Stephanie March What is it about cows and cowboys that make us wax rhapsodic? It seems they beget legend and lore, or at least they did in the days when the sight of a herd breaking over a hill, with unshaven, grizzly men on horseback driving them in, could bring a tear to any Pappy’s eye. Maybe … Read more
Don’t let the imposters win. You are encouraging their success when you order a rum and Coke and settle for Shasta. When you allow people to offer a cup of java, then serve up Folgers crystals. The worst offense is to say “pass the Parmesan” as you’re looking at a rotund shaker of a fluffy … Read more
During a lecture to a Harvard class, philosopher George Santayana happened to glance out the window and spot a burgeoning forsythia in a patch of snow. Heading to the door, he declared, “I shall not be able to finish that sentence. I have just discovered that I have an appointment with April.” She’s a sassy … Read more
Sitting at the Ideal Diner in the spring can be anything but. In this Northeast Minneapolis joint there is the counter and there is the cooking line, and that’s it. Perched on a prize stool, you are simultaneously warmed by the remarkable heat emanating from the grill and chilled by the rush of cold air … Read more
Casanova was a scoundrel. He was a scalawag, banned from Venice and disqualified from a career with the Church. He scammed rich and poor alike at every turn. And he was a lawyer. Yet, if he were to make a few appearances between now and November, he might get elected president. For despite all his … Read more
The Chinese calendar declares that 2004 is the year of the monkey. Anyone born this year will be intelligent, well-liked by everyone, and have success in any field they choose. Lucky monkeys. The loquacious and red-faced Democrats have claimed 2004 as the Year of Change. Athletes and festival purists may see 2004 as the year … Read more
Everyone has a Great Aunt Tootie they haul out for the holidays. She sits in the corner calling everyone by the wrong name and talking about the turkey she had back in ’29 that was really made out of dirt. Someone thought it was a great idea to bring her, but now nobody knows what … Read more
It’s a child’s privilege—and punishment—to help with the Thanksgiving turkey. The responsibility of assisting in the preparation of the main dish is heady, indeed. Turkey is pretty much the definition of Thanksgiving for many kids, and they may dream of the moment when that golden bird is brought out to the big table and all … Read more
I had my chili epiphany in a bar in Dallas. Unlike some of my other saloon-supplied revelations, this one came not from the bourbon but from the crusty old dude on the next stool. I’d just asked for advice on the best local rib joint. After about an hour of discourse with details including serious … Read more
Wheat is under attack. Not from nasty-toothed beetles or fungus-ridden blight. This attack is more sinister, more devastating, because it comes from those once whole-heartedly on wheat’s side. The traitors are none other than the very same nutritionists who used to harp on you to eat your whole-wheat toast. Wheat and all its lovely products … Read more