The other day, we were surprised to see a certain advertisement in Newsweek and the New Yorker. It was a bold yellow page that made a startling claim: Everything you’ve heard about mercury poisoning in fish is false. According to the ad, published by a mysterious organization identified only as FishScam.com, all the claims about … Read more
The sound of the well-made gun is precise. If you pull the slide back smoothly, the sound of the hammer locking back echoes with a sharp “clock” through the hollow grip. Slap a magazine into the grip, pull the slide back a little more and let it go. The sharp “smack” tells you a bullet … Read more
Collector: This is in regards to your MBNA account, sir. Debtor: OK. c: And on the MBNA account, I have a due balance of $8,841 and change. They will settle for eighty percent of the balance or a payment plan. d: Oh, OK. c: So how did you want to proceed in that? d: Um, … Read more
I have a vision of a place in northern Italy, a landscape of rolling, golden hills dotted with oak trees. As my mind’s eye zooms in on this scene, it becomes clear that something is hanging from the branches of the oaks. A sea breeze brushes past, and I realize that the boughs are laden … Read more
When you buy a farm, said the Roman agricultural writer Palladius, you need to look at the people who live in the area. If they seem a sturdy lot, you can invest with confidence, but if they are podgy and pasty faced (that is a free translation of the Latin), then keep away. The local … Read more
You probably didn’t notice, but due to a bureaucratic mix-up, there was no Shortlist Music Prize awarded this year. The “Shorty” was a newish but well-respected award that tried to recognize serious pop and rock bands for doing important new work, regardless of popularity. The main symptom of doing important work was selling less than … Read more
If you really want to get Minneapolitans edgy about crime, kill some white people. Since the random murders of two middle-class whites in Uptown and downtown, near Block E, both places where affluent people live, work, and spend big entertainment dollars, Minneapolis has dramatically raised its police profile at those locations. Block E, with its … Read more
It doesn’t take long to call the police. Sally is disappointed. She had hoped to be on hold for a while, listening to instrumental versions of Broadway tunes. She is poised to wait with her elbows and belly pressed against the counter, the phone pressed between her ear and shoulder, an earring scratching against the … Read more
When it comes to campers, there is the pack-only-what-you-need, leave-no-trace, love-your-mother variety, and there is the load-up-the-Explorer, don’t-forget-the-cappuccino-machine, outdoorsy-but-not-too-outdoorsy sort. There is also a third category, which fits between the two—motorcycle campers. More Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid than Lewis and Clarke, motorcycle campers pack light because they have to, but they ride because … Read more
This was the first interview I’d ever conducted with my shirt off. Standing before me in the mirrored pink closet was my subject: Lonnie Eiden, a nattily clad woman of supreme confidence, a professional bra fitter for forty years. “I think I’m a 34C,” I offered, playing right into her hands. “Let’s see what you’ve … Read more