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  • McWow

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    Maybe it’s because they’re just too McSkinny in Japan.
    Maybe it’s because they have a history of readily accepting improbable, huge monsters.
    Maybe it’s because they love restaurants with a toilet theme.

    Whatever it is, Japan is getting the Mega Mac.

    If that freaks you, wait until you find out what the hell Grimace actually is.

  • Back Door Lovin'

    Among those of us who experienced what might be called a “difficult” relationship with mainstream newspapering, one of the jokes about newspapers’ numbing institutional voice was that that voice must never, ever risk offending the kind of fine and decent ladies you find serving meatballs and lefse at a Lutheran church dinner. Such ladies were the acid test for hyper-cautious, risk-averse newspapering, for what flew and what didn’t. If you could imagine the meatball ladies being shocked, the story or phrasing got the “delete” button.

    Well, here’s a dark secret. The average second and third tier daily newspaper newsroom was/is full of incipient Lutheran meatball ladies (and men), people who have assigned themselves the task of rigorously assessing the naughtiness quotient of topics and wording. If you’re a reporter, good luck getting every day, garden variety, workplace-tested sexual vernacular past that crowd.

    So imagine my amazement, (and sophomoric amusement), when I leafed through the latest edition of Vita.Mn, the Star Tribune’s latest weekly vehicle for, like, rollin’ with the dudes. There was “Alexis on the Sexes”, the freebie’s sex columnist, dispensing sage counsel and I dare say, encouragement to couples interested in exploring the exotic delights of anal sex.

    Well … from my experience with daily newspapering, I can assure you that decent women and certainly no men in the newsroom would dare mention such a concept above a furtive whisper, the latter out of fear of a call from HR. (A bit of an exaggeration there. In certain “safe zones”, such topics were discussed, sometimes ad nauseam).

    Vita.Mn of course isn’t a mainstream daily, is it? But unlike the various free weeklies that have come and gone around town this one IS owned and operated and edited by the Star Tribune, where encouraging readers to try anal sex is about as remote a concept as suggesting some Hadassah lady set herself on fire on the Guthrie thrust stage.

    I called Tim Campbell, the droll fellow who edits Vita.Mn AND the Strib’s A&E section. I asked about the reaction to the column. “About what you’d expect,” he said. Not much from the public, really. The target audience of precocious teens, college kids, twenty-somethings and pervy geezers took it all in stride, and in fact, said Campbell, they respond far more to fashion stories than “Alexis on the Sexes”. (The presumption being, I guess, that all the aforementioned, with the exception of the pathetic pervy geezers, long ago included anal sex as a regular part of their sexual regimen and therefore are really far more concerned with accessory trends.)

    Campbell said the intra-newsroom chatter about the column was also fairly predictable, with the usual guardians of righteous propriety, (“a-choomeatball …”), expressing horror and declaring … again … the great and grand institution of the Star Tribune was poised, verily, on the precipice of a terrible slippery slope. If back door lovin’ was now appropriate conversation within their sacred, Big “J” journalistic halls, (and mine you, without a breath of moral condemnation!), why every facet of truth, fairness and accuracy, will soon be dragged into disrepute.

    As I say, attempts by mainstream newspapers to reach those much-coveted “younger readers” are often laughable. (I mean look at WHO is pretending to be hip!). Such attempts are doomed until Big “J” papers figure out a way to interact with that crowd on … the crowd’s terms … not the terms of the paper’s risk averse, (and often extraordinarily nerdy), meatball ladies/men-in-training. If that means a sex column, so be it. But don’t — and Campbell has not — then censor the sex columnist.

    Frankly, I suspect today’s kids have access to so much sexual information — and sexual bullshit — they hardly demand it from an actual paper newspaper. But, if you’re the big, lumbering corporate publisher trying to reach kids, talking sex comes with the territory, which means you’ve got to demonstrate a semblance of crede. As in tossing in a column on tips and tricks for back door lovin’ with an attitude of nonchalance.

    Somehow that led me to ask Campbell if Claude Peck and Rick Nelson’s
    very amusing, very gay Sunday “conversation” column, “Withering Glance”, might be a good fit for Vita.Mn? You know, maybe in an expanded, unfettered sort of form?

    Campbell thought a moment, conceded that when Peck and Nelson get into vivisecting fashion disasters Vita.Mn’s audience would probably connect, but then, on second thought, no. “I think they’re probably just too old.”

