He’d be assassinated today, too.
I wasn’t sure whether I should laugh or cry yesterday when I heard that Michele Bachmann had “scolded” the God Hates Fags protesters at the funeral of the Minnesota soldier who had been killed in Iraq. As Bachmann explained, it’s not that God doesn’t hate fags, it’s just that he doesn’t hate them enough to desecrate a soldier’s funeral.
No, really. She just wants it put to a vote of the people of Minnesota as to whether or not God hates fags. Michele, do you really think the people of any state should get to vote on what God does or doesn’t hate? That’s what we have a legislature for, right? So, if you can just get your Senate colleagues to vote on what God hates or doesn’t hate, that will just have to do. Leave the people out of it, because, frankly, if we’ve learned anything about what people will vote for these days, it’s that they’ll vote for damn near anything that fills their little minds with hateful crap.
Michele, you should consider the possibility that appendicitis is only the first warning that an overload of vile prejudice can cause pain…maybe pain sent from, yes, God. Sent to punish you. Yeah, I know the mind of God, too. That’s it. You are in deep shit now.
I was sort of wondering as you were about to go under the knife, as the pain in your side gave way to the anasthesia, if a thought flashed through your mind: “God, please don’t let my surgeon be gay.”
The only thing that saved Michele from being the real highlight of my day, however, was the thought of George W. Bush spreading flower petals at the memorial to Mohandas Gandhi in India. You can’t make up stuff like that.
It gives me a huge pain to even mention those two men in the same sentence. God, please give me a tiny portion of the Mahatma’s capacity to forgive.
Never mind. Someday, Bush, when someone explains to you who Gandhi was (other than some guy in a Ben Kingsley movie) you’ll be ashamed.
Actually, you probably won’t.
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