paper at their guard stations can thus be dutifully outraged today by the “dopers” who are “sucking up” street signs in rural Minnesota. (420th Street–get it? “High Street” has been a target for decades, of course, but the Strib is just getting up to speed here, so bear with ’em.)
A couple quick observations on this. First, where is the Strib article decrying the well armed militia of gun-nuts out there who insist on blasting every rural stop sign out of existence? Is the $80 cost of replacing street name signs somehow more onerous than the $80 cost of replacing all those ventilated stop signs? Or is it just more fun to single out the harmless hippies rather than the trigger-happy rednecks? (Extra credit: the Strib has “no guns allowed on these premises” notices on all of its buildings and entrances. Everyone knows that this is a covert, liberal statement of protest about Minnesota’s soft-headed new conceal and carry law. When the editors hear about this, how long will it take them to remove the signage as a natural consequence of their ongoing Red Shift?)
Second, why must local governments insist on naming every little dirt road through hell’s half acre as if this alone will make the dangerous outback safe for the McMansion developers?
Finally, if this is truly the epidemic it appears to be, how about not naming any rural roads “420”?
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