    Brutal. And just when you were thinking every gay guy was forever hip. Instead … Peck and Nelson consigned to a wing of the same musty floor as other geezers and meatball ladies, the hetero ones who woo-hooed and scowled at the mere mention of back door love.

  • Filling in the Blanks

    There’s nuthin’ much going on this evening, and I wouldn’t want to lead you astray. But check back tomorrow for more information about the free Herbach n’ Osterhout show.

  • Robert Drinan

    Robert Drinan was a Jesuit priest and law professor at Georgetown who served in Congress during the seventies and was the first member of Congress to call for the impeachment of Richard Nixon. He died today.

    He argued that Nixon should be impeached for the secret bombing of Cambodia, not for the secret break in to the Watergate offices of the Democratic Party.

    In 1998, he testified at the Clinton impeachment hearings and gave then judiciary chairman Henry Hyde both a law and a morality lesson. I couldn’t find the exact quotes on line, but I remember one exchange that went something like this: Drinan told Hyde that he would be judged, too, for what he did regarding impeachment. Hyde sensed Drinan wasn’t talking about politics and shot back, “Do you mean God will judge me.” Drinan said, pointing his finger, “That’s exactly what I mean.”

    A Jesuit priest and one of the country’s most respected constituional lawyers–Hyde was out of his depth.

  • Shiver

    Two things of note this cold, Monday evening: One, another discussion about the making of The Grapes of Wrath, this one moderated by Star Tribune book editor, Sally Williams; two, Matt Wilson’s Arts and Crafts (not to be confused with Minnesota’s very own M.W.–this is a different fella), which plays the Dakota.

  • Three Dozen

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    Today is my birthday.

    Looking back, the past year held various cooking victories: the ice cream follies of the summer (basil/lemon, chocolate/zinfandel, strawberry/balsamic, Guiness, sake/cucumber sorbet)…a few good looking loaves of ciabatta, and one really ugly but tasty boule … the perfect Stephanie pizza (pesto, prosciutto, arugula, and egg cracked on top) … a five layer cake that looked exactly like a giant Crabby Patty … oh there must be more.

    There have been some failures as well, like Thanksgiving dinner. I never told you about that? Huh.

    But tonight nobody has to cook, and everybody has been asking where I want to spend my birthday dinner.

    There are so many great options. I’d love a quiet evening at Restaurant Alma, so simply elegant. And if I hadn’t had sushi on Friday, I would be parked at BaGu Sushi, my new raw fish favorite. We could jazz it up and go to The Oceanaire, because three dozen oysters for three dozen years would seem quite appropriate to me. If it were just me, I’d snag a seat at the 112 Eatery bar and selfishly order for three.

    But it’s not just me. It is the six-pack that comprises my family and it is a Monday and it is freakin’ cold outside (as it always is). So it may not be fancy, or cutting edge, but we are heading to the LT tonight, where a worthy and luscious double California cheeseburger will grace my little paper plate. Topped off with softy fries and 1919 Rootbeer from the tap, this soul satisfying meal will happily kick-off the next 364.

  • Elif Shafak CANCELLED

    PLEASE NOTE: THIS EVENT CANCELLED.

    “If there is a thief in a novel,” said Elif Shafak recently, “it doesn’t make the novelist a thief.” Nevertheless, the Turkish novelist faced three years in prison for the purported crime of “insulting Turkishness” by having an Armenian character in her novel The Bastard of Istanbul refer to Turks as “butchers.” What’s more, Shafak was forced to watch her televised trial from the hospital bed where she had just given birth to her first child. Though she was acquitted, the case shed light on the culture clash within Turkish society. Shafak herself pointed to “those who want an open and democratic society” on one side, and, on the other, “those who speak the language of fear … [who are] so aggressive that they manage to manipulate the political agenda and give the country a black eye.” Sound familiar? 300 Nicollet Mall, Minneapolis; 612-630-6174; www.friendsofmpl.org

