Speak to the Hands

He didn’t want to strike me from the rolls,” says twenty-nine-year-old Becca Cillian of her father. “But he sort of had to … he was the bishop.” She’s a solidly built young woman with a wolf-like grin and curly hair that tumbles in an exuberant cascade down to her shoulders. The fact that her own … Read more

Love It and Leave It

African-American comedian Dave Chappelle has a recurring feature on his Comedy Central show, Chappelle’s Show, called “Ask a Black Dude.” During one segment, someone asked the Black Dude (aka Paul Mooney) why black men walk with a certain attitudinal swagger. Mooney responded that black men have a style that makes us the most imitated people … Read more

Ten Steps to Increased Anxiety!

Hello, everyone. My name is Colleen and I am a women’s magazine addict. I am addicted not to Harper’s Bazaar, not to Vogue, but to the kind of women’s magazines that are displayed at the checkout lanes of your mid-range grocery store chains. It’s embarrassing, but it’s true. Whether I’m on the Stairmaster at the … Read more

Better Off Without Him?

My dear friend Julie wants to marry Louis, our nearly house-trained Yorkie-Poo puppy. A lot of people might think it’s offbeat and even disturbing that Julie imagines matrimony with a small, furry dog, who, charming though he may be, has certain disgusting habits, like snacking on my nephew’s dirty diapers. Mostly, I’m used to the … Read more

Honey, You Married a Pervert

My buddy Ben saw an advertisement for a little boutique that specializes in sex toys for smart women—a small, independent shop owned and operated by women. It got him thinking. He told me it made him want to buy something for his wife, Val, as a surprise for their anniversary. Ben started to sort of … Read more

No Matter How You Slice It

I love food. I’m a food lover. Maybe the infatuation started when I was bartending to put myself through school; I always seemed to end up with the kitchen guys at 2 a.m., cooking up a mess of eggs and leftovers. But my real journey didn’t start until I fell in love with a chef––now … Read more

You Can’t Take It With You

Last year, my kumquat and I deemed mid-February a good time to soak it up in South Beach. Sunshine, not booze. At 8 A.M., he was off golfing, while I was setting up my kit on the pure white shingle (had I been naked I would have been perfectly camouflaged), lapped by azure waves. By … Read more

Thorstein Veblen and the New Barbarians

In 1899, the maverick economist Thorstein Veblen proposed a unified field theory of American civilization. In his savage and oracular masterpiece, The Theory of the Leisure Class, Veblen theorized that wasteful extravagance isn’t a mere byproduct of consumer capitalism, but its underlying rationale. After all, without gross displays of wealth—“conspicuous consumption” was Veblen’s memorable term—how … Read more

511 is a Joke

Here’s something we never thought we’d say: We were very sad to hear about the end of traffic reports on the radio. Public radio station KBEM, which is owned and operated by Minneapolis Public Schools, was on the receiving end of a pink slip issued by the Minnesota Department of Transportation when the new year … Read more

Micro-Opera!

With its cast of starving poets and musicians and creative squatters, Puccini’s La Bohème has not only inspired generations of bohemians; some would say it’s the best known and most accessible opera in the canon. When someone goes to the opera for the first time, frequently it’s to see La Bohème. It has also been … Read more