  • The End of the High Road

    Even casual strollers of downtown St. Paul will most likely notice the majestic High Bridge, just west of the business district. Towering above the other bridges of the city’s scenic Mississippi River valley and summiting at 160 feet above the Big Muddy, the High Bridge carries Smith Avenue from the bustling West Seventh Street commercial strip to … where, exactly?
    Even for many St. Paul natives, this can be a tough question. To the naked eye, Smith Avenue crosses the river to the high bluffs on the city’s West Side, and seems to disappear up a steep hill into a leafy residential area known as Cherokee Park. But if you follow the Avenue to the top of that incline, you reach Annapolis Street eleven blocks later, the dividing line between St. Paul and the suburb of West St. Paul. While some West Side merchants hope Smith will become the next Grand Avenue, plenty of locals hope that it doesn’t. Unlike its bigger-scale cousin, which has been colonized by chain stores, Smith Avenue still boasts that rare hip-yet-unpretentious vibe. This is still essentially a working-class neighborhood full of pre-war, single-family homes with modest yards, so pick-up trucks outnumber SUVs on the streets, and neckties are few and far between. Here, the West Side’s large Latino population mingles easily with the hipsters and elderly white folk who live nearby.
    The Annapolis intersection is anchored by several retail businesses. Thanks to two of them—the Old Man River Cafe and Caspers’ Cherokee Sirloin Room—it’s possible to walk down Smith and smell roasting coffee and sizzling steaks all at once. The coffee shop, owned by a pair of former journalists, occupies an old brick building that for seventy years was a pharmacy. Today, it serves not only as an outlet for its own line of java, but as a hub for the neighborhood’s social and political life, attracting a cross-section of local residents, Smith Avenue commuters, and West Side political junkies and activists.
    Across the street at the Sirloin Room—an excellent example of a family-owned institution that stuck around long enough to circle back into relevance—a dark, woody bar captures that feel of the comfy neighborhood joint, but with a hint of edge, especially on weekends. The place has been there since 1970, longer if you count the twenty-some years it was the Cherokee Tavern, before the Casper family bought it.
    West St. Paul Antiques is the corner’s cultural attraction. While it has a fine collection of antiques for purchase, it’s also fascinating as a museum. In its basement is perhaps the most overwhelming collection of St. Paul Winter Carnival memorabilia ever assembled in one place. Where else could you find the marching band uniforms of the Northern Pacific Railroad’s 1948 Torchlight Parade Drill Team?
    Farther down Smith toward Dodd Road, a few more small shops build on the arts-and-crafts theme of the corner. The Lisan Gallery of Art and Design shows mostly local artists such as June Young and Jodi Hills but is also providing a venue for artists from the Bay St. Louis, Mississippi, scene that was devastated by Hurricane Katrina. Next door at Fine Restorations, woodworking artisan Vanya Hoeffding does complicated repair jobs on treasured antique furniture while Classic Upholstery handles the more rank-and-file cases. Throw in a pair of picture framing shops, and you have a reminder of what it was to walk Grand Avenue in the 1970s.

  • Meaningful Minimalism

    I’m wearing yellow in honor of Jupiter,” declared design-cum-business maven Stephanie Odegard. The Minneapolis native was in her twelfth-floor studio in the New York Design Center, cosseted in a modest office near two large showrooms that feature her acclaimed carpets and furniture. Odegard Inc. has six sales offices in the United States, operations in Nepal, and twelve thousand employees worldwide. She pays her workers a living wage, sponsors schools, and is one of the forces behind Rugmark, a program that certifies carpets made without child labor. But the strong impression one gets of Odegard is not of a capitalist titan but of a metaphysical seeker. Odegard’s company earns more than a million dollars a month, yet she takes the time to don a yellow scarf in observance of Jupiter’s Day, which, according to ancient astrological tradition, is Thursday.
    Although Odegard “craves color,” she describes herself as a design minimalist. Her carpets are quiet seas of aquamarine, cerulean, tanzanite, and scarlet, sometimes with dashes of black at the borders. When she does include patterns, they are often subtle, just shades different than the background hues. Her home is a 1,200-square-foot Soho loft that she strives to keep empty. “You have this impulse to say ‘Here’s an empty space, I should put in a chair.’ It’s easy to fall into that, but I don’t want a house that’s filled. I can’t stand kitsch,” Odegard said, with a shudder and wave of the hand. “I live in fear of people giving me little presents. I don’t like lots of small things.”
    Yet her office, where she spends most of her waking hours, is filled with small things. This is where a secondary aesthetic comes into play: object as memento. There are many gifts on the shelves, including a miniature collection of brown clay houses and temples arranged like a Nepalese Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. On a lower shelf sits a set of four white ceramic cups from India, each painted with abstract, blue flowers. There are also ceramic, glass, and silver vases as well as many awards and a few framed photos of Odegard with the Dalai Lama.
    Odegard came to design for unusual and idealistic reasons. She longed to see the world and make it better. In interviews, she often speaks not of design but of the need for people to be well nourished and educated. She travels the globe trying to accomplish these missions, creating jobs and buying materials. The gifts and oddities she’s collected—the spinning toy tops kept in a vase, the metal inlaid mirror of the Hindu elephant-headed god, Lord Ganesh—represent alliances, friendships, and business well conducted. Having them around creates an atmosphere of positivity. By her own account, Odegard travels so lightly that she often runs out of clothes, but you get the distinct feeling she would dutifully lug home a bag of bricks if they were given to her by someone she liked or attached to a meaningful event. Suddenly the paradox of the minimalist with an office full of things makes sense. To seek objects is noisome; but to reject what arrives is to court bad karma.

  • Go Down Moses

    A recent intercepted email exchange between Monica Moses, executive director of product innovation at the Star Tribune, and Steve Perry, editor of City Pages, provided both a good laugh and good fodder for online discussion of “What the hell are newspapers and why are they seemingly dying?” 

    The exchange (posted on The Rake’s media blog) was precipitated by City Pages’ extensive coverage in January of the fire sale of the Strib by its parent company, McClatchy. In particular, Perry laid blame for the Strib’s recent circulation declines squarely at the feet of Moses, who had been the prime mover behind last year’s “redesign” of the Minneapolis daily. To summarize the emails, Moses thought Perry was full of crap, and vice versa.

    Reading between the lines of the emails, though, it was possible to see much more than an internecine spat between journalists. (Of course, extending the title “journalist” to Moses would be a stretch, even though her title during the redesign was “deputy managing editor for visuals.”) What became clear was the vast chasm that has grown between today’s corporate-newspaper person and an old-styler like Perry, who operates under the quaint notion that newspapers are something other than a means to deliver demographics to advertisers.

    If you need further evidence of the abyss, have a look at the statement McClatchy CEO Gary Pruitt made to the Wall Street Journal at the time of the Strib’s redesign in 2005: “The Star Tribune … is about to take the wraps off a redesign that we hope will make it a model for a Twenty-first Century newspaper.” That’s exactly the worldview Moses was defending: A modern “model newspaper” is defined by its design rather than its actual content. And as soon as the reporters who grew up on Watergate realize that, nowadays, their job duty is to “attract eyeballs” rather than “report stories,” they’ll be much happier. That the “model newspaper” is now worth about half of what McClatchy paid for it in 1998 should help to drive the point home, too.

    To be fair, though, the paper’s pretty visual presentation, which takes up so much space that used to go to words, is perhaps a logical response to the falling circulation numbers at newspapers nationwide. If you want a newspaper to be more attractive to more people, make it more like the things they are attracted to: the pretty visuals and superficial content of TV and the Internet. (The smart youth-oriented television show Veronica Mars sent up this attitude perfectly a couple of weeks ago. When teen detective Veronica was shown a controversial newspaper story accompanied by slick visuals, her comment was, “Colored ink! It must be true.”)

    So, while you are rethinking your newspaper in terms of colored ink, don’t forget to further transfigure your “readers” into “viewers” by shortening all stories. Don’t stop there, though. Where there is some room for words among the illustrations, fifteen-word summaries, and huge section titles, you can add features and columnists who are transparently chosen to appeal to a niche readership—one defined by its age or religion or politics.

    The perfect example of the latter two criteria is columnist Katherine Kersten, who is profiled by Brian Lambert in this issue. No honest observer would deny that she was added to the Strib’s lineup as part of a package intended to appeal to political and religious conservatives. (She came on board around the same time several syndicated conservative writers began to appear regularly on the opinion pages.)

    The fact that she’s conservative is not remarkable, per se. The fact that she’s so utterly predictable in her “family-values” brand of conservatism, and so consistently trite in her expression of it (her last two columns were about, respectively, the gentle old couple who met at Bible school and founded the Minnesota Family Council, and the evils of pervasive television violence) tells me that Strib editors have as little respect for the intelligence of their conservative readership as they do for the rest of us.

    The reporters and editors who create whatever value remains inherent in the Star Tribune are nearly unanimously discouraged. They know the fate that chopped at the hamstrings of the Pioneer Press after its sale also awaits them. The Pioneer Press’ managers professed surprise when so many veteran reporters gladly took the offered buyouts. They clearly underestimated the acrimony they had created. And now it’s happened on the other side of the river, too.

    Most reporters and editors believe, perhaps naively, that the essence of a newspaper is the news, not the packaging of the news. Increasingly, this puts them in conflict with their owners, who have no patience for idealistic notions about the crucial role a vigorous press plays in our culture, and no empathy for a work force that actually begs to do its job better.

    Maybe what Pruitt really meant when he called the Strib a model newspaper was that it’s a poor excuse for a real one.